# Poll: Show-ers vs. Grow-ers (it's about penises, people) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 10, 2001, 10:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938 "2001-07-10T10:25:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 10:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/1 "2001-07-10T10:25:14Z")
No, not _showers_ (y’know, those funny cleansing devices that create a multi-streamed jet of water), show-ers versus grow-ers. Some guys have a really, really tiny tadger when soft, yet manage to grow to normal (or, in the case of at least one person I know, relatively mammoth) proportions. Other guys have a big ol’ chunk of meat that dangles proudly 'tween their legs at all times, yet when the moment of glory comes around, they don’t increase in size a whole lot. So, guys, what type are you? For the record, I fall into the former category… pitifully dinky normally, yet just about average when I start a-boingin’ around. ---
**Author:** ![Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 11:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/2 "2001-07-10T11:06:19Z")
But I’ve got lots of experience in the field, since I spend too much time at a clothing optional beach. The problem is how to answer without seeming _boastful_. 😉 I am a grower… which comes in handy during the bare buns run. I’ve found that my mini-B can shrink right down during physical activity when it’s not needed, such as playing soccer. During a relaxed, drinking beer, no chance of accidental dismemberment moment, it expands (while still flaccid) to being one head past a bag. Stage 3 is a cervix-bumping tool. I really hope my mom doesn’t read this. ---
**Author:** ![False\_God](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ee7513/32.png) [@False\_God](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/False_God)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 11:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/3 "2001-07-10T11:58:23Z")
Ditto, Barbarian. When I’m just a’walkin around the house starkers (hey people, I live in DC-it’s freakin’ hot and humid) I think the little guy knows he won’t be asked to do any heavy lifting, and goes into standby mode. My wife mentioned something about this the other day-“I know you’re hung and all, but sometimes I’ll just look at ya, like when you get back from the pool, and wonder-where did he go?”-the last said in a plaintive “Come back, Shane” voice. So yes, put me down as a grow-er. ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/4 "2001-07-10T12:24:15Z")
Yeah, it only makes an appearance when it’s needed. ---
**Author:** ![bunnymom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c4cdca/32.png) [@bunnymom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bunnymom)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/5 "2001-07-10T12:53:31Z")
BunnyPapa is a grower. Not very impressive when he’s just sitting there, but if you wake Mr. Happy - wow! You men have such interesting genitals,lol. ---
**Author:** ![thinksnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thinksnow/32/2849_2.png) [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/6 "2001-07-10T20:01:14Z")
I’m pretty sure I posted this somewhere in [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=45523), but… > [@](#): > > Turgid vs. flaccid size ratio: ~8/3 > Length vs. circumference ratio: ~24/25 No, I didn’t measure myself, I had a curious ex-. This was in the summer, so to chime in with the others, when it’s cold out, after swimming or whatever, it would look more like a fur coat with a button (though I suppose I can’t say the “fur coat” part anymore.) ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/7 "2001-07-10T22:43:08Z")
Grower. Let us say that length-wise I double and sometimes more. Width-wise I am not as impressive. ---
**Author:** ![ssj\_man2k](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@ssj\_man2k](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ssj_man2k)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2001, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/8 "2001-07-11T07:07:30Z")
I’m a grower. I think most men are. ---
**Author:** ![ricepad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b38774/32.png) [@ricepad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ricepad)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2001, 7:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/9 "2001-07-11T07:17:12Z")
Grower here…but I had a roommate in college who, when flaccid, dangled mightily (so he said…I never saw it). He used to say that women didn’t want to see a magic show…they prefered to see a preview of exactly what they were getting. Then again, he talked a LOT. ---
**Author:** ![White\_Lightning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@White\_Lightning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/White_Lightning)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2001, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/10 "2001-07-11T08:04:11Z")
Yeah, grower here too. Particularly grateful for the way it goes into hiding when involved in athletics, as **Barbarian** pointed out. OTOH, sometimes I ‘grow’ for almost no reason at all (I’m still 20, looking to grow out of these ‘surprises’), and become a ‘show-er’ for a few minutes. That’s life, I guess. ---
**Author:** ![Cap\_n\_Crude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Cap\_n\_Crude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cap_n_Crude)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2001, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/11 "2001-07-11T13:56:38Z")
Grower. Definite grower. I can’t find the thread where I discussed this, but I’m the one who introduced the concepts of “telescopic penis” and “turtle” to the SDMB. ---
**Author:** ![TheLoadedDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@TheLoadedDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheLoadedDog)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2001, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/12 "2001-07-11T15:06:28Z")
"Wendy? No, I’ve never had a girlfriend called Wendy. That tattoo actually says, “WELCOME TO JAMAICA. HAVE A NICE DAY”. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2001, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/13 "2001-07-11T19:38:09Z")
Lil MB is **Most unimpressive** when not needed. In fact, I’m glad to know that there are other growers out there. Can we start some sort of support club? (Too many jokes there…I’ll just leave it alone.) From the lady’s estimates, I quadruple in in length and double in width when the situation calls for it. ---
**Author:** ![BunnyGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@BunnyGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BunnyGirl)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2001, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/14 "2001-07-11T19:42:35Z")
I’m laughing. With you! With you! Not at you! 😃 Man, the only I’ve got to worry about is whether I’m cold and if I remembered to wear a bra! ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2001, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/15 "2001-07-12T07:57:11Z")
> [@](#): > > Man, the only I’ve got to worry about is whether I’m cold and if I remembered to wear a bra! Pictures, please. We’ll tell you exactly how much you have to worry. And be nice to Little SPOOFE. He tries really hard, don’tcha fella? Yes, you do… yesss, you do! Oh, you siwwy widdle thing… Aww… what a cute little guy! Now he’s slobbering all over the… uh… nevermind. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2001, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/16 "2001-07-12T13:22:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by False\_God \* > **My wife mentioned something about this the other day-“I know you’re hung and all, but sometimes I’ll just look at ya, like when you get back from the pool, and wonder-where did he go?”-the last said in a plaintive “Come back, Shane” voice.** Sounds like the Seinfeld episode in which George, fresh out of the cold swimming pool, gets walked in on while changing. ELAINE: “It **shrinks**?” As for me, none of your damn business, except to say that I get no complaints…😉 ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2001, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/17 "2001-07-12T13:43:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by BunnyGirl \* > With you! With you! Not at you! Just so _you_ know, and because I fear that there are a great number of women who don’t know this little fact: [/quote] **There is _no right way_ for a woman to laugh at a naked man.** [/quote] Here endeth the pubic … er … public service announcement. Re the OP: Mine works like any good piece of home exercise equipment, in that it folds away for easy storage. ---
**Author:** ![BunnyGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@BunnyGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BunnyGirl)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2001, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/18 "2001-07-12T13:47:33Z")
> [@](#): > > Pictures, please. We’ll tell you exactly how much you have to worry. Hmmmm…don’t think I’ve ever considered pictures! 😃 > [@](#): > > There is no right way for a woman to laugh at a naked man. Harumph! I’ve never laughed a naked man…I mean, not one standing in front of me in real life. Now, on-line…bwaahahhaaahaaa. You’re mine, boys, all mine. :rubs hands together gleefully: My step-mom used to peek down my dad’s swim trunks when we’d go swimming and say, “Where’d he go, Dale, where’d he go?” and then reach in try to “find” him. Cruel, I know. ---
**Author:** ![thinksnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thinksnow/32/2849_2.png) [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2001, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/19 "2001-07-12T14:00:05Z")
> [@](#): > > Hmmmm…don’t think I’ve ever considered pictures! This can be…arranged. As for your [proclivity](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?postid=1399509#post1399509) for going bra-less, this is a good thing and should be encouraged, but not in a thread about penis size, or else we’ll have to adjust all the numbers according to growth. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![BunnyGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@BunnyGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BunnyGirl)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2001, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938/20 "2001-07-12T14:05:14Z")
> [@](#): > > or else we’ll have to adjust all the numbers according to growth 😆 Okay, you caught me on that one. That was funny! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-show-ers-vs-grow-ers-its-about-penises-people/71938.md?page=2)