# PorkDope 2002, a.k.a. Porkapalooza. June 1, Mpls **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 11, 2002, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438 "2002-03-11T02:54:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![BlackKnight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eb8c5e/32.png) [@BlackKnight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlackKnight)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2002, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/121 "2002-05-24T22:10:17Z")
I now have a car! However, I’ve never driven more than 30-minutes away from home before. (You may all point and laugh now.) And the thought of driving anywhere near the Cities scares me. I’ll be there if I can work up the gumption. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2002, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/122 "2002-05-25T05:34:41Z")
Hey **chique** , I’ll be leaving later Friday afternoon. I’ll be needing floorspace, or porchspace, so long as you can accomodate. . . Tripler I’m going bivouac if I have to . . . ---
**Author:** ![chique](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4491bb/32.png) [@chique](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chique)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2002, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/123 "2002-05-25T05:58:06Z")
Mmmm. Trip…either check your email, or email me with a better address. Floor/yard space is yours. Maybe even recliner/couch space if you talk to me nicely enough 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![imthjckaz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/imthjckaz/32/3223_2.png) [@imthjckaz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/imthjckaz)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2002, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/124 "2002-05-27T16:12:20Z")
Start spreading the news, can’t wait for the day You’ll want to be a part of it - PorkDope, PorkDope No city park rules, We’re going to play Right through the very heart of it - PorkDope, PorkDope We’re want to have pork, that doesn’t don’t taste like sheep And I’m gonna fill my plate with it - a big ol heap There will be plenty booze, we’ll be putting away We’re gonna make a show of it - at ol PorkDope If you can’t get drunk there, you can’t get drunk anywhere It’s up to you - PorkDope, PorkDope PorkDope, PorkDope Gonna to party allnight, don’t wanta sleep Gotta bring some money, check on the list, Gonna spend lot of it, that hotel’s not cheap Those little town blues, are melting away Gonna make some brand new friends at it - at old PorkDope If you can make them there, you’ll make 'em anywhere It’s up to you - PorkDope, PorkDooooooooppppe ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2002, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/125 "2002-05-27T20:01:34Z")
I just want to make sure that this pig was killed in a kashrut kitchen while blessed by a rabbi. I’m not sure if I can eat it otherwise. ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2002, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/126 "2002-05-27T23:38:49Z")
The pig is kosher. I dug out Leviticus 11:3 and 11:7 - “Whatsoever parteth the hoof, and is cloven-footed, and cheweth the cud, among the beasts, that shall ye eat” and “And the swine, because he parteth the hoof, and is cloven-footed, but cheweth not the cud, he is unclean to you.” The fourteenth chapter of Deuteronomy discusses this as well. So, I figured, why not get some genetic engineers on the job and splice some sheep DNA into it? The pig chews its cud, still has parteth of the hoof and cloven of the foot, and the lab promises me it tastes just like a pig. I figure Maimonides would okay this, don’t you think? ---
**Author:** ![Wisest\_Novel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wisest_novel/32/13329_2.png) [@Wisest\_Novel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wisest_Novel)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2002, 10:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/127 "2002-05-28T10:32:34Z")
FTR, I’m now a definite “yes” for PorkDope. lno, are you planning to put out an updated attendance list in the next couple of days? My names-faces memory being particularly poor, it’d help if I could review the guest list before I leave. I got a name wrong at the last ChiDope, and don’t want to suffer the same humiliation in MN. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2002, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/128 "2002-05-28T14:58:40Z")
That’s an awful lot of trouble you went through for me, lno. Thank you. If it’s not so much trouble, can you take off its two front legs and attach claws? I could really go for some spit fired rock lobster this weekend. ---
**Author:** ![rubes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@rubes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rubes)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2002, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/129 "2002-05-28T16:03:33Z")
LOL Rock Lobster ---
**Author:** ![malkavia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malkavia/32/5621_2.png) [@malkavia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/malkavia)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2002, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/130 "2002-05-29T16:28:28Z")
I leave in 24 hours. Ooonst! I just thought I’d bump this to remind lno to post an updated headcount sometime today. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2002, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/131 "2002-05-29T17:20:27Z")
I’m bringing two heads IYKWIM… ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2002, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/132 "2002-05-29T18:13:35Z")
Updated guest list:[ul][li]lno[_]Tripler[_]Ethilrist[_]The Punkyova[_]chique[_]Spider Woman[_]imthjckaz[_]Rysdad[_]Beadalin & husband[_]Jessica2[_]easy e[_]rubes[_]malkavia[_]thinksnow[_]Maeglin[_]JoeyHemlock[_]Canthearya[_]Ivar[_]Wisest Novel[_]Caldazar[_]absoul[_]Newton Meter[_]Enderw24[_]Maybe NurseCarmen and maybe BlackKnight[_]and as of last count twenty-six non-Dopers. I swear they won’t bite, except for the pig.[/ul]There will be sticky nametags available. One of these will be applied to the pig with the name Sir Oinks-A-Lot, and another will be applied to a tub of ice and beer with the name LonDope, to return the favor.[/li] Two of the non-Dopers will bring gazpacho soup. When they arrive, they intend to shout “Wait, everybody! You don’t have to eat meat! We brought gazpacho! It’s tomato soup, served ice cold!” Ideally, everyone present will shout “GO BACK TO RUSSIA!” at that point. Just letting you know. ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2002, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/133 "2002-05-29T19:24:02Z")
_Nervously_ Cecil the Bear is winging his way southward from Edmonton, having been dispatched through the mail last Friday. (Hung-over, apparently.) Destination: The Punkyova’s. I devoutly hope he’ll be able to attend the Pork-stravaganza. If any of y’all hear from Punkyova, ask her to e-mail me. I hope you get to meet the little guy; if you do, take pictures and put his nametag in his scrap book when he’s done with it. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2002, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/134 "2002-05-29T19:31:29Z")
Looks like I might be out - I think I’m playing golf with my Dad on the other end of town. (not a very counter culture thing, sorry to disappoint anyone). But since I promised chocolate, I will donate a chocolate cake, courtesy of Woullets, if someone promises to stop by 50th and France and pick it up. ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2002, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/135 "2002-05-29T19:47:22Z")
A chocolate cake, sitting on the corner of 50th and France all day, waiting for someone to come by and take it. Somehow I suspect that the Mpls Bomb Squad will be approaching that very cautiously. More details, **Dangerosa** , and I’ll send a feared lieutenant to pick it up. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2002, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/136 "2002-05-29T20:33:31Z")
I’ll e-mail you details. ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2002, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/137 "2002-05-30T19:53:47Z")
Forecast for Sat: Mostly sunny, high in the lower 80’s. nice. Sadly, I won’t be able to make a lingering visit, consider it a drive-by-doping. My wife wants to go to her mother’s land in Webster, WI. The Morel mushrooms are going like gang busters up there. Anyone ever hunt for morels? You haven’t had a mushroom until you’ve had a fresh morel. 'Tis a pity that I’ll have none to offer up for the hog. Please don’t be alarmed when I show up as a guy…you see the nick name arose from a local childrens’ show from the late sixties/early seventies. Nurse Carmen was a sweet woman that all the kids loved. When I started playing Quake on-line (local battles have the best ping rate/connection speed) I knew some of the locals would recall their sweet Carmen and not dare frag her. On the flip side, the humiliation of being fragged by their dear sweet Carmen also had an appeal. The name has stuck. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2002, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/138 "2002-05-31T03:49:14Z")
Fuel planning . . . check. Mission loadout completed . . . check. Nav plan . . . check. Time hack . . . check. Seems my truck is cocked and loaded for a stragegic PorkDope strike. I’ll be leaving after lunch tomorrow (from work), and should be at **chiques** sometime around the neighborhood of 9:PM. **Chique** , if you can, e-mail me a good phone number I can call with an ETA when I’m not too far out. Tripler Callsign ‘Keg Karrier One’. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2002, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/139 "2002-05-31T03:52:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lno \* > \*\*A chocolate cake, sitting on the corner of 50th and France all day, waiting for someone to come by and take it. Somehow I suspect that the Mpls Bomb Squad will be approaching that very cautiously. > > More details, **Dangerosa** , and I’ll send a feared lieutenant to pick it up. 🙂 \*\* Bomb? Chocolate cake? “Feared”?!? Damn skippy I’ll pick it up. Tripler I just wanted to say “damn skippy” at some point today . . . ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2002, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438/140 "2002-05-31T15:42:04Z")
Spanky the Wonder Dog has initiated Porkapalooza by eating two smoked and dried pig’s ears in the last 12 hours. THE HUNT … IS ON [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porkdope-2002-a-k-a-porkapalooza-june-1-mpls/97438.md?page=8)