# Portland feds: Why not lay siege upon them? **URL:** \ **Category:** Politics & Elections\ **Created:** [July 25, 2020, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346 "2020-07-25T22:00:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2020, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/1 "2020-07-25T22:00:02Z")
Where are the federal “police” (or whatever they technically are) camping while they enjoy their visit to Beautiful Downtown Portland? Are some or all of them local residents, or at least within the state? Are some or most of them imported from elsewhere in the country? Where do they sleep? Where do they eat? Where do they get their supplies of tear gas and pepper balls? Do they have a massive stockpile there in the federal courthouse? How about the local and state police lay siege to them? Instead of tearing down the barricades around the court, enforce them instead. Keep the feds inside. Don’t let any food or other supplies in. Cut off the electricity, water, and whatever other utilities are there. Put a ring of local police, state police, protesters, moms and dads around the perimeter. Settle in for the long haul and just wait. Would that be (a) doable? (b) effective? (No, discobot, my topic is not similar to “Using a cell phone from US within UK”) ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2020, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/2 "2020-07-25T22:08:25Z")
I hear a lot of them are being put up at the downtown Marriott, which is quite large and houses lots of not-federal-asshole people so probably not a great target overall. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2020, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/3 "2020-07-25T22:13:27Z")
Could the local PTB then put some pressure on said Marriott to kick them out? Or, when they go to the courthouse during the day, then keep them there and not let them out? Where are their stockpiles of gas, pepper, rubber bullets, real bullets, etc.? Can the local authorities prevent them from acquiring more? Lay siege around the airport if supplies are being flown in? Can they lay siege around the Marriott, allowing other guests in and out but not the feds? Can they keep them in? Can they keep them out? ---
**Author:** ![DinoR](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dinor/32/2821_2.png) [@DinoR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DinoR)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2020, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/4 "2020-07-25T22:45:46Z")
A good answer to “Why not?” is that almost all of these suggestion are blatantly illegal. They are blatant in a way that the actions of those federal agents are not. ---
**Author:** ![pool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pool/32/4152_2.png) [@pool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pool)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2020, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/5 "2020-07-25T22:50:26Z")
They did attempt to barricade them inside the federal courthouse and peacefully attempt to light the building on fire with them trapped inside. ---
**Author:** ![Hatchie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hatchie/32/3983_2.png) [@Hatchie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hatchie)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2020, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/6 "2020-07-26T00:35:23Z")
From what I understand, they are all Truant Officers on leave from chasing down the Little Rascals when they play hooky. They don’t eat, they don’t sleep. All their incendiary supplies are from a fireworks store in Hooksett, New Hampshire. And if they catch you, you’re going to Reform School! ---
**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2020, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/7 "2020-07-26T01:19:25Z")
I’m 100% sure this is why the internet doesn’t get to solve real-world problems. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2020, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/8 "2020-07-26T02:38:52Z")
Again, if the state tired this, it would be deemed a act of insurrection, trump would declare martial law, suspend habeas corpus , and of course cancel the election. This is the fourth thread where somebody wants to try a act of illegal violence vs the Federal government. All these ideas are super bad. The courts are the only recourse, or just getting the protestors to stop. ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2020, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/9 "2020-07-26T04:14:14Z")
How did Fort Sumter work out in the end? ---
**Author:** ![Asuka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Asuka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asuka)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2020, 9:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/10 "2020-07-26T09:08:06Z")
From the same great SDMB minds that brought you “Everyone who listens to Joe Rogan should be sent to reeducation camps after Biden is elected” ---
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2020, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/11 "2020-07-26T13:46:57Z")
Yeah, “laying seige” as the OP puts it, is a really, really bad idea. At that point, you’re just giving Trump an excuse to send in actual troops. But, are there are other ways the locals can fuck with them, like finding out where they park their vehicles, slashing their tires, sticking potatoes in the tailpipes, putting sugar in the gas tanks, etc.? Maybe set up huge speakers outside their hotel and blast death metal at all hours of the night. ---
**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2020, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/12 "2020-07-26T15:32:07Z")
> [@octopus](#): > > How did Fort Sumter work out in the end? Your side lost. Badly. Very badly. ---
**Author:** ![madsircool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madsircool/32/3432_2.png) [@madsircool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madsircool)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2020, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/13 "2020-07-26T15:33:23Z")
And then the government agents could sneakily stick Trump 2020 bumper stickers on the back of protesters cars and watch other protesters destroy said cars. 🥳 😌 ---
**Author:** ![CaptMurdock](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/captmurdock/32/11736_2.png) [@CaptMurdock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CaptMurdock)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2020, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/14 "2020-07-26T19:10:17Z")
Send the feds holed up in the Marriott room service dosed with epicac and laxatives. ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2020, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/15 "2020-07-27T00:34:22Z")
It’s not my side. You shouldn’t slander people. Find me one post of mine where I’ve been in favor of secession or the Confederacy. ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2020, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/16 "2020-07-27T00:36:32Z")
So what happens when people retaliate? You make it seem like police and others CAN’T do anything. Not that they aren’t doing anything. At some point if you provoke enough violence public opinion changes against you. Right now, protesters of peace are getting away with a lot of violence but that won’t be tolerated for ever. ---
**Author:** ![CaptMurdock](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/captmurdock/32/11736_2.png) [@CaptMurdock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CaptMurdock)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2020, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/17 "2020-07-28T18:08:48Z")
> [@octopus](#): > > At some point if you provoke enough violence public opinion changes against you. And that’s what the feds should be worried about, and stop provoking enough violence. ---
**Author:** ![BippityBoppityBoo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bippityboppityboo/32/5745_2.png) [@BippityBoppityBoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BippityBoppityBoo)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2020, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/18 "2020-07-30T02:39:33Z")
> [@CaptMurdock](#): > > Send the feds holed up in the Marriott room service dosed with epicac and laxatives. did you mean _ipecac_, the emetic to induce vomiting after suspected poisoning? Or epicac, the Kurt Vonnegut short story? Either would work, actually, just wondering… ---
**Author:** ![CaptMurdock](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/captmurdock/32/11736_2.png) [@CaptMurdock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CaptMurdock)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2020, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/19 "2020-07-30T04:41:31Z")
Making the feds read Vonnegut?? That might be too cruel. 🤣 I thought Epicac was the same of a supercomputer KV wrote in one of his stories. YMMV. ---
**Author:** ![BippityBoppityBoo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bippityboppityboo/32/5745_2.png) [@BippityBoppityBoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BippityBoppityBoo)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2020, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346/20 "2020-07-30T04:53:00Z")
If you made me read Vonnegut, I’d likely throw up. We are both right-EPICAC was the name of the computer in Vonnegut’s short story titled “EPICAC”. I could have done better with my capitalization, but then so could have you. :snark: so, which did you intend to do, make them barf uncontrollably or run screaming from their hotel rooms? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/portland-feds-why-not-lay-siege-upon-them/916346.md?page=2)