# Post a punchline **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 14, 2009, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432 "2009-05-14T17:58:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/21 "2009-05-14T18:50:24Z")
Timing! > [@muldoonthief](#): > > Nothing, you’ve already told her twice. OMG, I was just thinking of this joke earlier today. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/22 "2009-05-14T19:10:11Z")
She tried to read the waffle iron. ---
**Author:** ![hroark2112](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6a8cbe/32.png) [@hroark2112](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hroark2112)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/23 "2009-05-14T19:23:58Z")
Paint his toenails red! ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/24 "2009-05-14T19:26:15Z")
“Well, how about a little head?” ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/25 "2009-05-14T19:26:45Z")
“But this one’s eating my popcorn!” ---
**Author:** ![Stauderhorse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Stauderhorse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stauderhorse)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/26 "2009-05-14T19:31:49Z")
Rectum? Damn near killed him! ---
**Author:** ![yanceylebeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yanceylebeef/32/12290_2.png) [@yanceylebeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yanceylebeef)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/27 "2009-05-14T19:37:20Z")
How many’s a Brazillian? you missed the Fucking putt, didn’t you Sister? ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/28 "2009-05-14T19:39:36Z")
“One’s a big unit, the other one’s a Randy Johnson.” ---
**Author:** ![UltraVires](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ecccb3/32.png) [@UltraVires](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UltraVires)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/29 "2009-05-14T19:54:18Z")
I’m sorry, sir. I was on the wrong side of the bar. ---
**Author:** ![yanceylebeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yanceylebeef/32/12290_2.png) [@yanceylebeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yanceylebeef)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/30 "2009-05-14T20:00:01Z")
“I don’t know about the other two, but the one in the middle looks like Willie Nelson.” ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/31 "2009-05-14T20:03:01Z")
And the bishop put his feet up on the table and said, “You motherfuckers are all right.” ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_Tightlips](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/57b2e6/32.png) [@Joey\_Tightlips](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_Tightlips)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/32 "2009-05-14T20:05:15Z")
“No, it’s a Twinkie, but _I like the way you’re thinking_!” ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/33 "2009-05-14T20:16:48Z")
“Hey, where’s my creme doughnut?” _ **WHAM!** _ ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/34 "2009-05-14T20:41:45Z")
“I want two more of these!” ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/35 "2009-05-14T20:48:30Z")
“Santa, where do you want me to put this tree?” ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/36 "2009-05-14T21:11:28Z")
You serve a drink named Steve?? …I’m not gargling AFTER she sticks her ass in that fount! Those aren’t bouys! ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/37 "2009-05-14T21:15:58Z")
Nah, if the first six shots didn’t kill the taste, one more won’t help. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/38 "2009-05-14T21:23:17Z")
Third, you gotta give me a few days to come up with $500. ---
**Author:** ![BlinkingDuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eada6e/32.png) [@BlinkingDuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlinkingDuck)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/39 "2009-05-14T21:24:38Z")
Goes home. ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432/40 "2009-05-14T21:25:26Z")
I can’t peanut butter my cock up your ass. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-a-punchline/496432.md?page=3)