# Polyamorous people **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 22, 2019, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328 "2019-05-22T02:18:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/21 "2019-05-22T03:23:23Z")
Who was the poster here who tried stand up comedy. I loved one of his jokes: “How many people here are in an open relationship” (pause) “that they know about?” I know some people who are in polyamorous relationships. They like it. It’s too complicated for me, though. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/22 "2019-05-22T03:26:55Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > He was. He was a slutty man. She was a slutty woman. I should have introduced them to each other. The could go all polyamorous together. About how many people does someone have to have sex with before you consider them “slutty”? ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/23 "2019-05-22T03:27:38Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > I know some people who are in polyamorous relationships. They like it. I also know some Mormons who dig it. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/24 "2019-05-22T03:29:36Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > Fair enough, but “slutty” seems to be a derogatory term to apply to someone. It is. Perhaps “always ready to fuck and thinking about it a lot” would be a more appropriate label. You know…A.D.I.D.A.S. Thanks Korn! ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/25 "2019-05-22T03:31:01Z")
As a friend of mine put it, shortly after her husband left her, “There’s a difference between being poly and sleeping around until you find someone else you’d rather be with.” I’ve known some poly people who were in long-term, stable poly relationships. I’ve known lots of people who were in unstable or unsuccessful ones. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/26 "2019-05-22T03:44:26Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > About how many people does someone have to have sex with before you consider them “slutty”? Why is it on me to consider them slutty? It was a general consensus. I didn’t make up the rules of promiscuity. Let me tell you about my best friend Sophie. She’s a garden variety hottie. I didn’t make her that way. I didn’t label her that way. It’s just the way she is. When she divorced she purposefully set out to screw around. She told me straight up she was a slut. I don’t think it is as bad as you think to be a slut. It may just be the semantics. I dont think its gender specific either. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/27 "2019-05-22T03:56:12Z")
The OP comes from a guy who wishes his ONE super power to be able to make women suck his dick when he snaps his fingers. He’s got a few other lovely posts on this board as well. Just so you know where the OP is coming from. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/28 "2019-05-22T04:07:22Z")
Missed the edit: [Linky to above post](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=21092367&postcount=40) ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/29 "2019-05-22T04:09:27Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Why is it on me to consider them slutty? It was a general consensus. I didn’t make up the rules of promiscuity. It’s on you because \*\*\*you know an active slut specimen currently in the wild \*\*\*(which is SUPER important to science to observe them in their natural state) and are providing bad, bad, BAD observational data about your friend whom I consequently now want to fuck. Thanks. Maybe you can be my liasion with your friend. I have been known to drive long distances for sluts, especially if they live in a trailer home and their first name is Tanqueray. > [@Grrr](#): > > The OP comes from a guy who wishes his ONE super power to be able to make women suck his dick when he snaps his fingers. > > He’s got a few other lovely posts on this board as well. > > Just so you know where the OP is coming from. To be fair, that’s an impressive superpower. But there’s NO WAY I would choose that as my ONLY one. It would have to be part of an options package, like on cars but for superheroes. You’re invisible, you can fly, women also suck your Wang computer’s dongle…at the snap of a finger. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/30 "2019-05-22T04:11:53Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Why is it on me to consider them slutty? It was a general consensus. I didn’t make up the rules of promiscuity. > Let me tell you about my best friend Sophie. > She’s a garden variety hottie. I didn’t make her that way. I didn’t label her that way. It’s just the way she is. When she divorced she purposefully set out to screw around. She told me straight up she was a slut. I don’t think it is as bad as you think to be a slut. It may just be the semantics. I dont think its gender specific either. The word “slut” is commonly considered to be a slur on someone’s (always a woman’s, according to the dictionary) character. How bad a slur it is may vary by local culture and usage, but it is never less than a condemnation, that I have ever run into. I believe you are being tasked with the sexual double standard that words like “slut” apply only to women, while men who behave even more promiscuously are only called, at worst, pigs. I believe it was an effort to call your attention to your (perhaps) unthinkingly falling into this usage without paying deeper attention to it, and how words like “slut” harm all women, even when one uses it about herself. Polyamory, on the other hand, has nothing to do with promiscuity _per se_. It could be three people who have never had sex with anyone but the other two in the group, and it could expand to anything outward from there. So you cannot conclude that someone is promiscuous just because they are part of a polyamorous arrangement. ---
**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/31 "2019-05-22T04:19:45Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > All of them, self included. Hey hey hey now! You’re implying that I’m cheap, and easy. Inexpensive and user friendly is a feature not a bug, regardless of sex or gender ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/32 "2019-05-22T04:20:52Z")
> [@Roderick\_Femm](#): > > The word “slut” is commonly considered to be a slur on someone’s (always a woman’s, according to the dictionary) character. How bad a slur it is may vary by local culture and usage, but it is never less than a condemnation, that I have ever run into. I believe you are being tasked with the sexual double standard that words like “slut” apply only to women, while men who behave even more promiscuously are only called, at worst, pigs. I believe it was an effort to call your attention to your (perhaps) unthinkingly falling into this usage without paying deeper attention to it, and how words like “slut” harm all women, even when one uses it about herself. > > Polyamory, on the other hand, has nothing to do with promiscuity _per se_. It could be three people who have never had sex with anyone but the other two in the group, and it could expand to anything outward from there. So you cannot conclude that someone is promiscuous just because they are part of a polyamorous arrangement. Thank you. I now understand. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/33 "2019-05-22T04:28:22Z")
> [@DorkVader](#): > > Hey hey hey now! > You’re implying that I’m cheap, and easy. > > Inexpensive and user friendly is a feature not a bug. I sell cars for a living; I understand this language! Features! “This car isn’t cheap, it’s inexpensive!” “Yeah your cock won’t fit in the tailpipe, that’s what greased knotholes are for…”, etcetera. Deal with this ALL…THE…TIME. Diesel lovers are the worst brand loyalists but at least their cocks fit in the Duramax tailpipe as it’s 3" in diameter. I just told a 7’2" customer dude the other day how to properly lube up said 3" tailpipe with DEF fluid. He was golden after that. I’m good at my job, AND flexible (time permitting). ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/34 "2019-05-22T04:35:26Z")
Nm. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/35 "2019-05-22T04:40:12Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Nm. Aw, c’mon! :):)🙂 ---
**Author:** ![UCBearcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/77aa72/32.png) [@UCBearcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UCBearcats)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/36 "2019-05-22T04:43:23Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > The OP comes from a guy who wishes his ONE super power to be able to make women suck his dick when he snaps his fingers. > > He’s got a few other lovely posts on this board as well. > > Just so you know where the OP is coming from. Cool, thanks giving me credit. ---
**Author:** ![UCBearcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/77aa72/32.png) [@UCBearcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UCBearcats)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/37 "2019-05-22T04:45:58Z")
> [@Sunny\_Daze](#): > > From Wiki: > > This may mean that the relationships are open. It may mean that the parties involved are committed to one another, but there just happen to be more than 2 of them. It may mean that some of them are committed and some of them aren’t. > > I think slutty is a poor way to describe it. What do you feel is a better term? Easy, self-indulgent, immoral ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/38 "2019-05-22T04:47:58Z")
> [@UCBearcats](#): > > What do you feel is a better term? Easy, self-indulgent, immoral Bob Huggins? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![UCBearcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/77aa72/32.png) [@UCBearcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UCBearcats)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/39 "2019-05-22T04:53:01Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > Bob Huggins? > > 😃 He is a slutty drunk. Good call! ---
**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2019, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328/40 "2019-05-22T04:53:52Z")
> [@UCBearcats](#): > > What do you feel is a better term? Easy, self-indulgent, immoral Way to pass judgement on something you clearly don’t understand,! I have some friends, I don’t think they’d mind being used for illustrative purposes in this instance. They’re in a triad. I was in the wedding of Boy and Girl A. They added Girl B to the mix sometime after the wedding. They are stable, loving, committed, and not even a little slutty, easy, self indulgent or immoral. They’re awesome and all three of them love each other very much, and wouldn’t cheat on their shared relationship. As opposed to many men and women who pretend to be monogamous but cheat regularly. Who is immoral? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/polyamorous-people/834328.md?page=3)