# Post the stupidest things you hear Olympic announcers say **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 14, 2006, 8:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429 "2006-02-14T08:42:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/81 "2006-02-24T15:29:08Z")
> [@Zeldar](#): > > That just had to be a joke, right? I mean, how does somebody that dumb breathe? Thru the mouth, loudly. I am trying to remember the very stupid thing that the female commentator said about last noc’s women’s figure skating. Essentially, she contradicted herself in the same sentence. :rolleyes: Dick Button is a tool–a few years ago, my daughter and I swear he called Sasha Cohen, “delicious”. He hasn’t been ON the ice in how many decades now? Can’t they replace him with someone who is not drooling over young girls and also is not showing signs of senile dementia? Blech. ---
**Author:** ![Eureka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/74df32/32.png) [@Eureka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eureka)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/82 "2006-02-24T15:34:29Z")
I’m getting very tired of listening to commentators, both on NBC and on NPR, who don’t seem to understand what the word “favorite” means in sports. Not that I’m a big watcher of sports, in general, but I kind of like watching the Olympics, and I understand that “favorite” means “contestant most likely to win” (when compared to other contestants) not “contestant likely to win”(and if they don’t it’s a big deal, needing much analysis). Whether it is Bodie Miller, or Darren Rahles or Michelle Kwan or Irina Slutskya or anyone else in their assorted events–I don’t mind mentions of favorites, but I’m getting exceedingly tired of announcers/ commentators who don’t seem to understand that falls, disqualifications, just plain not skating/skiing/bobsledding/etc. as incredibly fast as last time, picking out the wrong skis(blades,wax,whatever), bobbled landings, and various other things frequently happen–even to the best competitors. And in fact, in many cases, they are more likely to happen to the best, because the best take more risks because they hope for bigger rewards. I really liked Jaret “Speedy” Peterson’s attitude after he performed “the Hurricane” in the aerials final, and ended with a not great landing, thus placing him out of the medals. He could have played it safe–gone for the quad twisting triple, rather than the quint twisting triple-- and maybe would have won a medal, but he wanted to do well for his sport, not just himself, so he tried the higher degree of difficulty, and didn’t land it well enough to win. No regrets. I also don’t like the amount of time they spend announcing that “So and So just moved into first place, but the best are still to come” (especially if combined with camera angles focused on the best, or the most American, still to come.) Look, I knew when I sat down that the winning figure skaters were not going to compete until after I decided it was bedtime-- it annoys me, but I’d be much happier if you’d cut the promos and squeezed in another figure skater–or another snowboardcross race (and a better explanation of the process by which these ladies qualified to be in the finals, or else showed the first leg of the finals). Note: All spellings approximate. I don’t care enough to double check any of them. ---
**Author:** ![flodnak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/838e76/32.png) [@flodnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flodnak)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/83 "2006-02-24T15:37:42Z")
This was a few days ago, but I swear I heard the Norwegian announcer on Eurosport say, during a men’s hockey game: “It’s when the Russians get up close to the goal that they get dangerous.” :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/84 "2006-02-24T16:00:58Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > Dick Button is a tool–a few years ago, my daughter and I swear he called Sasha Cohen, “delicious”. He hasn’t been ON the ice in how many decades now? Can’t they replace him with someone who is not drooling over young girls and also is not showing signs of senile dementia? Blech. He annoys me sometimes, but at least he criticizes the skaters to some extent. While Dorothy Hamill or Peggy Fleming, or Scotty, sit there fawning, he will actually call the skaters out on flaws or mistakes. Of course he sounds like a crotchety old man so I can only take it in small doses, but like Simon vs. Randy&Paula, he will tell it like it is. And I liked how he said he was happy about the throw triple axel. It was a tremendous moment, something the Olympics are all about, and I was certainly excited for the pair. ---
**Author:** ![Honey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honey/32/5074_2.png) [@Honey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Honey)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/85 "2006-02-24T16:15:00Z")
> [@Indygrrl](#): > > Dick Buttons “The main difference between the short and the long programs is that one is longer than the other,” or somesuch. O rly? 😃 > > Actually, one could make a whole thread of just stupid things 'ol Dick had to say. Dick is obviously a graduate of the “John Madden school of commentating”. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Weird\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@The\_Weird\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Weird_One)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/86 "2006-02-24T16:26:24Z")
> [@light strand](#): > > I heard the woman calling the Ladies Figurskating say about Sasha Coen yesterday: > > “Other people skate _to_ “Romeo and Juliet”, Sasha _is_ Juliet”. Yeah, my stepsister and I heard that one last night, too. We looked at each other with a “Did she just say that?” look and burst out laughing. We’re also both really sick of the firsts, like the the first Turkish skater to be in the Olympics (okay, kinda neat) and the first time China won a gold medal in the Winter Olympics (really stretching it there). We started making up our own: “Oo, that’s the first time a guy named Steve has fallen on the third mogel of his second run during the Winter Olympics!” ---
**Author:** ![Runestar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/74df32/32.png) [@Runestar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Runestar)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/87 "2006-02-24T16:33:52Z")
And I’m still waiting for someone to explain to me why, in the middle of the Olympic coverage, NBC decided that Bob Costas should have a sit-down with Jerome “The Bus” Bettis in the studio. _Yeah, we’ve got some of the greatest atheletes in the world competing her in Italy, but instead of showing them let’s interview a just-retired American football player"_ What’s the matter NBC? Ratings tanking so badly that you’re hoping that a little _tete-a-tete_ (sp?) with Jerome will pull in those young males your advertisers covet so badly? I am **so** glad we get CBC up here… ---
**Author:** ![kelly5078](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/6f9a4e/32.png) [@kelly5078](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kelly5078)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/88 "2006-02-24T16:47:29Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > Can’t they replace him with someone who is not drooling over young girls… He’s gay. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Weird\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@The\_Weird\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Weird_One)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/89 "2006-02-24T16:53:19Z")
Just heard on NPR: “She is the first Japanese figure skater to win an Olympic Gold Medal.” ---
**Author:** ![AuntiePam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/90 "2006-02-24T17:16:28Z")
> [@light strand](#): > > I also hear her say, about another skater: > > "She’s skating _on_ the ice when she need to be _in_ the ice. I wondered about that one. I didn’t know if she was speaking metaphorically or what. After that I started watching for skaters who really dug their skates down deep in the ice. Didn’t see any of 'em doing that. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/91 "2006-02-24T18:38:16Z")
> [@light strand](#): > > I heard the woman calling the Ladies Figurskating say about Sasha Coen yesterday: > > “Other people skate _to_ “Romeo and Juliet”, Sasha _is_ Juliet”. > > I also hear her say, about another skater: > > "She’s skating _on_ the ice when she need to be _in_ the ice. I heard that. During the same competition, the guy (Dick Button, maybe? I don’t know who’s who.) compared someone’s routine to a souffle, referring to all the work that went into it, and said “It’s sad to see someone’s souffle fail to soofull.” I spelled that last word as he pronounced it. Definite WTF moment for me. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/92 "2006-02-24T18:56:14Z")
> [@kelly5078](#): > > He’s gay. If he is gay, then why the whole crotchey old man who sizes up these girls as if he can’t wait to rub up against them? He reminds me most of some old uncle that everyone is told to never be alone in a room with. Blech. I also heard the Juliet remark and my daughter and I just looked at one another–we said together, “so-who’s Romeo?” and burst out laughing. It was right after that the female said something (I have early Alzeimers I swear) and then instantly contradicted herself, in the same sentence. I vaguely remember laughing at “the ice is slippery” comment a few years ago. And I swear that Button once said of a now retired American skater (she was blonde, Angela something): “there are skaters you run to watch and then there are skaters you get up and get a drink from the fridge while they’re on.” Nice. **gigi** -I agree that sometimes Scott H is just too over the top with his praise. I don’t know the others well enough to say (I dont’ even know their names). Did anyone else notice the LACK of commentary last noc? There were whole segments of skating where no-one said a thing. God knows I tire of constant patter, but a skater would jump and maybe bobble a bit and bupkus. It was odd. ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/93 "2006-02-24T19:02:41Z")
> [@Smeghead](#): > > I heard that. During the same competition, the guy (Dick Button, maybe? I don’t know who’s who.) compared someone’s routine to a souffle, referring to all the work that went into it, and said “It’s sad to see someone’s souffle fail to soofull.” I spelled that last word as he pronounced it. Definite WTF moment for me. YES!! I was just telling someone at lunch that I heard the same thing. When he said it my wife and I turned to each other with a WTF? look on our faces. “Sooful?” ---
**Author:** ![The\_Weird\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@The\_Weird\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Weird_One)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/94 "2006-02-24T19:27:31Z")
> [@Smeghead](#): > > I heard that. During the same competition, the guy (Dick Button, maybe? I don’t know who’s who.) compared someone’s routine to a souffle, referring to all the work that went into it, and said “It’s sad to see someone’s souffle fail to soofull.” I spelled that last word as he pronounced it. Definite WTF moment for me. Bwaaahahahaha! 😃 Oh, man, I missed that one, but I’m absolutely going to adopt it into my vocabulary. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/95 "2006-02-24T19:29:30Z")
> [@Honey](#): > > Anyone else think it’d be highly entertaining to have John Madden doing the commentating for figure skating? Or how about the Fred Willard character from _Best in Show_? ---
**Author:** ![kelly5078](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/6f9a4e/32.png) [@kelly5078](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kelly5078)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/96 "2006-02-24T19:30:22Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > If he is gay, then why the whole crotchey old man who sizes up these girls as if he can’t wait to rub up against them? He reminds me most of some old uncle that everyone is told to never be alone in a room with. Blech. I don’t know why he says the stupid things he does, nor do I know why he’s such a tool. All I know is that the man is unabashedly gay, and is therefore unlikely to be drooling over little girls per your previous post. Interestingly, Scott Hamilton has, in the past, said some derogatory things about gay male skaters. I wonder how they get along. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/97 "2006-02-24T20:14:54Z")
Button says all manner of things (or used to-I think he was told to cool it) about skaters, Cohen in particular. I now pity the gay community for being saddled with Button. He needs to be retired to the Wide World of Sports Home for the Perpetually Bewildered. Can you tell I don’t like Dick Button? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/98 "2006-02-24T20:33:27Z")
I bet Dick Button’s name looks funny in the phone book. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2006, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/99 "2006-02-24T20:42:39Z")
Dick Button did a perfect sendup of himself, doing commentary while Yakko sang all the words in the English language on _Animaniacs_. I’m willing to cut him a whole lot of slack after that. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2006, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429/100 "2006-02-25T02:37:28Z")
> [@Carnac the Magnificent!](#): > > Katie Couric is there. Enough said. > > Katie is a nitwit, an imbecilic twit. This morning, she admitted to being hungover during the broadcast–that from a prospective CBS news anchor. The cute sktick doesn’t work with a nearly 50-year-old nag. > > Couric the Olympics broadcaster today: “If you’re like me, you’re sick of downhill skiing and ice skating. What I want to do is sled down a hill.” :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: > > Why not just go home, sweetie? Ah, the person I love to hate. I think it was either this morning or yesterday, when speaking from high up on the _Mole_, she read the height from the prompter and then commented: “Yikes!” How insightful; what genius; and I was there to see and hear it. I wait in breathless anticipation for her next monosyllabic utterance. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-the-stupidest-things-you-hear-olympic-announcers-say/344429.md?page=6)