# Pope John Paul II has died. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 1, 2005, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273 "2005-04-01T18:34:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/41 "2005-04-01T19:06:33Z")
> [@Munch](#): > > QuickSilver, there are plenty of Pit threads regarding the Pope where there is plenty of room for you to crap all over. Please remove your ugly comments from MPSIMS. Not slamming the Pope, **Munch** , just the media feeding frenzy. I mean no disrespect to all who respect and look up to him. My appologies. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/42 "2005-04-01T19:09:21Z")
> [@Kythereia](#): > > I figured they would get a new pope šŸ˜‰ I just wanted to know the specificsā€“which I found shortly after. Thanks! _smooches to all_ > > Requiescant in paceā€¦ Per NPR this morning, a specific Cardinal will call out three times to the Pope to make sure he doesnā€™t respond. Then they tap him on the head with a silver hammer (hence the previous musical malady). When he does not respond then they close the doors near St. Peterā€™s and declare 9 days of mourning. All Cardinals who are under 80(?) years old then congregate in the Vatican to elect a new pope. This congregation meets no sooner than 15 days after the pope has died but no later than 20 days. (Thatā€™s the gist, I may have gotten some parts wrong) ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/43 "2005-04-01T19:10:57Z")
What are the odds that the Pontiff is playing an April Fools prank on the Cardinals? ---
**Author:** ![Improv\_Geek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b3f665/32.png) [@Improv\_Geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Improv_Geek)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/44 "2005-04-01T19:11:09Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > Iā€™m not jumping for joy over his passing. Not the least bit. Itā€™s the media circus that makes me crazy. I guess I can see that, I was just curious. Iā€™m not catholic, but I respect him as a leader of a faith. I understand the circus making you crazy, but at least CNN isnā€™t like Slashdot, where the mods are posting every joke news item they can find. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/45 "2005-04-01T19:12:58Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > What are the odds that the Pontiff is playing an April Fools prank on the Cardinals? I was thinking the Popeā€™s last act might have been the biggest April Foolā€™s prank in recorded history. ---
**Author:** ![Improv\_Geek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b3f665/32.png) [@Improv\_Geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Improv_Geek)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/46 "2005-04-01T19:14:26Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > What are the odds that the Pontiff is playing an April Fools prank on the Cardinals? I must say that however angry much of the world would be, it would make him a historical pope. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/47 "2005-04-01T19:16:47Z")
Well, right now on the front page of CNN theyā€™ve got: "\> BREAKING NEWS AP: The Vatican denies reports in Italian media that Pope John Paul II has died. " ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/48 "2005-04-01T19:19:10Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > What are the odds that the Pontiff is playing an April Fools prank on the Cardinals? 20 years ago, probably pretty good. This one actually appears to have had a pretty good sense of humor. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/49 "2005-04-01T19:23:42Z")
> [@DMark](#): > > A quote from that story: > ā€œAs late as 1903, at the death of Pope Leo XIII, a popeā€™s death was verified by striking the pontiffā€™s forehead with a silver hammer.ā€ > > I guess that is one way to verify if someone is dead. How big is the hammer? A nine-pounder may indeed be a way to verify if someone is dead. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/50 "2005-04-01T19:24:04Z")
As of this time stamp, [cyberpresse.com](http://cyberpresse.com) is reporting: > [@](#): > > Bulletin spĆ©cial : Le pape nā€™est pas mort, selon le Vatican > Le Vatican dĆ©ment la mort du pape. La chaĆ®ne CNN, lā€™agence de presse Reuters et des mĆ©dias italiens avaient affirmĆ© plus tĆ“t que Jean Paul II Ć©tait peut-ĆŖtre dĆ©cĆ©dĆ©. > [@](#): > > \*Special bulletin: The Pope is not dead, according to the Vatican. > The Vatican denies that the Pope is dead. CNN, Reuters, and the Italian media had said earlier that John Paul II may have died. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/51 "2005-04-01T19:36:54Z")
\ ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/52 "2005-04-01T19:39:46Z")
According to ABC (thatā€™s the U.S. ABC) their sources say the Pope is still alive, as well as the official Vatican denials. ABC reporter is saying the Vatican has been unusually forthcoming with reports on the Popeā€™s condition. ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/53 "2005-04-01T19:40:19Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#): > > According to the reporter on CNN, the Pope is showing no signs of brain activity on an EEG. Neither did Mrs. Schiavo. So we know the Vatican doesnā€™t count that as dead. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/54 "2005-04-01T19:51:54Z")
> [@Hal Briston](#): > > \ Coronor: Bring out your dead! Cardinal: Hereā€™s one. Coronor: Ninepence. Pope: Iā€™m not dead! Coronor: What? Cardinal: Nothing. Hereā€™s your ninepence. Pope: Iā€™m not dead! Coronor:'Ere. He says heā€™s not dead! Cardinal: Yes, he is. Pope: Iā€™m not! Coronor: He isnā€™t? Cardinal: Well, he will be soon. Heā€™s very ill. Pope: Iā€™m getting better! Cardinal: No, youā€™re not. Youā€™ll be stone dead in a moment. Coronor: Oh, I canā€™t take him like that. Itā€™s against regulations. Pope: I donā€™t want to go on the cart! Cardinal: Oh, donā€™t be such a baby. Coronor: I canā€™t take him. Pope: I feel fine! Cardinal: Well, do us a favour. Coronor: I canā€™t. Cardinal: Well, can you hang around a couple of minutes? He wonā€™t be long. Coronor: No, Iā€™ve got to go to the Sumatrans. Theyā€™ve lost nine thousand today. Cardinal: Well, whenā€™s your next round? Coronor: Thursday. Pope: I think Iā€™ll go for a walk. Cardinal: Youā€™re not fooling anyone, you know. Look. Isnā€™t there something you can do? Pope: I feel happy. I feel happyā€¦ I feelā€¦ [Coronor looks around furtively] WHACK Cardinal: Ah, thanks very much. Coronor: Not at all. See you on Thursday. ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/55 "2005-04-01T19:57:28Z")
> [@](#): > > [Coronor looks around furtively] > > WHACK With no doubt a silver hammer. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/56 "2005-04-01T20:05:50Z")
:smack: I take back my appology. šŸ˜› And all of you are _so_ going to hell! On the HOV lane no less. šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![squeegee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/squeegee/32/14537_2.png) [@squeegee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/squeegee)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/57 "2005-04-01T20:18:55Z")
[Not dead.](http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/nm/20050401/wl_nm/pope_dc_72) > [@A Vatican Official](#): > > ā€œIt is not true that the Pope is dead and there is no truth that his electro-encephalogram is flat because there is no such machine in the papal apartmentsā€ ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/58 "2005-04-01T20:48:42Z")
> [@jk1245](#): > > In any event, Godspeed JPII\* > > \*How he autographed a baseball when in the US For years, people have referred to him as J2P2. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/59 "2005-04-01T20:54:00Z")
> [@Clothahump](#): > > For years, people have referred to him as J2P2. Iā€™m surprised JP II: Ecclesiastic Boogaloo isnā€™t more common. ---
**Author:** ![Etherman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/958977/32.png) [@Etherman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Etherman)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2005, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273/60 "2005-04-01T21:19:09Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#): > > Iā€™m surprised JP II: Ecclesiastic Boogaloo isnā€™t more common. I keep thinking of the line from family guy, when they announce the Popeā€™s appearance: ā€œLets get ready to huuummble!ā€ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pope-john-paul-ii-has-died/297273.md?page=4)