# Pssst: All the Americans are away eating turkey **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 24, 2011, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968 "2011-11-24T14:15:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/1 "2011-11-24T14:15:12Z")
Now’s our chance to take over the SDMB. Where do we begin? ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Dr.Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Drake)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/2 "2011-11-24T14:16:55Z")
Raid the storehouse of knowledge! ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/3 "2011-11-24T14:26:36Z")
It’s 8 in the morning. Exactly how long do you guys think the american thanksgiving dinner is? ---
**Author:** ![Sally\_Mander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e56c9b/32.png) [@Sally\_Mander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sally_Mander)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/4 "2011-11-24T14:27:58Z")
We’re not all away. Holy cow, it’s only 9:30 in the morning on the East Coast! Besides, we took all the good silver with us, and anything else of value has already been stolen or is nailed down. (I checked) ---
**Author:** ![Canadjun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/76d3ee/32.png) [@Canadjun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadjun)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/5 "2011-11-24T14:31:49Z")
If all the Americans are goofing off because they think it’s Thanksgiving (even though they are over a month late) wouldn’t that mean that there would be lots more of them on SDMB spoiling our fun? ---
**Author:** ![Lancia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lancia/32/17174_2.png) [@Lancia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lancia)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/6 "2011-11-24T14:42:15Z")
Not all Americans are off eating turkey. I certainly am not. In fact, TPTB have left me in charge of security. However, because they didn’t ask me if I wanted to work on Thanksgiving and the bosses are gone, I’m going to fire up a cigar and kick back with a _Penthouse_. Y’all have a blast, and be good 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Wallenstein](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5a626/32.png) [@Wallenstein](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wallenstein)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/7 "2011-11-24T14:48:55Z")
I’m going to start by replacing all those missing "U"s and switching “-ize” with “-ise”. Also going to change “Straight Dope Chicago” for “Straight Dope Royal Leamington Spa”. ---
**Author:** ![One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/838e76/32.png) [@One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/One_And_Only_Wanderers)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/8 "2011-11-24T14:51:12Z")
I began by poisoning the turkey! ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/9 "2011-11-24T15:02:01Z")
We burning your turkey! ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/10 "2011-11-24T15:04:25Z")
I’ll be back in a second. I left something in the boot of my motor and I have to take the lift downstairs to get it. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/11 "2011-11-24T15:09:10Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > I’ll be back in a second. I left something in the boot of my motor and I have to take the lift downstairs to get it. That’s some colourful language for a Canadian. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/12 "2011-11-24T15:42:42Z")
> [@One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](#): > > I began by poisoning the turkey! You _can’t_ poison our turkey; you are neither a Diplomat nor a Spy unit. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/13 "2011-11-24T16:00:25Z")
The metrication starts… _now_. ---
**Author:** ![BlackKnight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eb8c5e/32.png) [@BlackKnight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlackKnight)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/14 "2011-11-24T16:37:17Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > The metrication starts… _now_. You and your metric system can go kilogram sand! :eek: My god … I’m too late … ---
**Author:** ![OttoDaFe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ottodafe/32/356_2.png) [@OttoDaFe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OttoDaFe)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/15 "2011-11-24T16:37:52Z")
> [@Wallenstein](#): > > I’m going to start by replacing all those missing "U"s and switching “-ize” with “-ise”. > > Also going to change “Straight Dope Chicago” for “Straight Dope Royal Leamington Spa”. Which is pronounced “Straight Dope Throatwarbler Mangrove.” Some of us don’t particularly like turkey. Others (including yr obt svt) find the idea of crowding elbow-to-elbow around a table with people you don’t particularly like and stuffing yourself till you’re about to be sick\* less than entrancing. So we’re left to guard the fort. Just try to loot it quietly, okay? \*Uncle Dildo’s favo(u)rite maxim, “It takes a heap o’ vittles to gag a boggie,” comes to mind here. ---
**Author:** ![Molesworth\_2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9dc877/32.png) [@Molesworth\_2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Molesworth_2)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/16 "2011-11-24T16:42:42Z")
Initiate the Doomsday Device. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/17 "2011-11-24T17:06:20Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > We burning your turkey! Trust me, Mom has that already taken care of. ---
**Author:** ![NinjaChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/18 "2011-11-24T17:09:42Z")
This American is celebrating Thanksgiving by spending a long weekend in London. So there. (You guys win, though - since when the hell does the Circle line dump you in Hammersmith instead of, you know, going in damn _circle_? That was a fun extra two train changes.) ---
**Author:** ![gregorio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/fbc32d/32.png) [@gregorio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gregorio)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/19 "2011-11-24T17:09:48Z")
Can’t talk. Apparently they like to play a certain song on this day. I’ll be back in ten minutes or so. ---
**Author:** ![MOIDALIZE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@MOIDALIZE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MOIDALIZE)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968/20 "2011-11-24T17:11:03Z")
> [@Canadjun](#): > > If all the Americans are goofing off because they think it’s Thanksgiving (even though they are over a month late) wouldn’t that mean that there would be lots more of them on SDMB spoiling our fun? Canada has already spoiled all of America’s fun by sending Nickelback to perform at halftime of the Lions-Packers game today. What did we ever do to you to deserve this? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pssst-all-the-americans-are-away-eating-turkey/603968.md?page=2)