# Poll: On which side are your saltines buttered? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 31, 2015, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410 "2015-01-31T06:20:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2015, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/61 "2015-02-03T15:20:53Z")
Glad to see that the Butter Nutters are winning out over the Cracker Hackers. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2015, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/62 "2015-02-03T15:28:49Z")
I butter mine on the edge, which also pretty much allows me to live there. ---
**Author:** ![Roanrider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/278dde/32.png) [@Roanrider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roanrider)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2015, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/63 "2015-02-05T05:35:43Z")
Although the peanut butter version has been a part of my snack list since I was a kid I can only recall putting dairy butter on them as part of a recipe called Crack. There are plain and chocolate versions and they are as addictive as the name implys. > **[Vanilla Crack & Chocolate Crack](https://community.qvc.com/t5/Recipes/Vanilla-Crack-amp-Chocolate-Crack/m-p/270355#M11186)** > > Vanilla Crack 1 box salter soda crackers 2 sticks salted butter (8 oz.) 1 cup sugar 2 tsp. vanilla 1/2 cup salted nut pieces Line a 10" X 15" pan with heavy-duty foil and spray with Pam. Cover the pan completely with a single layer of crackers,... ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2015, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/64 "2015-02-05T15:08:42Z")
> [@Roanrider](#): > > Although the peanut butter version has been a part of my snack list since I was a kid I can only recall putting dairy butter on them as part of a recipe called Crack. There are plain and chocolate versions and they are as addictive as the name implys. > [Vanilla Crack & Chocolate Crack - Blogs & Forums](http://community.qvc.com/forums/recipe/topic/339186/vanilla-crack-chocolate-crack.aspx) Which side do you put the PB on? ---
**Author:** ![Roanrider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/278dde/32.png) [@Roanrider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roanrider)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2015, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/65 "2015-02-05T15:17:10Z")
I usually add toppings to the salted side. I haven’t tried the Crack with Peanut butter but I would think it would be very tasty. Then again that might just be going too far. Alas I am out of saltines so it will have to wait for another day. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2015, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/66 "2015-02-05T15:46:33Z")
Vegemite is the only appropriate topping for saltines. ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2015, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/67 "2015-02-05T18:19:10Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > You must have put peanut butter on a saltine once in your life? Never ever ever. ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2015, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/68 "2015-02-05T18:21:02Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > You must have put peanut butter on a saltine once in your life? Never ever ever. ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2015, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/69 "2015-02-05T18:23:44Z")
I won’t call it “weird”, but I will honestly say that in my 4 decades on this planet, I’ve never once ever heard of anybody doing it, or pining for it. So it is outside of my perception of crackers that I only would consider using for soup or cheese (no spreads). ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2015, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/70 "2015-02-05T18:38:16Z")
Which side do you put the cheese on? ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2015, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/71 "2015-02-05T19:03:15Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > Which side do you put the cheese on? For me, as I implied above, I’ve never even noticed that saltines have a salted and unsalted side. I guess I’d probably say the unsalted side if I had to make a choice, since cheese already is fairly salty. So unsalted butter I’d probably put on the salted side, if I were ever to do such a thing. And salted butter on the unsalted side. But this is all theoretical. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2015, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/72 "2015-02-05T19:15:42Z")
> [@MovieMogul](#): > > I won’t call it “weird”, but I will honestly say that in my 4 decades on this planet, I’ve never once ever heard of anybody doing it, or pining for it. So it is outside of my perception of crackers that I only would consider using for soup or cheese (no spreads). When you don’t want an entire sandwich, it’s a decent substitute. ---
**Author:** ![SlackerInc](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slackerinc/32/275_2.png) [@SlackerInc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SlackerInc)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2015, 8:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/73 "2015-03-10T08:47:34Z")
> [@Lamia](#): > > I’m Southern and I’d never seen or heard of a buttered saltine before this thread. I grew up in NC and neither had I, though I acknowledge **ChefGuy’s** logic. What I find the most interesting about this is that based on the responses ITT, it’s a non-rare thing, at least somewhat geographically dispersed; and yet quite a few of us not only have never put butter on a saltine, we’ve never heard of anyone \*else \*doing so before now. That’s some kind of fine line just under a sort of “critical mass”. ---
**Author:** ![OffByOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/45deac/32.png) [@OffByOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OffByOne)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2015, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/74 "2015-03-10T15:57:25Z")
> [@TheChileanBlob](#): > > Similar to the toilet paper orientation issue, there’s a correct way to butter saltines. The butter goes on the unsalted side. Then, when you approach your mouth with the cracker right side up (butter on top), your tongue contacts the salt first and goes “Yummy! Cracker incoming!” > > The salt would be wasted on the buttered side and your tongue would have to encounter a bland saltless cracker. Curse you! Since reading this, I tried it. Worst of all, I liked it! Last time I went to the grocery store, I had to force myself not to buy saltines. This is seriously putting a crimp in my diet. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2015, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/75 "2015-03-10T17:12:16Z")
Butter? On Crackers? I use them in soup or to scoop chili. Once in a great while I make Pnut butter sandwiches with them. ---
**Author:** ![funky\_little\_lee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e95f7d/32.png) [@funky\_little\_lee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/funky_little_lee)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2015, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/76 "2015-03-10T17:54:33Z")
I’m in favor of buttering the salty side. That being said, butter + peanut butter on matzoh is ab fab. ---
**Author:** ![Missy2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@Missy2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Missy2U)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2015, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/77 "2015-03-11T05:23:05Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > There’s an unsalted side? Yes. - the top and bottom are different. ---
**Author:** ![E-DUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/e-dub/32/403_2.png) [@E-DUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-DUB)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2015, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/78 "2015-03-11T20:45:59Z")
I don’t have a side preference. I make little peanut butter sandwiches with them. However, I’ve noticed of late that the saltines do not stand up to being peanut buttered and are more prone to break in my hand as I’m applying the covering. Bummer. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2015, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/79 "2015-03-11T21:21:11Z")
I make saltine “sandwiches” with the salted sides facing, and margarine in between. We only use “honest-to-God butter” for cooking. ---
**Author:** ![typoink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecb155/32.png) [@typoink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/typoink)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2015, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410/80 "2015-03-11T21:32:59Z")
…huh. So, apparently the thing my mom did all the time when I was a kid _isn’t_ normal. Everybody I’ve taught this trick to loves it, but I never thought it was rare. The proper way to butter a saltine: Place a small amount of butter (maybe .5 tsp) on the salted side the crackers. Arrange a handful of buttered crackers on a cookie sheet. Heat in a hot oven (400 degrees or so?) until the butter melts and the crackers JUST start to brown. Either dip them in soup or eat them straight. After 5-10 crackers, your tummy will assuredly feel better. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-on-which-side-are-your-saltines-buttered/711410.md?page=5)