# Preparing For Post Obama Election (KooKoo Watch) **URL:** \ **Category:** Politics & Elections\ **Created:** [November 9, 2012, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454 "2012-11-09T04:56:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/1 "2012-11-09T04:56:58Z")
One of the denizens of FreeRepublic describes [his plan](http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/2957088/posts) to survive as the blight of tyranny descends upon our once fair land: > [@](#): > > Today, I instructed my wife to prepare for post Obama election by doing the following: > > 1. Close out our bank accounts, checking accounts, savings account. > > 2. Eliminate and exist from all medical service programs, insurance, and destroy all medical records and ID numbers. > > 3. Destroy and toss all cell phones. > > 4. Take out and smash all black boxes in our vehicles. Will put on the road my 69 mustaang. > > 5. Cut up all credit cards and call to stop all transactions. > > 6. Call and stop propane gas shipments, will now burn firewood. Already have more than 500 cord stacked as a backup. > > 7. Buy only the bare necessaities and pay all bills with a money order. > > 8. Plan all travel areas, use back roads to avoid TSA agents. > > 9. Do not use landline telephone only in an emergency. > > 10. Call and turn off Direct TV. > > 11. End all computer web services. > > 12. Build a gate at the end of our driveway and keep it locked. Inform all friends and relatives to call first prior to a visit so the gate can be unlocked. > > 13. Get involved more heavily with local Tea Party to establish a third party, no more money to the GOP under any circumstance! > > The list may be updated to include other more secret actions that the government need not know about here! The funniest part is that even the other FReepers are snickering: > [@](#): > > Don’t you think that this list is a tad overdone? > [@](#): > > Sounds just a bit paranoid, doesn’t it? Oh well! It takes all kinds. LOL > [@](#): > > I am curious as to what your wife said when you told her to do all of those things. > [@](#): > > I assume we can put you in the “disappointed with election results” column? And, my personal favorite: > [@](#): > > If you’re destroying all cell phones and only using landlines in an emergency then how are your friends going to call you when they need the gate unlocked? ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/2 "2012-11-09T05:01:52Z")
> [@](#): > > 1. Destroy and toss all cell phones. > > … > > 1. Do not use landline telephone only in an emergency. > > … > > 1. Build a gate at the end of our driveway and keep it locked. **Inform all friends and relatives to call first** prior to a visit so the gate can be unlocked. How is that going to work? ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/3 "2012-11-09T05:05:38Z")
This is like… the 3rd one of these I’ve seen so far. One in the pit, and another one here in this forum. I love it. Keep 'em coming. But maybe expect a merge. Also, a creepy note about this post. Last night I had a dream that I got into a debate with my dad about what a “cord of wood” meant (whether it was mass, volume, or number of pieces). I would have completely forgotten about that dream until I read this post. I mean, how often do you ever talk about a “cord of wood” and why the hell did I dream about it last night, only to read about it today? Also… 500 cords of wood? Damn that’s a lot of wood. That’s what she said. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/4 "2012-11-09T05:08:45Z")
> [@](#): > > 1. **End all computer web services.** > > … > > **The list may be updated** to include other more secret actions that the government need not know about here! How is he going to update the list after ending all computer web services? ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/5 "2012-11-09T05:11:23Z")
> [@Steve\_MB](#): > > How is he going to update the list after ending all computer web services? And if he does update it later… how is he going to keep it secret from the government? And why would he admit to eventually planning things that the government need not know about, publicly? ---
**Author:** ![Lancia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lancia/32/17174_2.png) [@Lancia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lancia)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/6 "2012-11-09T05:12:44Z")
500 cords firewood? That’s _64,000_cubic feet. He must have fried his brain chopping all that wood in the sun. Perhaps he should have had the foresight to bring along a Gatorade. Edit: good buddy Drew is awake tonight. FTR a cord is 128 cu ft. of tightly stacked wood. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/7 "2012-11-09T05:14:45Z")
How’s he going to pay for things with money orders if he’s closed all his bank accounts? Hell, how is he even going to get PAID? ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/8 "2012-11-09T05:17:08Z")
I do wonder just how many of these people are really going to do this kind of prepare-for-the-Obamapocalypse stuff, and end up with screwed up lives like the people who sell all their property because they believe some preacher who tells them the end of the world is happening on _X_ date. ---
**Author:** ![Lancia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lancia/32/17174_2.png) [@Lancia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lancia)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/9 "2012-11-09T05:17:59Z")
Christ, one can’t talk cords and wood without it sounding dirty, can they? ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/10 "2012-11-09T05:18:44Z")
> [@Lancia](#): > > 500 cords firewood? That’s _64,000_cubic feet. He must have fried his brain chopping all that wood in the sun. Perhaps he should have had the foresight to bring along a Gatorade. > > Edit: good buddy Drew is awake tonight. FTR a cord is 128 cu ft. of tightly stacked wood. If I’m remembering my dream correctly, I think I was arguing that a cord of wood was probably a unit of volume. I kept saying “it’s probably like a gallon, a type of volume, you know… but not like a gallon of liquid, just the space a gallon takes up” and my dad was arguing that a cord of wood didn’t mean anything. Literally that it had no standard meaning, and people saying “cord of wood” meant different things. So I guess I won my dream argument, although I missed the important “tightly stacked” definition, so a cord relies on more than just a strict volume. > [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > I do wonder just how many of these people are really going to do this kind of prepare-for-the-Obamapocalypse stuff, and end up with screwed up lives like the people who sell all their property because they believe some preacher who tells them the end of the world is happening on _X_ date. Sadly, not enough of them. It’d be so nice if all these people really did remove themselves from polite society, wouldn’t it? ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Fun\_Ball](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_fun_ball/32/17664_2.png) [@Happy\_Fun\_Ball](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Fun_Ball)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/11 "2012-11-09T05:18:55Z")
These Randian Atlas Shrugged types are fucking morons. I heard this guy blathering about how Obama almost destroyed businesses I the last four years and how it was game over for all business owners and they may as well shut it down. Meanwhile back in reality corporate profits are at all time highs, taxes are at all time lows, and the top twenty percent has the highest share of earnings in the last eighty years or so. Fucking morons, who the fuck do they think is buying this shit? ---
**Author:** ![LinusK](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@LinusK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LinusK)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/12 "2012-11-09T05:55:27Z")
That is awesome. The comments are gold too. > [@](#): > > Laugh, this is NOT our Government anymore, why in the hell would you participate in a government that is foreign to America and has become an enemy of honest Americans? This of course is your prerogative, but, I don’t have to and will not feed the beast\> > Obama needs to get the deficit down, how do you suppose he will do that, cutting government? NO, he is coming for your money and wealth! How does government do that? It steals it from you. Are you going to just stand there and get mugged by the government? > > No one is laughing! Um yes. Yes we are. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/13 "2012-11-09T07:07:55Z")
> [@](#): > > 1. Get involved more heavily with local Tea Party to establish a third party, no more money to the GOP under any circumstance! After he goes off the grid and removes himself from all government registries, I really want to see the look on his face in four years when he shows up to vote. > [@L. G. Butts](#): > > These Randian Atlas Shrugged types are fucking morons. I heard this guy blathering about how Obama almost destroyed businesses I the last four years and how it was game over for all business owners and they may as well shut it down. Meanwhile back in reality corporate profits are at all time highs, taxes are at all time lows, and the top twenty percent has the highest share of earnings in the last eighty years or so. Fucking morons, who the fuck do they think is buying this shit? That’s what I’ve been trying to figure out. What do they think will happen in Obama’s second term that he couldn’t have done in his first? ---
**Author:** ![Jake\_Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Jake\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jake_Jones)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/14 "2012-11-09T07:10:44Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > How’s he going to pay for things with money orders if he’s closed all his bank accounts? Presumably with the cash the bank gave him when he closed his bank accounts. You can buy money orders practically everywhere. Every US Post Office in the country and almost every supermarket, drugstore or convenience store. You don’t need a bank account to buy a money order. That’s kind of the point of a money order, in fact. > [@](#): > > Hell, how is he even going to get PAID? A mysterious financial instrument known as a “paycheck.” One can take this promissory note to the financial institution that it is drawn from and exchange it for hard currency, which can then be exchanged for goods and services, including money orders. Checks can also be cashed at third party companies known cryptically as “check cashing services.” Two months ago, the FDIC released a study estimating [7% of US adults](http://blogs.worldbank.org/allaboutfinance/why-are-so-many-americans-unbanked) live in unbanked households. It’s certainly outside the norm, but not as uncommon as you obviously believe. I’m not saying that this guy is sane by any stretch of the imagination, nor am I suggesting that a cash only existence is a wise or prudent choice. I’m just saying that it is possible to have a job and pay bills without a bank account. ---
**Author:** ![R.P.McMurphy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7993a0/32.png) [@R.P.McMurphy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/R.P.McMurphy)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/15 "2012-11-09T07:31:35Z")
> [@Jake\_Jones](#): > > Presumably with the cash the bank gave him when he closed his bank accounts. You can buy money orders practically everywhere. Every US Post Office in the country and almost every supermarket, drugstore or convenience store. You don’t need a bank account to buy a money order. That’s kind of the point of a money order, in fact. > A mysterious financial instrument known as a “paycheck.” One can take this promissory note to the financial institution that it is drawn from and exchange it for hard currency, which can then be exchanged for goods and services, including money orders. Checks can also be cashed at third party companies known cryptically as “check cashing services.” Two months ago, the FDIC released a study estimating [7% of US adults](http://blogs.worldbank.org/allaboutfinance/why-are-so-many-americans-unbanked) live in unbanked households. It’s certainly outside the norm, but not as uncommon as you obviously believe. > > I’m not saying that this guy is sane by any stretch of the imagination, nor am I suggesting that a cash only existence is a wise or prudent choice. I’m just saying that it is possible to have a job and pay bills without a bank account. Cummon Jake. Those 7% morons take the check to a check cashing service because they have no bank account. The “service” then rips them off to a tune that no government tax would ever get close to (but that the banks want if they could just get away from those pesky regulations). ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 7:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/16 "2012-11-09T07:34:47Z")
I think Obama should have run on this platform. **"Obama 2012. No more fooling around. This time we’re really going to kill everyone."** ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/17 "2012-11-09T07:41:49Z")
> [@Jake\_Jones](#): > > A mysterious financial instrument known as a “paycheck.” One can take this promissory note to the financial institution that it is drawn from and exchange it for hard currency, which can then be exchanged for goods and services, including money orders. Of course that can be a touch inconvenient when the bank that issued the check is in another state. I ran into this problem once within my state. I worked in downstate New York and had a local bank. I transferred to western New York and was issued a paycheck there. My bank from the downstate area didn’t have a local branch. But not a problem, I just took the paycheck to Key Bank, which was the issuing bank and has branches throughout the state. Apparently not. I was informed at the Key Bank branch I went to that they were Key Bank Western Region. The paycheck had been issued by Key Bank Central Region and I would have to have it cashed at one of those branches, the closest of which was a four hour drive away. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/18 "2012-11-09T07:51:01Z")
One wonders if this is a troll having fun with these guys. Seriously, when even the Freepers tell you you’re too much of a right-wing nut, you’ve got some serious issues. ---
**Author:** ![Jake\_Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Jake\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jake_Jones)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 9:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/19 "2012-11-09T09:17:02Z")
> [@R.P.McMurphy](#): > > Cummon Jake. Those 7% morons take the check to a check cashing service because they have no bank account. Yes, the 7% of US adults living in unbanked households do not have bank accounts. Quite astute. > [@](#): > > The “service” then rips them off to a tune that no government tax would ever get close to (but that the banks want if they could just get away from those pesky regulations). You have no fucking idea what you’re talking about. Dedicated check cashing businesses charge around 2%. Walmart will cash checks up to $1000 for $3. Up to $5000 for $6. It’s really nice for you that you’re [part of the 1%](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=15659395#post15659395) and need not only US bank accounts, but also accounts in Switzerland, the Cayman Islands and Bermuda. I don’t want to make your extremely wealthy head explode, but I’d like you to consider the fact that there exist people in this country who are too poor to afford a checking account. People who do better financially by paying Walmart $3 every week or two than they would by opening a bank account. Some of them even have jobs and pay bills. And they aren’t all morons. ---
**Author:** ![Sandwich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/22d042/32.png) [@Sandwich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sandwich)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454/20 "2012-11-09T13:29:53Z")
I’m voting "troll’. From the opening line “Today, I instructed my wife…” it’s all just too good to be true. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/preparing-for-post-obama-election-kookoo-watch/640454.md?page=2)