# Poll: Satisfaction with sex frequency

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [October 31, 2010, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977 "2010-10-31T15:50:15Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/1 "2010-10-31T15:50:15Z")

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I’ve been involved in a few discussions recently about sex drive and how it can affect a relationship, especially if partners have different opinions on how much is enough. Obviously there’s going to be a huge variation in how much sex people are having, and how much they would _like_ to be having, and I’m curious to see what polling shows. Are people satisfied?

(poll on its way)

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**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/2 "2010-10-31T15:58:15Z")

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We’re usually around 2-3x per week. Occasionally we’ll go longer, but if it’s more than a week, that’s really rare and there’s usually some contributing factor like illness or something. I put that I would like to be having more, because frankly I would be happy with having sex every day. It’s really only kids and work and being tired etc. that keeps us from doing that.

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**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/3 "2010-10-31T16:04:56Z")

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Eh, I’ve washed this particular piece of linen often enough to have exhausted all sympathy hereabouts. :dubious:

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**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/4 "2010-10-31T19:34:44Z")

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Once a week, if I’m lucking. It sucks. It’s the one thing that stops us from being the perfect couple.

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**Author:** ![Peeta\_Mellark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bc8723/32.png) [@Peeta\_Mellark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peeta_Mellark)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/5 "2010-10-31T19:44:38Z")

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Currently, a couple times a day. And I’m a smug son of a bitch. (Or, you could describe me as “satisfied.”)

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**Author:** ![Kaio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c68b51/32.png) [@Kaio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaio)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/6 "2010-10-31T20:00:19Z")

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Ideally, once a day. During the _ahem_ “honeymoon phase” of a relationship, I’ve managed an average of twice a day (sometimes 3 times) for about a month; but by the end of that I was feeling a little burnt out.

So, in a perfect world, once a day, with the occasional weekend where we don’t come up for air. Realistically, I’d be okay with 4-5 times a week.

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**Author:** ![myskepticsight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cc9497/32.png) [@myskepticsight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/myskepticsight)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/7 "2010-10-31T20:36:41Z")

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My boyfriend lives a few hours away. We share a bed on average 4 times a month, 6 if we are lucky. And while I have started a new preventative migraine treatment that seems to be working (crossing fingers) over the last 6 months or so I have been down many weekends in pain, some of those being weekends with him.

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**Author:** ![Not\_a\_Platypus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d26b3c/32.png) [@Not\_a\_Platypus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Not_a_Platypus)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/8 "2010-10-31T20:56:35Z")

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I’m not totally satisfied, but I’m also the only thing keeping us from screwing more frequently. I’m working on my issues so we can move on and be more bunny-like.

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**Author:** ![Mrs.Cake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2acd7d/32.png) [@Mrs.Cake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs.Cake)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/9 "2010-10-31T21:15:20Z")

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My husband has been gone a lot for the last year and a half, most recently for 2 months for job reasons. Needless to say this has played havoc with my sex life (and presumably his as well). Luckily it is a temporary situation that will be resolved before too much longer and I expect things to improve and lose that sense of “quick, better grab some while we can” all the time.

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**Author:** ![gaffa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e68b1a/32.png) [@gaffa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gaffa)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/10 "2010-10-31T21:19:36Z")

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Male, and I answered “a few times a year”, and no, I am not happy with it. Curcumstances force me to be 500 miles away from my wife for a month or more at a time, and her post-menopausal drive is nearly non-existent. So when we do get together, sex is pretty far down on the priority list. And being on the other side of 50, my equipment is less reliable as well, though it still have the same level of desire as I had when I was in my twenties.

Yeah, it is pretty frustrating. And yes, I have used ED drugs, but they are very expensive.

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**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/11 "2010-10-31T21:26:10Z")

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I’m single, and not getting any.

And, while I would certainly enjoy sex if it was happening, I’m not bothered by the lack, right now.

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**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/12 "2010-10-31T21:27:58Z")

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Okay, so the women want more sex, and the men want more sex. The million dollar question is: _WHY AREN’T WE HAVING MORE SEX?!_

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**Author:** ![gaffa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e68b1a/32.png) [@gaffa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gaffa)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/13 "2010-10-31T21:33:54Z")

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> [@MeanOldLady](#):
>
> Okay, so the women want more sex, and the men want more sex. The million dollar question is: _WHY AREN’T WE HAVING MORE SEX?!_

Because the men who want more sex are not partnered with the women who want more sex. Often they are partnered with people who either want less sex or add perfectly happy with the amount of sex they are having.

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**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/14 "2010-10-31T21:37:10Z")

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Ah.

Mistakes were made…

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**Author:** ![MichaelEmouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/michaelemouse/32/101_2.png) [@MichaelEmouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MichaelEmouse)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/15 "2010-10-31T22:02:01Z")

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> [@MeanOldLady](#):
>
> Ah.
> 
> Mistakes were made…

I had the same reaction you did and then thoguht of Gaffa’s answer.

Also, it’s possible for two people to want more sex but be too busy, have mismatched schedules or want more of it generally but not feel like it at the same time.

Also, some people have been known to want more sex but with someone other than their spouse. If it’s combined with an unwillingess to cheat, you could get this result.

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**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/16 "2010-10-31T22:07:35Z")

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I can’t really answer the poll for fear of skewing the results. Being in a long distance relationship means that I’m happy with the amount of sex we have when we’re together, but I wish that we were together more often.

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**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/17 "2010-10-31T22:22:24Z")

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I’m in the same position as **Asimovian**. We have different sex drives, but the limiting factor right now is definitely distance, not drive.

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**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2010, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/18 "2010-10-31T22:30:26Z")

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I’m single and not getting any. I’d like sex but don’t know if I want the relationship that it usually entails.

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**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2010, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/19 "2010-11-01T00:04:52Z")

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Hard to answer your poll. I’ve always (at least once I got past my horny teenage years) suffered from low libido–once I get going, I enjoy sex, but I am rarely in the mood to initiate it. I would like that to change, but as I currently am, I’m fine with the amount of sex I’m getting. That having been said, it would be great to want it more. My husband has a relatively low libido as well, but I’m sure he would like it more if I initiated sex from time to time.

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**Author:** ![HazelNutCoffee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ac91a4/32.png) [@HazelNutCoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HazelNutCoffee)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2010, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977/20 "2010-11-01T00:30:51Z")

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I answered “daily” but sometimes we have sex more than once a day, and sometimes we go for a couple days without because of some reason or other. It averages out to once a day, and I’m perfectly happy with the way things are now.

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-satisfaction-with-sex-frequency/558977.md?page=2)
