# Poll: Would you become a vampire?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [August 16, 2010, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468 "2010-08-16T23:09:23Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)
#### Post date: [August 17, 2010, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/21 "2010-08-17T14:12:14Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#):
>
> It really depends on what if any changes to the personality are involved. I don’t want to turn into a sociopath; and with some varieties of vampire the original personality is essentially outright destroyed. As for the physical drawbacks; I already like the night and have no interest in children. And with immortality on my side, I’ll eventually be able to get around the sunlight problem by waiting until technology advances to the point that I can replace my weak vampire flesh with superior cybernetics, and become the _ **robot with the brain of a vampire!!** _ For the total B-movie lifestyle.
But you would only be five feet tall…
OTOH you could have big chainsaw hands, Rzzzzz!!
As for me, as long as it’s not a wussy Meyerverse “sparklepire” I’d seriously consider it
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### Author:  [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)
#### Post date: [August 17, 2010, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/22 "2010-08-17T14:24:27Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#):
>
> It really depends on what if any changes to the personality are involved. I don’t want to turn into a sociopath; and with some varieties of vampire the original personality is essentially outright destroyed. As for the physical drawbacks; I already like the night and have no interest in children. And with immortality on my side, I’ll eventually be able to get around the sunlight problem by waiting until technology advances to the point that I can replace my weak vampire flesh with superior cybernetics, and become the _ **robot with the brain of a vampire!!** _ For the total B-movie lifestyle.
And thus the Cyber-vamp was born. Scourge of cars everywhere, as they quake in fear of having their motor oil drained.
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### Author:  [@Lanzy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lanzy)
#### Post date: [August 17, 2010, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/23 "2010-08-17T15:13:14Z")
I don’t even like blood, but to live forever, have super powers, I guess I could learn to like it, and would probably quit being squemish about killing people after a while, at least a week or two.
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### Author:  [@MTCicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MTCicero)
#### Post date: [August 17, 2010, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/24 "2010-08-17T15:33:59Z")
I chose “no” since, much as I admire these people and will fight just as hard as they do to gain real social and legal equality, I’ve never actually wanted to be gay.
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### Author:  [@Driver8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Driver8)
#### Post date: [August 17, 2010, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/25 "2010-08-17T16:24:58Z")
Immortality is quite tempting, but I’m going to vote “no”. For one thing, I am extremely squeamish, for another immortality is wasted since nothing is open when I can go! Thousands of years to visit interesting museums, galleries and attractions sounds pretty neat, but given they mostly close at 5pm it would be pure torture. At the end of the day completely avoiding daylight is a horrible inconvenience.
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### Author:  [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)
#### Post date: [August 17, 2010, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/26 "2010-08-17T16:30:22Z")
What **Driver** said. I’m all up for immortality, but not at the expense of becoming a prisoner in my own home.
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### Author:  [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)
#### Post date: [August 17, 2010, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/27 "2010-08-17T16:31:47Z")
> [@Driver8](#):
>
> At the end of the day completely avoiding daylight is a horrible inconvenience.
Funny, I think that would be the easiest time to avoid it.
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### Author:  [@jackdavinci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackdavinci)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/28 "2010-08-18T02:12:10Z")
Maybe. It would depend on the specific pros and cons of the vampire mythos. I would probably try and get in shape and maybe store up some sperm before I did it.
OTOH first, having the knowledge that supernatural things exist, I would research what other supernatural enhancements might be available to me. Being a shifter of some kind could potentially be cooler than being a vampire. Or a good witch of some kind…
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### Author:  [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/29 "2010-08-18T03:10:23Z")
> [@Lobot](#):
>
> It’s almost like the _Star Trek_ transporter dilemma for me. Is it you beaming down or is it your clone?
>
> Vampires seem to be almost new people with superficially similar traits to their former selves. Would I be a vampire or would it be my doppelganger going goth forever instead? That’s the key question.
This idea has been used in some vampire stories. It was the official explanation for vampires used by vampire hunters in the White Wolf Masquerade world for example. If you were killed by a vampire, you died and your soul went off to the afterlife. And at the moment of your death, a demon would take possession of your body and your memories. So vampires were not humans, they were just soulless creatures that imitated humans so it was okay to kill them.
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### Author:  [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/30 "2010-08-18T04:45:49Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#):
>
> If my life were a round of golf, I’d be about on the 12th hole, so I think I’d convert…
I’m stuck on that windmill hole, the one that keeps wedging my ball between one of the vanes and the decorative stone edging…
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### Author:  [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/31 "2010-08-18T05:25:39Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#):
>
> > [@Lobot](#):
> >
> > Vampires seem to be almost new people with superficially similar traits to their former selves. Would I be a vampire or would it be my doppelganger going goth forever instead? That’s the key question.
>
> This idea has been used in some vampire stories. It was the official explanation for vampires used by vampire hunters in the White Wolf Masquerade world for example. If you were killed by a vampire, you died and your soul went off to the afterlife. And at the moment of your death, a demon would take possession of your body and your memories. So vampires were not humans, they were just soulless creatures that imitated humans so it was okay to kill them.
Are you sure? 'Cause that sucks. A lot.
I’m only really familiar with the game through Bloodlines and Werewolf, but making your future vampire self not-you makes the ghouls and the tendency for some vampires to turn their lovers less interesting. And saying, “It’s okay, kill as many as you like! It’s not like they have souls or anything,” is just stupid when they’re supposed to be one option as protagonists and player characters.
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### Author:  [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/32 "2010-08-18T05:30:58Z")
Remember, it’s the Hunters’ story - they kill vamps…it helps to dehumanize them (literally).
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### Author:  [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/33 "2010-08-18T05:41:50Z")
> [@Tengu](#):
>
> Remember, it’s the Hunters’ story…
I overlooked that bit. Thanks. :smack:
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### Author:  [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/34 "2010-08-18T05:44:48Z")
Can I go out if I wear a big hat?
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### Author:  [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/35 "2010-08-18T06:05:06Z")
Vampires do not get in to Valhalla, so no.
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### Author:  [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 8:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/36 "2010-08-18T08:33:17Z")
> [@Grumman](#):
>
> What **Driver** said. I’m all up for immortality, but not at the expense of becoming a prisoner in my own home.
There are a lot of places open at night, especially in the winter. I’m sure you could move far enough north to make that time even longer. And, if I remember correctly, rainy days are enough to get out.
The only reason not seeing the sun would bother me is if it’s still linked to SAD, but I assume it isn’t, unless all vampires are depressed.
And I agree that being a Buffy vampire would not be an option, unless I can keep my soul from the moment of vamping. Remember both Angelus and Spike murdered a lot of people before they had their conscience back.
Oh, and the Slayer better know about it, and know not to kill me, but no one else. Have her kill whoever vamped me, and no one else think I’m human. But, if I’m going to go that far, I might as well find a good witch to make me invulnerable to sunlight.
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### Author:  [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/37 "2010-08-18T11:18:19Z")
A resounding no. Never mind being a vampire - just being immortal sounds horrible all on its own. I’m with Susan Ertz:
> [@](#):
>
> Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.
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### Author:  [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/38 "2010-08-18T11:45:41Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#):
>
This idea has been used in some vampire stories. It was the official explanation for vampires used by vampire hunters in the White Wolf Masquerade world for example. If you were killed by a vampire, you died and your soul went off to the afterlife. And at the moment of your death, a demon would take possession of your body and your memories. So vampires were not humans, they were just soulless creatures that imitated humans so it was okay to kill them.
[/QUOTE]
It could be worse, in the literary Dracula, Van Helsing implies that the soul is imprisoned in the vampire’s animated corpse, creating a sort of living hell. If that’s not bad enough, the sins the vampire commits get attached to the imprisoned soul.
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### Author:  [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/39 "2010-08-18T12:27:22Z")
I don’t want to be immortal, thanks, especially not with conditionals like that. In fact, I’m kind of looking forward to this life being over, in a perverse-yet-not-intending-it-to-be-self-induced way.
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### Author:  [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)
#### Post date: [August 18, 2010, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-would-you-become-a-vampire/550468/40 "2010-08-18T12:28:43Z")
A pretty amazing percentage perfectly willing to become night-dwelling murders and monstrous parasites on humanity just for the chance to live longer than normal.
Perhaps this question needs to be added to the standard psychological exam as a test for Sociopathic Tendencies.
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