# Post War Careers For Baghdad Bob **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 7, 2003, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-war-careers-for-baghdad-bob/167032 "2003-04-07T11:25:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2003, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-war-careers-for-baghdad-bob/167032/1 "2003-04-07T11:25:12Z")
AKA The Iraqi Minister of Information. As others have [commented](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=175181), the guy’s ability to get in front of the cameras and utterly deny the Coalition accounts of the battlefield events with a straight face is utterly amazing. Rather than hijack the thread commenting on his abilities, I’d thought I’d start a new one discussing possible careers he could hold after the war. _ **Trading Spaces: The Dictator’s Edition!** _: Various dictators exchange palaces and redecorate them. BB: What do you mean lepard print and red velour don’t go well with one another! They’re naturals for one another! And what’s wrong with painting solid gold bathroom fixtures fushia? Anyone can have gold bathroom fixtures, but not everyone can see the beauty in painting them fushia! _ **Ebert & Baghdad Bob** _: No more of Roper’s fawning comments on Ebert’s reviews! BB tells it like it is! BB: How can you say Tom Hanks is a great actor? No one thinks that he’s a decent actor! Right now, hundreds of Hollywood extras are marching on Tom Hanks’s home in protest of his horrible performances! _ **Iron Chef** _: BB’s a judge, who let’s you know how the food _really_ tastes! BB: Back when we were beating back the American aggressors, those of us in the Iraqi government went without food so that the people of Iraq wouldn’t starve. I have to tell you, it was rough one us, we were forced to our medals to survive! I can tell you that if someone had presented a meal like this to us during that time, we _still_ would have eaten our medals than endure something so awful! _ **Enron Spokesman** _: He’ll set the record straight about those reports of “creative accounting!” BB: We’re not broke! We’ve got plenty of money! As a matter of fact, we’re planning a hostile take over of Microsoft because we’ve got so much money and we don’t know what to do with it all! ---
**Author:** ![PhiloVance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e19adc/32.png) [@PhiloVance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PhiloVance)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2003, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-war-careers-for-baghdad-bob/167032/2 "2003-04-07T15:15:15Z")
_ **Sports reporter** _ \>\> Bonds no hit great home runs, we have guy name Iraqui Ike who hit longer, more better, more decent and patriotic home run. I show you next week. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2003, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-war-careers-for-baghdad-bob/167032/3 "2003-04-07T15:51:28Z")
How about the DNC’s press secretary? He’d fit right in with Clinnochio and McAuliffe… ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2003, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-war-careers-for-baghdad-bob/167032/4 "2003-04-07T16:45:49Z")
Actually, I might want to have that guy as my personal spokesman here at work. Boss: Is the report done? Iraqi Bob: There was never a question of the report being done. It was done before you even requested it. We will give you proof of this in two weeks time. ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2003, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-war-careers-for-baghdad-bob/167032/5 "2003-04-07T22:11:07Z")
GWB’s spokeman on domestic economics? “The stock market did not crash shortly after the election of our glorious leader, no! Instead, it needed to back up to get a running start at the glorious leap it shall make unto the most supreme heights ever visited! And besides, every capitalist idiot knows it was that Zionist Greenspan.” ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2003, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-war-careers-for-baghdad-bob/167032/6 "2003-04-07T22:32:10Z")
“Come to Baghdad Bob’s Furniture Palace, where our prices are none of your business! But if you _can_ find a lower price, tell us! We will cut the throats of the mercenary infidels and teach them a lesson they will never forget!” ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/13edae/32.png) [@Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Cheatem_Undhow)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-war-careers-for-baghdad-bob/167032/7 "2003-04-08T02:20:38Z")
Does anyone remember Joe Isuzu? I have a vision of a new ad campaign starring Joe Isuzu and Baghdad Bob. It’d be brilliant, I tell ya, brilliant. ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-war-careers-for-baghdad-bob/167032/8 "2003-04-08T02:43:36Z")
Lessee…Joe Isuzu, Baghdad Bob, and Jon Lovitz–all together in a big lie-off. That’s one pay-per-view I’d purchase. (Special guest appearances by Geraldo Rivera, Rush Limbaugh, and Bill Clinton.) ---
**Author:** ![Kiger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Kiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kiger)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-war-careers-for-baghdad-bob/167032/9 "2003-04-08T02:59:45Z")
1. Presidential speech writer - anyone not “with us” will get a new insult hurled at them daily. 2. The new Mr. Rogers - slap a sweater and some sneakers on him. He has an imagination that won’t quit. 3. NORML spokesman - because everyone wants what he’s smoking. ---
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/post-war-careers-for-baghdad-bob/167032/10 "2003-04-08T03:05:36Z")
**TF** , lubs ya! All of us really needed this, whether anyone knows it or not!!!