# Predict how you will die **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 6, 2014, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195 "2014-06-06T13:03:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![usedtobe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ec9cab/32.png) [@usedtobe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/usedtobe)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 7:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/61 "2014-06-07T07:59:31Z")
> [@DrumBum](#): > > [This quiz](http://www.gotoquiz.com/how_will_i_die) said I would die of boredom, which sounds about right. “Saving Somebody’s Life” Hah! Like I could do anything except smell gas and evacuate a place. Actually, I will die of terminal disease. So screw your silly quiz… Of course, the disease gives me lots of drugs - and I have enough on hand to exit at a time of my choosing, before the disease gets out of hand ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 8:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/62 "2014-06-07T08:18:29Z")
But the caveat is you never really think you’ve reached that point, until it’s too late to do anything about it. ---
**Author:** ![stui\_magpie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stui_magpie/32/11010_2.png) [@stui\_magpie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stui_magpie)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 9:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/63 "2014-06-07T09:42:35Z")
I’m determined not to end up slowly withering away in some nursing home. So, the options in no particular order are: - Suicide once quality of life recedes and I still have the marbles left to pull a trigger -heart attack on wedding night at 90 years old having given the 20 year old new wife and her bridesmaid an absolute seeing to in the bedroom -of shock when my son tells me he’s got a job - doing something that starts with me saying"hey, watch this" and ends up being the opening story on news broadcasts around the world with the caveat “Don’t try this at home” ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/64 "2014-06-07T11:35:58Z")
Alone ---
**Author:** ![RobDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f07891/32.png) [@RobDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RobDog)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/65 "2014-06-07T11:40:27Z")
> [@Knorf](#): > > Alone. May I introduce you to… > [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](#): > > Alone I hope you have many happy years together. ---
**Author:** ![Whitney\_Harper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f0a364/32.png) [@Whitney\_Harper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whitney_Harper)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/66 "2014-06-07T18:22:27Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > Throwing up my hands in the face of a serious illness. I don’t like doctors. I hate dealing with institutional beauracracy and bills. I am vulnerable to feelings of hopelessness and nihilism. So I could see me being diagnosed with a life-threatening disease (like brain cancer) and simply not deal with it until the pain becamse unbearable. And then it would be too late. I don’t like doctors either. I like doctors as people, but I don’t like going to them for check-ups, etc. I had a grandmother who lived into her nineties and she had not been to a doctor for forty or fifty years. She died suddenly, probably from a heart attack or stroke. ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/67 "2014-06-07T20:38:35Z")
I have just one kidney, having lost the other to stones. I figure I’ll die of some urological problem. If I don’t, and it’s an accident in which I have time to react, my last words will probably be “Oh shit!”. I’d prefer to think it would be something like “God help me”, but my panic reflex will probably be too strong, more’s the pity. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/68 "2014-06-07T20:50:48Z")
> [@DrumBum](#): > > [This quiz](http://www.gotoquiz.com/how_will_i_die) said I would die of boredom, which sounds about right. According to that quiz, I’ll die while having sex. 2nd place was while heroically saving someone. I’ll take it. ---
**Author:** ![Zuzu\_s\_Petals](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e19b73/32.png) [@Zuzu\_s\_Petals](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zuzu_s_Petals)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/69 "2014-06-07T21:01:22Z")
It sounds weird but I think I’ll die from a fall down a flight of stairs. That’s how my paternal grandmother went when she was in her 90’s. I’ve had several falls down stairs already - I’m often kind of off in my own world, I guess, and misstep - and I can just see it happening. Stairs make me kind of nervous now; I’m always hyper-aware going down them. Until I forget to be, and then fall again. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2014, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/70 "2014-06-08T00:07:57Z")
The quiz said I’d die in my sleep (which I used to be absolutely terrified of, natch), but I have totally no doubt that I’ll choke to death somehow. I already have a problem swallowing correctly that needs to be corrected by a surgery that’ll never happen, so I’m just one too big bite of burrito away from buying the big Taco Bell in the sky. ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2014, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/71 "2014-06-08T00:24:27Z")
Suicide. My parents lived to 98 and 93, and I refuse to experience that indignity. I asked my cardiologist how people die when they have a heart attack, he said they fairly quickly pass into a coma, and life auto-support shuts down. That might come first, as I’ve had a stent, so imperfect cardiac durability. ---
**Author:** ![claramorena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/2acd7d/32.png) [@claramorena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/claramorena)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2014, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/72 "2014-06-08T00:42:40Z")
by chocolate cake ---
**Author:** ![lavenderviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cdc98d/32.png) [@lavenderviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lavenderviolet)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2014, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/73 "2014-06-08T00:54:00Z")
I don’t live an especially risky life, so I expect I will be like most people and die of either cardiovascular disease or cancer. I think cancer is more likely in my case. Since I am a vegetarian, don’t smoke, exercise regularly, etc. I feel pretty optimistic that my heart will hold out. I just hope that I don’t get cancer any time soon, because I do think that the future of cancer care will be much better than it is today. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2014, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/74 "2014-06-08T01:15:29Z")
> [@claramorena](#): > > by chocolate cake Suicide. By chocolate cake. That would be awesome. Anyone know what the lethal dose is? ---
**Author:** ![claramorena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/2acd7d/32.png) [@claramorena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/claramorena)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2014, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/75 "2014-06-08T01:19:04Z")
> **[Theobromine poisoning](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theobromine_poisoning)** > > Theobromine poisoning, also informally called chocolate poisoning or cocoa poisoning, is an overdosage reaction to the xanthine alkaloid theobromine, found in chocolate, tea, cola beverages, and some other foods. > Cocoa powder contains about 2.1% theobromine by weight, so 14 g (0.5 oz) of raw cocoa contains approximately 0.3 g theobromine. > Processed chocolate, in general, has smaller amounts. The amount found in highly refined chocolate candies or sweets (typically 1.4–2.1 g/kg or 40–60 mg/oz) i... ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2014, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/76 "2014-06-08T01:26:11Z")
> [@Martian Bigfoot](#): > > Suicide. By chocolate cake. That would be awesome. Anyone know what the lethal dose is? It seemed you were on to something, there. But check out those symptoms; the cake won’t stay down OR up–bummer. ☹ Clearly more research is needed; I’ll get right on it. ---
**Author:** ![Red\_Stilettos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/fbc32d/32.png) [@Red\_Stilettos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Red_Stilettos)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2014, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/77 "2014-06-08T01:51:31Z")
Some kind of infectious disease. I’m a microbiologist, specializing in pathogenesis. No reason, just always thought it would be so. If I’m right, I just hope it’s something quick. ---
**Author:** ![Sigene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df788c/32.png) [@Sigene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigene)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2014, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/78 "2014-06-08T03:35:13Z")
Sucking on Helium shortly after an Alzheimer’s diagnosis ---
**Author:** ![usedtobe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ec9cab/32.png) [@usedtobe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/usedtobe)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2014, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/79 "2014-06-08T04:30:53Z")
Variant Q: You have the means to kill yourself; nobody can take them away. But: you screw up, and, with 12 horrible months left, you are convicted of a crime which will get you a minimum a five years in prison. Once you are in there, you will not have access to your exit plan. You may or may not be released on appeal, but no guarantee. Sentencing is next week. Until then you are home with your exit kit. Whatcha going to do? ---
**Author:** ![CheshireKat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheshirekat/32/1207_2.png) [@CheshireKat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CheshireKat)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2014, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195/80 "2014-06-08T05:12:35Z")
I would like to die in some absolutely bizarre way, like the lady sunbathing on a boat who was killed by a flying manta ray in Florida, or that poor young man crushed by a falling 90’ crucifixion statue in Italy. If that doesn’t happen and I get very old and infirm, my back-up plan is to buy a bottle of Bailey’s Irish Whiskey, drive to Canada, tromp out into the deep snow, get drunk and happily freeze to death. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/predict-how-you-will-die/690195.md?page=5)