# Post 5000 -or- Thanking My Imaginary Friends

**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [April 9, 2002, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698 "2002-04-09T17:27:19Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1

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### Author: ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)
#### Post date: [April 9, 2002, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/1 "2002-04-09T17:27:19Z")

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I have spent a good part of the past two years hanging around the SDMB. It’s time to thank some of the people I met along the way and mention some who have touched my life. If I left you out don’t take it personally. The order is only purposeful for the first few entries. After that it gets random.

**Ed Zotti** - Without you there’d be no reason for all of this. It was your column and your books that first drew me into this world.

**The Chicago Reader** - Without **The Reader** we would be all be wise-ass Cliff Clavens hanging out at neighborhood bars without others of our own kind. Especially Ed.

**Eve** , **Aha** , and **OpalCat** - The only people with whom I was familiar before I started here and whose presence made staying here seem almost respectable. Also **Eve** for allowing this unabashed fan to become a friend.

**The Attractive Redheads** - Had there been no thread devoted to you I probably wouldn’t have stuck around. **Shayna** and **Persephone** flirted with me and I discovered **Scotticher** , the nicest person I have ever known. You ladies ruined my life. Thank you.

**The Mods** - Without you Ed would have had to run the whole thing himself and I think we know how long THAT would have lasted.

**Polycarp** - Who taught me that it is okay to be a seeker. One of the wisest people I know.

**Porcupine** and **ValerieBlaise** ChiDope organizers extraordinaire, who helped me meet SDMB people in real life and pulled away the curtain of unreality surrounding you people, forcing me to relate to you all as actual human beings.

**Anthracite** and **Fierra** - Who gave me an online home where I can crash when this virtual tavern gets to be too much.

**MikeG** , **DynoSaur** , **Joey Hemlock** and **Sua Sponte** - My ChiFest buddies who are kinda like the RL guy friends I keep insisting I don’t have.

**Fenris** - The kid breaks me up.

**GaWd** - He pisses me off sometimes, but reminds me that civilized people can learn to put aside their differences in the interest of Getting Along.

**The Irish Dopers** - How an entire nation is so ably represented by a group as uniformly intelligent, reasonable, and fun says a lot about it. My great grandparents made a mistake leaving Eire. Okay, that was a lie since the mid- to late-19th century was an EXCELLENT time to leave.

**The Antipodean Dopers** - Much the same can be said about them with the bonus that I can say “Antipodean.” Yes, I say it aloud whenever I type it.

**The ChiDopers** - You embarass me whenever I’m with you. Then I embarass myself. Thank you for dragging me, kicking and screaming, from my shell.

**robinc308** , **Caught@Work** , **heresiarch** , **DPWhite** - The people who were pretended they were interested enough in my 5000th post to actually post their suggestions as to how to use it. As they can see, I didn’t pay much attention to their suggestions. 😉 - However, is is in MPSIMS and I will be honored to flirt with the lovely **robinc308** at a more appropriate time, like . . . right . . . now. Your beauty lights the southern skies!

**tiggeril** - By being my virtual daughter she has taken the pressure off my RL daughters to succeed in directions they haven’t chosen. Whatever they do I can say, “My virtual daughter is an Econ major at the University of Chicago.”

**Dagan Nuncamagica** - My oldest daughter (who doesn’t post here, wasting HER time at Sugar Quill) who is the only person in my real life who understands us enough that I can talk about you.

**techchick68** - When I started here she SO TOTALLY reminded me of someone else I nearly actually ruined my life over that I had to get to know her better. I’m glad I did.

**CrankyAsAnOldMan** - Because that name is so wrong!

**Chique** - Because loving me is such an attractive quality!

**vix** - For teaching me that flirting does not (automatically) make me evil.

**G Nome** - For making me feel special because I usually understand her (she’s a “her,” right?) and often agree.

**Dinsdale** and **Humble Servant** - Because it’s always good to know some lawyers licensed to practice in your state.

I am sure there are many I haven’t gotten to, but **Gundy** just claimed she’s not photogenic. By signing up with this outfit I swore to fight ignorance in all its forms. I rarely bother, that battle better handled by other, more intelligent and better educated Dopers, but if I know anything it’s Beautiful Women.

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### Author: ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)
#### Post date: [April 9, 2002, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/2 "2002-04-09T17:34:55Z")

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That’s a damnable amount of time to waste on the Internet, my friend.

- The Pot  
[sub]Great to meet you this weekend![/sub]

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### Author: ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)
#### Post date: [April 9, 2002, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/3 "2002-04-09T20:36:19Z")

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Awww. now you ruined the surpise . . . I was planning your 5000-post party, and ALL of the above-mentioned Dopers were to jump nekkid out of one huge cake.

But now that the cat’s out of the bag, I guess I’ll just call everyone up and tell 'em to get dresed again . . .

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### Author: ![Humble\_Servant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/47e85d/32.png) [@Humble\_Servant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Humble_Servant)
#### Post date: [April 9, 2002, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/4 "2002-04-09T20:38:29Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by dropzone \*  
> **Dinsdale and Humble Servant - Because it’s always good to know some lawyers licensed to practice in your state.**

Well, yeah; just don’t expect me to bail you out in the middle of the night or anything.

Thank you for thinking of me. You like WH Auden, right? (If I didn’t read that somewhere, you can add an embarassed smilely here.)

Private rites of magic send  
The temple prostitues to sleep,  
All the literati keep  
An **imaginary friend**.

Congrats on 5,000. Don’t be a stranger or anything.

Your humble acquaintance,  
HS

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### Author: ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)
#### Post date: [April 9, 2002, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/5 "2002-04-09T20:48:08Z")

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I love Auden, but the “imaginary friends” comment was first made by **Magdalene** , whom I will never let forget it. 😉

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### Author: ![Yo\_La\_Tengo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/41988e/32.png) [@Yo\_La\_Tengo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yo_La_Tengo)
#### Post date: [April 9, 2002, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/6 "2002-04-09T22:27:35Z")

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Psh

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### Author: ![Yo\_La\_Tengo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/41988e/32.png) [@Yo\_La\_Tengo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yo_La_Tengo)
#### Post date: [April 9, 2002, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/7 "2002-04-09T22:29:19Z")

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Oops, meant to hit preview, just curious at what three letters would look like by itself. Anyway, even though you didn’t thank me, congratulations, **dropzone**.

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### Author: ![tisiphone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@tisiphone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tisiphone)
#### Post date: [April 9, 2002, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/8 "2002-04-09T22:46:04Z")

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🆒

Congrats!

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### Author: ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)
#### Post date: [April 9, 2002, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/9 "2002-04-09T22:49:47Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Yo La Tengo \*  
> \*\*Anyway, even though you didn’t thank me, congratulations, **dropzone**. \*\*

I’d like to second that sentiment, word for word! 😃

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### Author: ![robinc308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@robinc308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robinc308)
#### Post date: [April 9, 2002, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/10 "2002-04-09T23:09:02Z")

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Congrats

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### Author: ![abel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@abel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abel)
#### Post date: [April 9, 2002, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/11 "2002-04-09T23:33:21Z")

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Congratulations dropzone! You’ve just reached your 5000th post! What are you going to do now?

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### Author: ![Gundy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b782af/32.png) [@Gundy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gundy)
#### Post date: [April 9, 2002, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/12 "2002-04-09T23:41:14Z")

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**dropzone** , you sweet li’l puddinhead you, here’s a poem I’ve composed in honor of your 5000th post.

::clearing throat::  
Oh freddled gruntbuggly,  
thy micturations are to me…

Oh wait, wrong page.

Skiddly widdly wan  
Dropzone is the man  
Skiddly widdly weet  
Dropzone can’t be beat  
Skiddly widdly wousand  
Happy post 5000!  
Skiddly widdly wass  
Hey! Look at my ass!

That was absolutely worth the 37 seconds it took to create. Absolutely.

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### Author: ![vix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a88e4f/32.png) [@vix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vix)
#### Post date: [April 10, 2002, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/13 "2002-04-10T01:01:06Z")

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Congrats, my friend!

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### Author: ![porcupine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ac91a4/32.png) [@porcupine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/porcupine)
#### Post date: [April 10, 2002, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/14 "2002-04-10T01:36:17Z")

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Good to see you again this weekend, **drop**. But I didn’t notice you staring at my cleavage this time…

[sub]Happy 5000[/sub]

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### Author: ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)
#### Post date: [April 10, 2002, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/15 "2002-04-10T01:55:29Z")

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How can I possibly NOT adore a man who’s first words to me (after giving me a wonderful hug) upon our meeting at ChiDope, were “you ruined my life!”

Glad you stuck around this long, **dropzone,** and hope I can continue to ruin your life for a long, long time. 😉

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### Author: ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)
#### Post date: [April 10, 2002, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/16 "2002-04-10T02:38:11Z")

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Aaahh. What the hell. I’ll wish you a happy 5K… even if it means admitting your postcount is bigger than mine.

Fenris

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### Author: ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)
#### Post date: [April 10, 2002, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/17 "2002-04-10T03:11:44Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by tisiphone \*  
> \*\*Congrats! \*\*

EEEK! How could I have forgotten \*_tisiphone_, my partner in True Crime? Honest, you were on my mental list as I lay in bed last night not sleeping because I wanted to remember everyone I could, but ESPECIALLY you, She Who is Also Fascinated By Serial Killers!

I also thought of you as I was leafing through a book of crime photos at the book store the other day. I realize most people wouldn’t be complimented if I told them that I thought of them as I gazed on half-rotted corpses and murdered mobsters, but I figured YOU’D understand!

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### Author: ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)
#### Post date: [April 10, 2002, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/18 "2002-04-10T03:41:07Z")

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Come now, **Flamsterette\_X** and **Yo La Tengo** [sub]1[/sub] , while I have grown rather fond[sub]2[/sub] of both of you in the past few weeks, and while I was defending just the other night my affection for newbies—I mean, fresh meat—_I MEAN_ our most recent arrivals, please note that I scarcely know[sub]3[/sub] either of you. I look forward to the opportunity to get to know you better.[sub]4[/sub]  
[sub]1 - “Hey, Dagan, what does ‘Yo la tengo’ mean?”

“‘I have it’ with the feminine form of ‘it,’ if that helps any.”

“I’d be more helped if it had a masculine or feminine form of ‘I.’”

2 - In a platonic manner, especially if **Yo La Tengo** is a guy.

3 - Unlike **Persephone** , f’rinstance, I haven’t touched your breasts.

4 - Touch your breasts or shake your hand, depending on your gender and the size and location of your SO.[/sub]

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### Author: ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)
#### Post date: [April 10, 2002, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/19 "2002-04-10T03:59:20Z")

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Slight hijack, if’n you don’t mind–

You two are captivated by serial killers? Um, hey, can I join your merry little twosome and make it an Unholy Trio or something? I _loooooooves_ me some true crime. Really!

Okay, back to congratulating dropzone now. Sorry about that.

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### Author: ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)
#### Post date: [April 10, 2002, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698/20 "2002-04-10T04:26:03Z")

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Of course you can! If you don’t have them already, I’ll even give you some classic links to guarantee you won’t sleep tonight. It’s the least I can do for the woman who kept me up (so to speak) all Saturday night!

First, a fellow who mostly worked in Chicago, not far from where we met, [Dr HH Holmes.](http://www.crimelibrary.com/serial6/holmes/index.htm) (It’s always good to add that personal touch!)

Then the most excellent site of its kind, giving far more info on [Jack the Ripper](http://www.casebook.org/) than a reasonable person would want to know.

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-5000-or-thanking-my-imaginary-friends/102698.md?page=2)
