# Porn discussions you can't really have with anyone else **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 11, 2001, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801 "2001-10-11T14:35:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![uberDave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f04885/32.png) [@uberDave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/uberDave)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/41 "2001-10-11T18:30:44Z")
What??? Peter North is dead? I had no idea. That’ll teach him to be a team player. I was in NYC in the spring of 1980 and saw **Caligula** at the Penthouse One movie theater with my then girlfriend. Was that Roddy McDowell playing the main character??? It was, to say the least, enlightening. Maybe somebody could use it as part of a History 101 project. As for a recommendation…if you can find it, try the orginal **Story of O**. Actually has a plot (well, sort of) and its beautifully filmed. FYI, its a story of submission. There should be more porn threads. ---
**Author:** ![Yondan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/278dde/32.png) [@Yondan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yondan)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/42 "2001-10-11T18:37:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by seawitch \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Sue Duhnym \* > > \*\*And I want to see Caligula, just because it’s sort of infamous. \*\* > > You know, **Sue** , I feel the same way. And everyone in this thread saying "Don’t… " just makes me want to see it all the more. I know I’ll regret it, but I gotta look. > > \*\* Seriously, you will regret it. There are far more useful and worthwhile things to do with your time. To uberDave: It was \*\* Malcolm \*\* Macdowell ---
**Author:** ![Cap\_n\_Crude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Cap\_n\_Crude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cap_n_Crude)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/43 "2001-10-11T18:49:17Z")
> [@](#): > > I was in NYC in the spring of 1980 and saw Caligula at the Penthouse One movie theater with my then girlfriend. Was that Roddy McDowell playing the main character??? EEEWWWWWWWWWWW!!! Malcolm. Malcolm McDowell. Roddy McDowell played Augustus in _Cleopatra_ with Liz Taylor. ---
**Author:** ![Formerly\_Bandersnatch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e36b37/32.png) [@Formerly\_Bandersnatch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Formerly_Bandersnatch)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/44 "2001-10-11T18:54:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by BurnMeUp \* > \*\*\*note just because i have posted 4 times in the porn thread, it does NOT make me a pervert! \*\* Absolutely NOT! Fortunately there are other standards that may apply. 😃 [sub]I know I don’t really know you, but I couldn’t resist. 🙂 [/sub] ---
**Author:** ![uberDave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f04885/32.png) [@uberDave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/uberDave)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/45 "2001-10-11T18:56:42Z")
Oops! Seem to have gotten the McDowell’s confused. It WAS a long time ago. Thank you for clearing that up. ---
**Author:** ![Fiddle\_Peghead](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fiddle_peghead/32/3506_2.png) [@Fiddle\_Peghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiddle_Peghead)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/46 "2001-10-11T19:18:51Z")
When I was growing up, one of the better known porn stars was Seka, a statuesque blond that my friends and I were all crazy about. There was always this rumor that she was from our hometown. I don’t think I was ever totally convinced of this. But this thread inspired me to try to find out. A quick google search has indeed confirmed that Seka was born in Radford, VA!!! I’m so thrilled. ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/47 "2001-10-11T19:31:04Z")
Finally, a spot to share my anecdote: Back in the late 80s/early 90s my then girlfriend and I watched a porn movie called **Sharon in the Rough House** wherein the lead character has sex with a black deaf mute with a 3rd leg. Anyway she sits there screaming in the movie “Ooohhhh, fuck me dummy! fuck me dummy!”. This was too hilarious to not become an inside joke. So for the next 3-4 months she would try to break my stride during sex by screaming out “oooohhhhhh! fuck my dummy!” to see if I could continue or if I would bust into fits of laughter. Usually it ended in laughter. ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/48 "2001-10-11T19:31:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pezpunk \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Superdude \* > > \*\* > > > > > [@](#): > > > > > > \*Originally posted by bobkitty \* > > > \*\*[sub]Though I’m a wee bit saddened to think I’ll never have a threesome with another guy. ☹ [/sub] \*\* > > > > Well, count me in if you’re looking for volunteers. \*\* > > You don’t miss a beat do you? \*\* I try not to. Never know when my volunteering’s actually going to be put to use. ---
**Author:** ![Legomancer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/779978/32.png) [@Legomancer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Legomancer)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/49 "2001-10-11T19:33:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by GingerOfTheNorth \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Legomancer \* > > **…If you run a porn site specializing in redheads, please understand that red pubic hair is part of if not most of the appeal. Hence, the models housl be appropriately attired. Shaving down there on a redhead defeats the whole flippin’ point.** > > I’ll remember that. No shaving. Gotcha.\*\* I should have specified COMPLETE shaving. No one objects to a little tidiness. ---
**Author:** ![Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/41988e/32.png) [@Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tequila_Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/50 "2001-10-11T19:45:15Z")
I second Sue’s recommendation of Michael Ninn. My favorite of his is Latex, though the Divas series is good, and Fade To Blue was worth watching too. Just enough plot to move along to the next scene of attractive people having sex with none of those annoying “count the pores in their skin” extreme close-ups. I’ve always wanted to see Cafe Flesh. Anyone here seen it? Is it as good as I’ve heard? A porn movie with an actual honest to goodness decent storyline? ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/51 "2001-10-11T20:18:10Z")
I wish I could convince my wife to watch enough porn to have porn experiences, much less porn discussions… ---
**Author:** ![Formerly\_Bandersnatch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e36b37/32.png) [@Formerly\_Bandersnatch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Formerly_Bandersnatch)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/52 "2001-10-11T20:42:41Z")
I just realized that maybe this is the place to ask this question. Several years ago I saw a porn flick that I found rather intriquing. A woman had a husband that traveled a lot, but was always home for her birthday. One birthday he didn’t make it, and she someone discovered his traveling always involved other women. She decided to explore her sexuality, in many many ways. 🙂 I believe that the movie was made in India, but that’s about all I know. Does anyone recognize it? ---
**Author:** ![plnnr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@plnnr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plnnr)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/53 "2001-10-11T21:25:59Z")
It sounds suspiciously like “The Mahatma’s Hot Mama,” but I could be mistaken, or I could just be making that up. Andrew Blake’s movies always seemed the best of a bad lot, IMHO. “Nightdreams,” with Torri Welles seemed to be the best of them. ---
**Author:** ![galen\_ubal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/galen_ubal/32/4440_2.png) [@galen\_ubal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/galen_ubal)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/54 "2001-10-11T22:16:01Z")
I’ll second the Andrew BLake recomendation, though I would put “House of Dreams” first - very 80’s mood and set design. ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/55 "2001-10-11T23:16:02Z")
I got one with Sly in it, called the Italian Stallion, its so funny. At my college, UCSD they used to show Deep Throat once a yar & put up big banners. I dont think they do that anymore. ---
**Author:** ![dpr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8797f3/32.png) [@dpr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dpr)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/56 "2001-10-11T23:37:31Z")
I had an old one (called Perfect Fit I think) that I hadn’t touched in years and rediscovered a few years back. Pretty poor and wouldn’t be worht mentioning except for the fact that the main actor HAS to be Jerry Seinfeld. The looks, mannerisms, quirks… sheesh Talk about your ‘stand-up’ comedian… ---
**Author:** ![Booker57](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Booker57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Booker57)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/57 "2001-10-12T00:08:40Z")
Dixie Ray, Hollywood Star. A plot, decent writing and acting, good lighting. An all round “good” film. It was a period piece set in the Fourty’s. They used proper sets and props. The men were dressed in old style suits and even wore hats! The woman wore skirts and stockings with garter belts, not for the sex aspect, but just because that was the style back then. I did like this film. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/58 "2001-10-12T01:09:35Z")
The wife and I dig Michael Ninn as well: stylish and sexy. I especially enjoy how he makes sure to let the women enjoy themselves. (Seriously. If you’re paying attention, it’s amazing how many “conventional” straight porno directors think it’s sufficient to have the woman moan and groan a bit while getting fucked and then grin while taking a load in the face. Booooring.) Ninn almost invariably gives the woman at least one shouting climax, which increases the heat immeasurably. Also, he has a subtle technique he uses in some movies where the soundtrack is detached from the visuals; the viewer sees the woman onscreen as strong and totally in charge, but hears the woman’s unrestrained, thought-erasing moans on the soundtrack. In other words, it’s a subconscious thing, where the woman knows what she wants and how to get it, and yet is still able to let herself go and enjoy it fully. It makes for a nice combination of feminist actualization with the secret “inner whore” thing, in my opinion. However, if you want something on the kinkier side, look for the director Pierre Woodman. He somehow manages to achieve the balance of being dirty without going all the way into uncomfortably sleazy. (If that’s what you’re looking for, check out Frank Thring.) Plus a Woodman bonus is that he works in both French and English. His _Pyramid_ series, in particular, is scorchingly hot. And if you don’t speak French but your partner does (or vice versa), you can enjoy the participatory element of doing a running translation of all the incredibly dirty chatter. Now, as far as _Caligula_ goes, yeah, it definitely has a huge measure of notoriety. It’s one of those things that makes a film buff (or a porn buff) feel incomplete if s/he hasn’t seen it. So, despite how people like me will tell you that it’s not worth it, it’s boring, it’s stupid, it deserves at least part of its reputation because it’s a horrible film but there isn’t anything else to recommend it, you still feel, even in the face of all of this naysaying, as though you ought to watch it at some point in your life, and nothing in Heaven or on Earth will change your mind. When you’re done, you’ll shake your head and say everybody was right, it wasn’t worth it, and you’ll try to convince other _Caligula_ virgins of exactly the same things that you dismissed before you saw it. But even knowing this, you will be unable to resist the urge to watch it and see for yourself what the fuss is about. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. The logical extension of this, of course, is that everybody in the world will eventually see it. How pathetic is that? ---
**Author:** ![Nacho4Sara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Nacho4Sara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nacho4Sara)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/59 "2001-10-12T02:29:09Z")
I was the first of my friends to turn 18 many, many (okay, 2.5) years ago, so of course I had to rent the porn. We went to “Videos R Us,” the only rental place we found with the infamous black curtain. So I filled out the form, got my temp card, and all was well. So me, Kenny (who’s gay), and Gladys start working our way to the curtain. We kept getting close, but then we’d freak and go back to the new releases. Finally, Kenny pulled the edge of the curtain back a little, and gestured for me to go first. Well, I bum-rushed the door like a linebacker and slammed directly into a Rack O’ Porn. Yes, you can just picture it: I bodyslammed a giant, 7 foot tall shelf of porn and almost every video fell to the floor. I fell too, and Kenny barely stopped the entire shelf from crashing into me, but I did get beaned in the head with some pornos, anyway. Of course, we attracted a LOT of attention. My response: I broke into hysteric gales of laughter. You know the kind - you’re crying, guffawing madly, snorting, snot’s running from your nose, you can’t breathe, and your chest hurts. Kenny and Gladys kept telling me to hush, but there I was _surrounded_ by porn and spectators and I could not control myself. I thought I was going to pass out, I was laughing so hysterically. The store manager wandered over and started cleaning up, with Kenny and Gladys’s help. They were still not laughing, whereas I just rolled around, helpless to do anything but laugh. Eventually I got control of myself and helped them pick everything up. After that ice-breaker, we rented “Swinging Singles” and a gay porn for Kenny. The hot young Latin stallion on the cover turned out to be like 55 years old, and the former video was shot in 1970 and had some interested pool scenes. Anyway, now I own one, left over from an old boyfriend. It’s called “Ravishing Royalty,” and it’s funny more than anything. The actresses have these awful British accents and horrible couture-wannabe dresses. The rocking limo scene is pretty cool, though. There’s an Arab millionaire, an actor in a pirate costume (don’t ask me), the horse trainer dude, two other royal chicks, and a threesome with two dudes. It’s okay, but I’d rather just read the stories in Playboy and use my imagination, ifyaknowwhati’msayin’. I agree with Pezzy: porn good. It both delights AND instructs. I’m sure John Dryden would be proud. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Doobieous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/da6949/32.png) [@Doobieous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doobieous)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/60 "2001-10-12T03:56:02Z")
Just a couple of comments 🙂 I have several gay porns and the stupidest/funniest one is called “Stories of the Homo Patrol”. It’s set up like COPS, but instead of busting criminals they bust guy’s cherries. I cant watch the parts where theyre “out on patrol” because the dialogue is so stupid. The next one i have is called “Hot Lunch” It’s from 1984, and one of the guys in it looks like a tom of finland character. I swear this film must have been shot on Hi8 (or whatever those home cameras are that had real film). The dialogue so does not match up with what the actors are saying on film. They also tend to replay the cumshot scenes several times to “extend” them. The film was filmed before the industry started making actors wear condoms. I like it because i find several of the actors in it pretty hot despite the bad early 80’s hair. My novelty porn is one made by an amateur which features him giving head and taking up the ass this massive penis. Supposedly the penis is 10 inches long and looks to be as thick as a beer can. The penis is so huge, it’s even impressive flaccid. You can actually see the guy gag and spit when the other guy forces the guy’s head onto his penis. It’s more strange than arousing really. And for porn with the least amount of dialogue, i have a film called “Morning, Noon, and Night”. It’s good for just seeing pure sex, and the guys are all pretty hot. But i think there’s only 6 words spoken total: “I have to take a shower”. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801.md?page=4)