# Porn discussions you can't really have with anyone else **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 11, 2001, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801 "2001-10-11T14:35:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![plnnr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@plnnr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plnnr)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/81 "2001-10-15T16:32:21Z")
I didn’t intend to imply that Peter North was dead. I said that had he been alive at the time of the Great Chicago Fire, he could have put it out all by himself with his prodigous…ah…output. In retrospect, they may have just let the city burn. I read recently that he claims to have developed an herbal dietary supplement that will allow you, too, to produce more…ah…output. He went on to say that he’ll start production of it when he retires from the business. Until then, he wants to make sure that his gimmick stay uniquely his own. ---
**Author:** ![Kabbal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Kabbal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kabbal)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/82 "2001-10-15T17:08:50Z")
Had some network problems and didn’t think it went through. ---
**Author:** ![DarkWriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee59a6/32.png) [@DarkWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarkWriter)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/83 "2001-10-15T17:28:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Geobabe \* > \*\*Now that I’m back on a crappy dial-up connection, I can’t surf porn the way I used to. In my cruises around the net, I found an awful lot of sites with lovely men, but just about all of them were Playgirl style–flaccid penises don’t do a whole hell of a lot for me, y’know? Or they were gay sites. Not that I have anything against gay porn–hell, porn is porn, baby, but it would be nice to find something aimed toward my tastes. Anyone know of any good sites geared toward het women? \*\* Try here: [http://pcforwomen.com/](http://pcforwomen.com/) “City Men” might be what you’re looking for. Not that _I_ go looking for porn or anything. 🙂 Sheri ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/84 "2001-10-15T18:00:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DarkWriter \* > \*\* Try here: > > [http://pcforwomen.com/](http://pcforwomen.com/) > > “City Men” might be what you’re looking for. > > Not that _I_ go looking for porn or anything. 🙂 > > Sheri \*\* Hello, boys! Thank you very much. ---
**Author:** ![psiekier](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/psiekier/32/116_2.png) [@psiekier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psiekier)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/85 "2001-10-15T18:49:45Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Trion \* > \*\*At this point I’d like to open the floor for recommendations. Movies, books, whatever. \*\* Sure. The best X-rated movie, IMHO, is _The Dinner Party_. There is a sequel, but I haven’t bothered to see it. Good stuff:[ul][li]Stuff directed by Michael Ninn or Andrew Blake. They are generally somewhat artistic, but very hot.[_]If you like it hard and heavy, just about anything with Rocco Siffredi as the star is good. Women worship this guy for a reason.[_]Believe it or not, Seymour Butts actually films some good movies. They’re rather disjointed, and of course there’s no plot, but he and Shane do have a way of getting in trouble with the sexiest women![/ul]Bad stuff:[ul][_]Anything directed by Jim Holliday. This guy needs to get a clue.[_]Anything that prominently features Joey (now “Joel”) Silvera or Ron Jeremy, unless you’re looking for a laugh. C’mon, guys, the 70’s are over.[\*]Other washed-up stars trying to make a come-back who weren’t that great to begin with - chiefly folks like Victoria Paris, Teri Weigel, and Tori Welles.[/ul]If you’ve got an open mind, you might try reading Anne Rice’s _Exit to Eden_. You’ll find it easier to swallow if you haven’t seen the movie first.[/li][QUOTE] _Originally posted by racinchikki_ **Er… color me ignorant, but what’s the deal with _Caligula_? The only one I’ve ever heard of is the Roman guy…** [/quote] The deal stems from the age-old question of “has anybody famous done porn?” _Barbarella_ and _Party at Kitty and Stud’s_ notwithstanding, the answer is “no.” … unless you want to count _Caligula_ (and most people don’t). In the 70’s, _Penthouse_ publisher Bob Guccione tricked several well-known actors, including Malcolm McDowell, Sir John Gielgud, and Peter O’Toole (snicker!) into being filmed for what they thought was going to be a drama about the life of the mad Roman Emperor, Caligula. Their scenes were filmed apart from the X-rated madness that makes up the rest of the film, and they had no idea they were cast in an adult film until it was all edited together and released. > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by OxyMoron_ > **Plus, thanks to Viagra there are no fluffers anymore.** That’s not necessarily true. Just ask Annabelle Chong or Houston! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![maikai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/53a042/32.png) [@maikai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/maikai)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/86 "2002-07-23T05:54:51Z")
This seems like a good place to asks this: In an episode of South Park, they show a clip of gay porn (of course the sex wasn’t shown.) Does anyone know what it is. Sorry, I don’t have any good porn anecdotes but I’ll try. When I was in sixth grade I saw my first porno. It really grossed me out. Boy things sure have changed! Also, when I bought new porn, I would throw out my old porn because I was too embarrassed to have a lot of porn. Now I wish I had it back ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Fiddle\_Peghead](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fiddle_peghead/32/3506_2.png) [@Fiddle\_Peghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiddle_Peghead)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2002, 7:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/87 "2002-07-23T07:50:27Z")
Well, porn comments, don’t get me started! I like Ed Powers, Jake Steed, and of course, the great series “Gag Factor”. Anybody else seen this? The highlights are women laying down with their heads upside down, and the guy inserting his… well, you get the idea. I love raunchy porn. Anybody else? ---
**Author:** ![WSLer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a6a055/32.png) [@WSLer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WSLer)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2002, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/88 "2002-07-24T00:02:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by psiekier \* > \*\*The deal stems from the age-old question of “has anybody famous done porn?” _Barbarella_ and _Party at Kitty and Stud’s_ notwithstanding, the answer is “no.” \*\* Actually Spaulding Gray was in a porno, in a “performing role” no less 😛 back in the 1970’s. Can’t remember the name of the movie. My best friend Kevin was in a frat up at Carnegie Mellon and Chad, who was one of his frat brothers, his father was the distributor for magazines like Cheri, CHIC, Club etc. So, there were always mags and videos around the frat house. One night they all settled in to a wtach a movie…about 15 minutes in, there was a cut to a bedroom with a man and a woman, with the man “putting the shoes” to the woman. All of a sudden Chad leaps up and put his foot through the TV. The couple on the tape were his mom & dad.:eek: :eek: :eek: :smack: :smack: :smack: Whoops. I am under the firm belief that porn has kept the stockings and garter belt industries in business for the last 20 years, 'cause the only place you see them is in pornos. ---
**Author:** ![peasea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bc79bd/32.png) [@peasea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peasea)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2002, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/89 "2002-07-24T01:58:22Z")
> [@](#): > > I can’t remember the featured actress, but she was big-time (and I think she later became a producer). The guy? Well, if it wasn’t Tony Danza, it sure as hell looked like Tony Danza Are you talking about Marylin Chambers in Insatiable? Pool table scene? I’ve heard this mentioned before, that the guy looks _just_ like Tony Danza. I don’t get it. I’ve seen this movie a bunch (did I just say that?) and I just don’t see it. Your mileage may vary, I guess. Henry Paris (it is Henry, not Harry, right?) is great! Barbara Broadcast just cracks me up with its restaraunt scenes (“excuse me, would you mind if I blow your waiter? I can’t seem to find mine”). What other porn director would use the line, “Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me”? Anyone but me like the Dark Bros.? Now those were some fucked up people. If you ever meet anyone that claims drugs weren’t rampant in the porn industry, just show 'em New Wave Hookers or DMJ III. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2002, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/90 "2002-07-24T02:27:13Z")
I don’t watch porn, but I DO like reading Star Wars fan fiction-including the smutty, NC-17 variety. (I’ve also attempted to write some on my own). Anyhoo, I came across a female slash one-Leia/Jaina. For those of you aren’t fans of Star Wars, or who don’t read the books, Jaina is Princess Leia’s and Han Solo’s daughter. I clicked on it, thinking, this HAS to be a fucking joke, right? No, it was not. _shudder_ ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2002, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/91 "2002-07-24T02:48:43Z")
[Here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=92464&highlight=caligula) is the _Caligula_ thread from Cafe Society. Maybe we should have a big Dopefest and rent it? ---
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2002, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/92 "2002-07-24T20:18:43Z")
I don’t like porn where guys have no pubes. I kind of like Czech & Russian twinkie porn. And here’s my someone-I-know-in-porn story: I was surfing for porn a couple of years ago and came across a site that featured live gay sex. I had slept with one of the guys about a year earlier. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2002, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/93 "2002-07-24T20:33:29Z")
Oh - and my first experience with hardcore: When I was 13, a friend invited a bunch of guys over to his place at lunchtime. He had found his parents’ copy of _Debbie Does Dallas_. Anyway, he pops the tape in, and the first thing I see (it hadn’t been rewound) some fat guy’s hairy butthole as he pokes some cheerleader’s cooter. I was like “Holy SHIT!” I wasn’t expecting anything that explicit. I think the guy wanted a circle-jerk, which would have been fun, looking back, but no one did anything. Damn. ---
**Author:** ![Winnie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e480ec/32.png) [@Winnie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winnie)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2002, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/94 "2002-07-24T21:30:34Z")
oh oh! This is my chance to tell my “corn porn” story. Last summer Mr. Winnie & I rented a beach cottage with some friends on the Outer Banks (NC). One friend decided he couldn’t bear to not have his Dish there for the week since the cottage didn’t have cable, so he brought it with us. He’s quite tech-savvy and manages to get all the channels without paying for them if you know what I mean. Porn is his favorite. One night we’re playing poker, getting pretty toasted and we had the porn on the tv in the background. At one point there’s a break in the game and we watch the porn for a moment… there’s silence for a brief second and I say “is he f\*cking her with a CORN COB?” The answer, of course, is yes. The best part comes the next day. We’re at a little local crab shack getting some steamed crabs, mussels, clams, whatnot. There’s a giant blackboard behind the register with all the “catch of the day” stuff, side dishes, etc. written on it. Underneath the side dish “corn on the cob” it reads in tiny letters “Where’d that corn cob come from?” We all saw it at once as we read down the menu and all gasped in unison, then burst into the most uncontrollable laughter. I mean, either that was just a BIZARRE coincidence or one of their younger employees shucking oysters in the back saw the same porn we did the night before and decided to have some fun. The couple that owned the shack appeared to be about 95-years old and definitely weren’t up on what we were pissing our pants laughing about. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2002, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/95 "2002-07-25T02:40:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by scott evil \* > \*\*Anyway, he pops the tape in, and the first thing I see (it hadn’t been rewound) some fat guy’s hairy butthole as he pokes some cheerleader’s cooter. I was like “Holy SHIT!” I wasn’t expecting anything that explicit. > \*\* This exact same thing happened to me! First time I saw porn was at a friend’s house when I was 13. He started it up and it was right in the middle of some hardcore S&M close-up shot in which a very ( **very** ) ugly man is simultaneously fucking and hitting with a strap the pussy of a very ugly woman. I nearly lost my lunch. All the while my brain is screaming at my penis “THIS is what you want to do?? Are you crazy??” (shudder) ---
**Author:** ![Sengkelat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@Sengkelat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sengkelat)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2002, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/96 "2002-07-25T17:22:59Z")
I remember watching many of the _Hawaii Vice_ series. My housemate kept renting them…they starred Kascha, a blond asian woman, which he was fond of. She’s not bad looking, but she can’t act to save her life. There’s a scene where she’s watching porn (it’s the director’s excuse to throw in a completely unrelated scene) and she says “This video is getting me a little excited” but says it in such a way that screams “I’m reading off a teleprompter, and I’m illiterate.” In a later movie, there’s a girl-girl scene where one actress is spanking the other’s vulva, and the spankee says “Punish my clitty. It’s been a bad clitty.” It makes me wonder, what did it do? Can a body part really be bad on its own? The first porno I saw was called _Cum All Over_. A friend had gotten it as a freebie, and she thought it was silly so she gave the tape to me. I left it in her boyfriend’s car when we went to dinner with friends, and she delighted telling them, without context, “Jon has _Cum All Over_ in his car. It’s Sengkelat’s.” My favorite porno is _Captured Beauty_. My housemate runs a web-based porn DVD shop, so he brought a few Andrew Blake videos home at Mrs. Sengkelat’s request. _Captured Beauty_ is pretty much dialogue-free, and in a series of vignettes it sort of tells the tale of a woman brought to a b&d pleasure mansion and, well, pleasured. It’s really well filmed, all the women are gorgeous (oh, it’s all women) and it doesn’t have a lot of genital close-ups, which I find pretty non-sexy. By the way, I’m pretty sure “porn” is a collective noun, like “rice.” You wouldn’t say “I ate a rice,” the same way you wouldn’t say “I saw a porn.” If you want the singular, you’d either say “I saw a porn video” or “I saw a porno.” But that’s perhaps just my own grammatical freakishness. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2002, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/97 "2002-07-25T17:45:40Z")
Porn and me don’t get along. You see I’ve have had nothing but bad expierences with porn movies. 1 While in HS my brother comes up with the idea that after a basketball game instead of going for pizza with everyone else we go to the porn theatre that was near our school. A friend comes with the two of us. My brother, whose life is dictated by guilt, decides that after the ‘fun’ of going into this dark skanky place with very scary old men in there we need to be punished so he loses the car keys. We are about 20 miles from home and it’s 2 am. Our friend goes back to his car at the school and goes home. No we can’t spend the night at his place. You do not know desperation till you crawl on the floor of a porn theatre looking for car keys. We end up calling home and waking up mom and dad to ask them to bring us the spare keys to us at the porn theatre. 2 A year later some of my friends want to go to the theatre and I tell them it isn’t any fun at all but they dont’ believe me and we go. They charge us 6 bucks to get in. (dems 1982 dollars) and then five minutes later throw us out for being underage and don’t give us our money back. What are we going to do? Call the cops? 3 Years later a friend invites me to join him and his friends for a superbowl party. However the tradition at this party is for the host to have a porn show halftime. Fair enough but, the host also tries to get the most unusual/disturbing porn he can find. I threw up. So I dont’ really like porn movies. ---
**Author:** ![Wolfian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7ea924/32.png) [@Wolfian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolfian)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2002, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/98 "2002-07-25T19:42:42Z")
I just bought the worst porn. The girl is extremely hot, but all she does is play with stockings (it was, I realized about a quarter of the way though, a stocking fetish film). Grrr. That’s what I get for picking out of the no-name bargin bin. ---
**Author:** ![Tiburon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e36b37/32.png) [@Tiburon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tiburon)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2002, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/99 "2002-07-25T21:49:01Z")
I was getting ready to move and had been going through video tapes to see what was on the unlabeled ones. Sure enough, one was a porno. No biggie. The next morning, I got up to go to work and grabbed a tape to return it to Hollywood Video (Chocolat). Dropped it off, went home, blah blah, everything normal. Then I’m on the phone with my SO and I noticed that Chocolat was sitting on top of the television. I blinked. Then I realized that **I had returned the porno to Hollywood Video.** I was seriously ready to die. I called and said that my friends had played a joke on me and could I please bring by the correct movie so I didn’t get charged. One guy said, “Hey, is that you in there??” I said, “NO - it isn’t a HOME MOVIE.” They got a HUGE kick out of it and when I came to drop off the movie, I simply slid the Chocolat container box across the counter without looking anyone in the eye. A guy pushed back the porno tape and said, “We rewound it for you.” COULD I PLEASE DIE NOW? Tibs. ---
**Author:** ![Fretburner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@Fretburner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretburner)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2002, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801/100 "2002-07-26T00:29:00Z")
Heh. Anal Sexpert and columnist **Tristan Taurmino** (sp?) I’m guessing? > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Candlemas \* > \*\*I was just browsing around in an adult book store once, just looking at all the video box covers, when all of a sudden, “Hey, waitaminute! That’s my landlord’s daughter!” > > No joke. And she wasn’t just a featured performer, oh no! The actual title included her real name, as in “Candlemas’s Landlord’s Daughter presents Blank Blank Blank”. She wrote, produced and starred in this thing. The apparent main focus of the picture was the, um, butt. > > Needless to say I bought it (it was really expensive!) and brought it home. I couldn’t believe my eyes. Here I was watching this girl that I had socialized with on several occasions getting it every which way from Sunday. The movie ends with a dozen and a half person gang-bang focused on her. About five or six guys dropped their loads on the very cheek I had kissed goodbye in a friendly manner. > > I could never look at her or her mom the same way after that. I’m telling you, you would never guess she was in pornos to look at her. Later I found out that she has quite a following as a sex expert in certain circles and even writes a weekly column. You just never do know about people. \*\* [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/porn-discussions-you-cant-really-have-with-anyone-else/86801.md?page=4)