# Private messages **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [October 28, 2004, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/private-messages/271735 "2004-10-28T21:25:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2004, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/private-messages/271735/1 "2004-10-28T21:25:37Z")
Why disable PM’s? There’s someone I’d like to have a private word with. Why don’t you allow this? Other boards permit it. ---
**Author:** ![Berkut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a88e57/32.png) [@Berkut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Berkut)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2004, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/private-messages/271735/2 "2004-10-28T22:24:38Z")
From [FAQ - technical issues - please read this BEFORE posting a question](http://207.97.195.229/sdmb/showthread.php?t=103503) > [@](#): > > Q: Why can’t I do (some vBulletin action)? > A: We have disabled the following features at our message board. Some were disabled because they were abused in the past; some because we thought the usage might become abused in the future; some to protect the privacy of our members; some due to site speed considerations; and some for other reasons. Below is a list of disabled features: > > ``` > * post attachments > * e-mail to friend > * "rating" threads > * editing own posts > * deleting own posts > * close threads > * delete threads > * post polls > ***private messaging** > * site calendar > * viewing who's online, and IP addresses > * avatars > * images in post > * HTML > * displaying logged in users > * show users browsing fora > * Ignoring of moderators > * Members list > * "shouting" in titles (all uppercase titles) > > ``` ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2004, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/private-messages/271735/3 "2004-10-29T00:26:18Z")
That only tells me that PM’s have been disabled - it doesn’t say why. I’ve seen the arguments for most of the other disabled features, and understand the reasons - even if I don’t agree with all of them, but PM’s? ---
**Author:** ![Berkut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a88e57/32.png) [@Berkut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Berkut)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2004, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/private-messages/271735/4 "2004-10-29T00:55:23Z")
I’m pretty sure it’s because of the potential for abuse, and site speed considerations. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2004, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/private-messages/271735/5 "2004-10-29T01:27:44Z")
The focus of the site, to save **TubaDiva** having to repeat it for the Nteenth time, is on post content. It generally runs at the maximum the available processing resources will allow – whenever they’re upgraded, it follows Parkinson’s Law and grows to use all available resources. PM’s are a useful part of the VBB software, and can be quite valuable in certain circumstances. But they do put significant strain on the server – each PM is technically a thread by its lonesome, which only sender and receiver can read – and what value they might be to this board and its staff and membership is negated by the necessity to maximize public use of server resources. I’ve been pleasantly surprised at the Chicago Reader’s willingness to continue its investment in this board over the last 5.5 years, and appreciate their generosity immensely. Nonetheless, they don’t have the resources to buy the kind of server setup that allowing all the bells and whistles VBB permits would require. Are you willing to be timed out on every third post, to allow PMs or avatars? That’s effectively the choice to be made – and I think that CR and SDMB staff have made the right choice, given the realities of the situation. ---
**Author:** ![Duderdude2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cdc98d/32.png) [@Duderdude2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duderdude2)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2004, 7:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/private-messages/271735/6 "2004-10-29T07:02:41Z")
> [@Polycarp](#): > > Are you willing to be timed out on every third post, to allow PMs or avatars? It’d be like old times. ---
**Author:** ![C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b2d939/32.png) [@C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C_K_Dexter_Haven)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2004, 11:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/private-messages/271735/7 "2004-10-29T11:38:23Z")
I don’t know the tech stuff, I believe **Polycarp**. However, I do know that you can send emails, which are essentially a “private messages” – at least, you can send 'em to anyone who wants to receive 'em. ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2004, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/private-messages/271735/8 "2004-10-29T17:29:13Z")
Okay, I’ve read the justifications so far, and I don’t find them convincing. \*\* But they do put significant strain on the server \*\* Really? But I could, in theory, post the message on the boards. Is there any difference there, in terms of resources? Does it cost more resources to send a PM than a public post? \*\*The focus of the site, to save TubaDiva having to repeat it for the Nteenth time, is on post content. \*\* and \*\* each PM is technically a thread by its lonesome, which only sender and receiver can read \*\* Are you saying that PM’s go against the philosophy of the board? I see how someone might make that argument, but I don’t agree. If I were to post a message directed at one specific individual others might find that more objectionable. And what would be the appropriate forum? Besides, I might want a private chat with a specific individual containing information that is nobody’s business but ours, which I don’t feel like sharing in public. \*\*However, I do know that you can send emails, which are essentially a “private messages” – at least, you can send 'em to anyone who wants to receive 'em. \*\* I think that emails have much greater potential for abuse than PMs. If I made my email public, any nutcase with a grudge might flame me with anonymous hate mail. Tracing it back to an individual, and taking action could prove impossible. If somebody sent threatening PMs to me, I could complain to the mods, and appropriate action could be taken. I, personally, am not willing to publish my email, but would be willing to accept PMs. ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2004, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/private-messages/271735/9 "2004-10-29T18:06:54Z")
> [@Peter Morris](#): > > I think that emails have much greater potential for abuse than PMs. If I made my email public, any nutcase with a grudge might flame me with anonymous hate mail. Are you planning to incite someone to send you hate mail? :dubious: You don’t have to use your “real” e-mail address here. I have a separate freemail account that I use for the Dope (Scarlett67@ . . . instead of my regular account with my real name in it) and check about once a week. I almost never get any mail in it, unless I’ve asked someone to e-mail me. ---
**Author:** ![Garfield226](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Garfield226](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Garfield226)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2004, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/private-messages/271735/10 "2004-10-29T18:32:51Z")
I look at it as, The Reader doesn’t want to pay for my having a private conversation with someone else. What benefit would they derive from that, where it would be in their interests to devote their limited server resources to hosting space for individuals to converse privately? They wouldn’t. The draw here, at least in my opinion, is the wealth of knowledge available and the community. If you post something, the odds are that SOMEONE here will know something about what you’re talking about. We see each other around in our own groups (if you hang out in GD and GQ, you recognize those folks who hang out there as well), we recognize them, we get to know them. Those aspects, I believe, are two of the main draws of this site. Private conversations accomplish neither of these (a community takes more than two people). Anything that can be accomplished by private messaging can be accomplished by email, with the added benefit of not putting ANY strain on the servers (no matter how little extra it might or might not be…additionally YOU might send and receive one or two PMs per day, but multiply that by 2,000 and take into account that I’m sure some people would use it extensively if it was offered). Finally, I don’t believe that the moderators would like to have to try to deal with moderating personal conversations and disputes. I don’t think they generally like doing it publicly on the boards, but then add in the whole private message, one on one thing, and I think they wouldn’t want to touch that with a ten foot pole.