# Poll: Have you ever masturbated at work? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 22, 2010, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371 "2010-05-22T15:28:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/41 "2010-05-23T03:02:05Z")
Curtis, seriously? Is it possible to refrain from witnessing in every thread you participate in and accept the fact that your morality is not shared by EVERYONE? ---
**Author:** ![Rala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@Rala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rala)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/42 "2010-05-23T03:17:58Z")
If school counts as work. ---
**Author:** ![Discipline](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/82dd89/32.png) [@Discipline](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Discipline)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/43 "2010-05-23T03:26:37Z")
> [@Curtis LeMay](#): > > disgrace yourself where you can be caught easily. Caught? Wtf dude, go into the bathroom and use a stall. You don’t just whip it out in a unscheduled conference room. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/44 "2010-05-23T03:30:58Z")
> [@Curtis LeMay](#): > > HELL NO. If you have to do you should not disgrace yourself where you can be caught easily. Remind me never to work with you (when you’re old enough to work). ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/45 "2010-05-23T03:31:24Z")
I love that as I looked at the IMHO page, this thread title was followed by “What gets grease stains out of clothes?” 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/46 "2010-05-23T03:41:15Z")
> [@Curtis LeMay](#): > > HELL NO. If you have to do you should not disgrace yourself where you can be caught easily. > [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > This is a poll for people who have had jobs to masturbate at. Well, that and people who aren’t convinced that masturbation as wrong. :rolleyes: And put me down as WTF? The idea never even occurred to me. ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/47 "2010-05-23T04:26:21Z")
> [@Rala](#): > > If school counts as work. No, just work. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/48 "2010-05-23T04:31:16Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > What’s so disgraceful - masturbating? If God didn’t want us to masturbate, She wouldn’t have made our arms long enough to reach our genitals. That wouldn’t stop a lot of people. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/49 "2010-05-23T04:45:31Z")
> [@Antinor01](#): > > I’m almost 35 and I’m still that way. What, really? As often as I get erect, that would pretty freakin’ annoying. It doesn’t bother me at all if I don’t get off when incidentally aroused. ---
**Author:** ![gladtobeblazed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/85f322/32.png) [@gladtobeblazed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gladtobeblazed)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/50 "2010-05-23T05:00:20Z")
> [@Aesiron](#): > > What, really? As often as I get erect, that would pretty freakin’ annoying. It doesn’t bother me at all if I don’t get off when incidentally aroused. Doesn’t bother me either. Never has. I get probably a dozen erections per day. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/51 "2010-05-23T05:49:38Z")
Nope. But, then again, I don’t go to the bathroom either. I never bothered taking a break. My jobs were all something rather simple, like putting books back on their shelves at the library. I just stayed busy Now, at college, it was another story. After a while, I think I made it a goal to do it in every bathroom. It had to do with the fact that I was so sensitive that merely thinking about talking to a girl was sufficient stimulation. ---
**Author:** ![Uncommon\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Uncommon\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncommon_Sense)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/52 "2010-05-23T06:06:34Z")
Fuck it, yes I have. No more details are needed, except that I was also sleeping with one of the hottest women at the place. Her presence was a turn on thaqt had to be addressed. Control was secondary to job security. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/53 "2010-05-23T06:47:51Z")
There wasn’t a choice of, “No, but I would if I could.” Or, “Yes, who doesn’t”, for that matter. ---
**Author:** ![EvilTOJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee59a6/32.png) [@EvilTOJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EvilTOJ)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 7:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/54 "2010-05-23T07:12:40Z")
Hey it gets boring here at night with nothing to do, sometimes I’ll be chatting it up with a girl on my phone and have to… take care of things. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/55 "2010-05-23T07:20:20Z")
Well, there was the time I was doing a zoning assessment and the urge hit me at some random person’s office. Then there’s a long gap until my most recent job. I had a bad attack of spicy diarrhea, and I noticed my nether regions were a bit tingly. It seemed like a good idea at the time, not to mention it’s a large and well-maintained bathroom. ---
**Author:** ![boytyperanma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4491bb/32.png) [@boytyperanma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boytyperanma)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 7:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/56 "2010-05-23T07:32:26Z")
Many years ago. When I was 14-18. I worked at a business that sometimes I had no whole days with no one else around. Or during the school year I was going to school hoping a train then working 4-5 hours. Never beat off in school, had to do it sometime. After that never once at work. I work for myself now in other peoples homes, I’d never consider beating off in a customers house. I can always go home anytime I want… ---
**Author:** ![kidneyfailure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9f8e36/32.png) [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/57 "2010-05-23T07:37:12Z")
Aren’t you work masturbators worried about, like, hidden cameras and microphones? You don’t want to end up on one of those FOX “Caught on the Job” specials, do you? Or am I just extremely paranoid? ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 7:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/58 "2010-05-23T07:40:41Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#): > > Aren’t you work masturbators worried about, like, hidden cameras and microphones? You don’t want to end up on one of those FOX “Caught on the Job” specials, do you? Or am I just extremely paranoid? I’m pretty sure it’s illegal to put cameras in bathrooms. If not, oh well. They can enjoy the video of me jerking. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 8:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/59 "2010-05-23T08:22:36Z")
I used to work in porn. And no, I haven’t. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2010, 8:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/60 "2010-05-23T08:23:31Z")
> [@GuanoLad](#): > > I used to work in porn. > > And no, I haven’t. Well of course not. Wouldn’t that make your job harder? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371.md?page=4)