# Pro bono bullshit **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 9, 2010, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pro-bono-bullshit/553132 "2010-09-09T02:43:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 1\ **Showing post:** 847
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pro-bono-bullshit/553132/847 "2010-09-23T14:33:00Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > However, your repeated insistence of “BUT YOU PROMISED” sounds much more childish to me. 1.) Do you think a good parent makes promises and breaks them? 2.) The childish phrasing is \*your \*representation of our position. You’re a lawyer–if someone is prosecuted for breaking a contract, what is that but a grown-up version of “BUT YOU PROMISED”? > [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > Also, the email referenced in my OP shows that my firm recognizes that pro bono isn’t a requurement. There you go with that fucking strawman again. **Nobody here is saying it’s a requirement, in the sense that if you don’t do it there will be some concrete sanction.** It’s pissing me off so much that every time you continue to make that claim, I’m going to ask you if you’ve stoped raping your daughter yet. > [@Euphonious\_Polemic](#): > > Oh, and kudos to everyone here for the extremely high quality of the poetry, as well as the amazing restraint shown by the relative paucity of boner jokes. Shit, I \*knew \*I was forgetting something! > [@moejoe](#): > > You know, (and I say this only because I’m quite sure it won’t bother you a bit) I’ve never really liked you. I have no idea why either, just didn’t. Probably because I’m often arrogant and abrasive. > [@](#): > > But this has completely changed my mind. Huzzah! Better living through poetry. > [@](#): > > I…I love you man. Not a man. But I appreciate the sentiment. > [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > Man? No man has thighs like these (and believe me, I’ve checked) You’re fooling no one, **Rand**. Everyone can see that as soon as you saw that picture, you had your tongue jammed so far up my ass you could taste what I was still chewing. You didn’t start blustering about fat thighs until considerably after I’d cut you off at the knees. In fact, let’s use the magic of the internet to see exactly how hard you were slobbering: > [@Heeeeeeeeey FATTIES](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heeeeeeeeey-fatties/531465/215): > > Holy shit SfG, I had no idea you were a female person (and an attractive one based on one odd-angled costumed picture). > > I think I may be in love with you. > > How do you feel about liberal douches? Maybe we could get together and raise a horde of babies that are rude to fatties and liberal douches on the internet. (I’m married, and olygamy is not yet legal in my state, but I’m sure we can find a way to make it work). > [@Heeeeeeeeey FATTIES](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heeeeeeeeey-fatties/531465/388): > > Nah, for me it was the personality–the pic was just icing on the cake. And then after I unequivocably expressed that the very idea of you being attracted to me was nauseous, you launched into further pleading: > [@Heeeeeeeeey FATTIES](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heeeeeeeeey-fatties/531465/647): > > ☹ > > Don’t you realize we are two peas in the very same pod? You yell at and about fatties who whine without taking personal responsibility, and I yell at and about poor people who whine without taking personal responsibility. People think you hate fatties just for being fatties, and they think I hate poor people just for being poor. > > We should join together for the greater good of humanity! We could find whiny irresponsible poor fatties and give them a double dose of dis pimpin’! --- _[View the full topic](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pro-bono-bullshit/553132)._