# Potentially socially awkward situation where we like the husband as a friend but not his wife

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/potentially-socially-awkward-situation-where-we-like-the-husband-as-a-friend-but-not-his-wife/507134>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [August 20, 2009, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/potentially-socially-awkward-situation-where-we-like-the-husband-as-a-friend-but-not-his-wife/507134 "2009-08-20T22:41:02Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 4\
**Page:** 9

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**Author:** ![pope\_hentai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ee59a6/32.png) [@pope\_hentai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pope_hentai)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2011, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/potentially-socially-awkward-situation-where-we-like-the-husband-as-a-friend-but-not-his-wife/507134/161 "2011-02-25T06:37:44Z")

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wow… i soo WAS this guy. I feel sorry for him, and hope he gets his stuff together. Personally, i would have told him exactly the reasons things weren’t working out. He may be so into his relationship that he doesn’t notice, its been going on so long he’s gotten used to it, or he doesn’t let it concern himself because if it was really so bad someone would say something to him. I know when i got divorced, i DID get back in touch with a couple people just to thank them for trying to tell me. My ex actually tried to start crap with ex-girlfriends that i had remained on friendly terms with (and lived rediculous distances away) through fake online identities to make sure they didn’t talk to me.

Perhaps i just see some of my former situation in the poor victim, and wish him the best in getting out.

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**Author:** ![Bearflag70](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2011, 7:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/potentially-socially-awkward-situation-where-we-like-the-husband-as-a-friend-but-not-his-wife/507134/162 "2011-02-25T07:13:09Z")

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As far as the “he knew what he was getting into” bit, I don’t know if I mentioned they were dating for something like 6 months before they got engaged and IIRC married shortly thereafter. He knew he was exposing himself to the risk that his wife would turn out to be a bitch, but he probably didn’t know she was a bitch until later.

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**Author:** ![ShelliBean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f9ae1b/32.png) [@ShelliBean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShelliBean)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2011, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/potentially-socially-awkward-situation-where-we-like-the-husband-as-a-friend-but-not-his-wife/507134/163 "2011-02-25T14:29:27Z")

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I saw the update and immediately thought “This is it! This is the blow-up divorce update!” Oh well, sounds like your wife did the best thing possible in the situation.

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**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2011, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/potentially-socially-awkward-situation-where-we-like-the-husband-as-a-friend-but-not-his-wife/507134/164 "2011-02-25T17:56:49Z")

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Hah, thanks for the bump Bearflag, this made some enjoyable lunchtime reading. Soap operas on the internets are great.

Unfriending the clueless is always so awkward. In the end I think you guys played it ok, and NOT sending the “ur wife sux” email was definitely the right move.

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