# Psst...hey, buddy....maybe you've seen an F-35 fighter jet someplace 'round here?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [September 18, 2023, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295 "2023-09-18T04:11:30Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![chappachula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@chappachula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chappachula)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/1 "2023-09-18T04:11:30Z")

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Just wonderin’, ya know…  
Because the army lost one someplace in South Carolina, and can’t find it.  
.

> **[A pilot training in one of America's most expensive weapons systems ejected...](https://www.businessinsider.com/f35-jet-lost-usmc-marine-pilot-south-carolina-training-mishap-2023-9)**
>
> A representative for the United States Marine Corps told Insider that a "mishap" occurred during a Sunday training flight, resulting in the lost jet.

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**Author:** ![Walken\_After\_Midnight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b487fb/32.png) [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walken_After_Midnight)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/2 "2023-09-18T04:19:30Z")

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Here are the X’s, formerly known as tweets, from Charleston Air Force Base:

> <https://twitter.com/TeamCharleston/status/1703523385475534968>

> <https://twitter.com/TeamCharleston/status/1703541506915668242>

They’re from a few hours ago.

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**Author:** ![markn\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@markn\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markn_1)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/3 "2023-09-18T04:23:25Z")

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> the jets have a powerful electronic intelligence, surveillance, and reconnaissance suite.

For $1.7 trillion, maybe they should throw in an AirTag too.

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**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/4 "2023-09-18T04:23:51Z")

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So, hypothetically, suppose that I had a… friend, named, let’s say, Joey Jo Jo Junior Shabadoo, who happened to find said plane on his property and decided it was his property now and towed it back to his garage.

How much trouble would he be in? Hypothetically, of course, because I certainly don’t need an answer within the next 15 minutes or anything.

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**Author:** ![Walken\_After\_Midnight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b487fb/32.png) [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walken_After_Midnight)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/5 "2023-09-18T04:28:57Z")

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Jim Jordan’s House Judiciary Committee have blamed the incident on Joe Biden’s military being “woke”. No, seriously.

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**Author:** ![Walken\_After\_Midnight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b487fb/32.png) [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walken_After_Midnight)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/6 "2023-09-18T04:41:16Z")

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One possibility is that it’s crashed, perhaps into a lake. Another possibility is that it’s flying around on autopilot and in stealth mode.

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**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/7 "2023-09-18T05:09:19Z")

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> [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](#):
>
> Jim Jordan’s House Judiciary Committee have blamed the incident on Joe Biden’s military being “woke”. No, seriously.

Well, it is a transsonic jet.

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/8 "2023-09-18T05:16:35Z")

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Nah. Aliens 👽

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**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/9 "2023-09-18T06:05:16Z")

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From N. Charleston area Craigslist (via [pprune.org](http://pprune.org)):

> No lowballers, I know what I got. Must be U.S. citizen to bid. Ran when parked.

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**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 8:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/10 "2023-09-18T08:13:54Z")

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> [@Smapti](#):
>
> So, hypothetically, suppose that I had a… friend, named, let’s say, Joey Jo Jo Junior Shabadoo, who happened to find said plane on his property and decided it was his property now and towed it back to his garage.
> 
> How much trouble would he be in? Hypothetically, of course, because I certainly don’t need an answer within the next 15 minutes or anything.

From what I understand, it would be a crime to knowingly possess US military material this way. A few years ago there was one incident where apparently some debris fell off an F-117 in flight or something and some people were talking about keeping it as souvenirs and they would have been in deep legal shit if they did.

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**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/11 "2023-09-18T08:15:30Z")

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> [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](#):
>
> Jim Jordan’s House Judiciary Committee have blamed the incident on Joe Biden’s military being “woke”. No, seriously.

Did they happen to mention which particular “woke” trait it is that is behind this incident and how it is responsible? I’ve been trying to figure it out on my own, but I’m coming up empty.

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**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/12 "2023-09-18T08:15:46Z")

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> <https://twitter.com/Nash076/status/1703616090507461083>
>
> Joint Base Charleston @TeamCharleston

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**Author:** ![chappachula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@chappachula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chappachula)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 8:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/13 "2023-09-18T08:43:26Z")

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from a [news report](https://avgeekery.com/f-35-pilot-ejects-over-charleston-ends-up-at-a-house-for-help/rt)  
“the pilot made it out safely, and then showed up a few miles away in a backyard of a residential neighborhood in North Charleston. The weather was horrible at the time of the accident, but unclear if that played any part.”

I’m trying to imagine the homeowner, looking out of her kitchen window, and seeing a man in a wet flight suit and helmet/oxygen mask. sitting in the kid’s sandbox. That’s going to be a surprise.

Also, (and a bit more seriously) how does the pilot suddenly show up in the back yard? He had walked a couple miles from the point of ejection…you would think he’d knock on the front door. Even if he is dazed, in shock, or seriously hurt.

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**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 8:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/14 "2023-09-18T08:47:36Z")

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> [@chappachula](#):
>
> Also, (and a bit more seriously) how does the pilot suddenly show up in the back yard? He had walked a couple miles from the point of ejection…you would think he’d knock on the front door.

Perhaps the “back yard” is an unfenced area adjacent to a greenbelt?

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**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 8:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/15 "2023-09-18T08:49:14Z")

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> [@chappachula](#):
>
> I’m trying to imagine the homeowner, looking out of her kitchen window, and seeing a man in a wet flight suit and helmet/oxygen mask. sitting in the kid’s sandbox. That’s going to be a surprise.

I’m sure everyone here has seen this, but here’s Maverick…

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZp1UoqU3oU](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZp1UoqU3oU)

> - Pilot: Where am I?
> - Kid: Earth.

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**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 9:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/16 "2023-09-18T09:36:18Z")

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Missing: One jet. Answers to “Skippy.” Very friendly. Reward if found.

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**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 10:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/17 "2023-09-18T10:39:55Z")

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> [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](#):
>
> Did they happen to mention which particular “woke” trait it is that is behind this incident and how it is responsible? I’ve been trying to figure it out on my own, but I’m coming up empty.

The general claim is that only useless incompetent wimps join the service any more because all the Real Men are repulsed by the woke-itude. With a side dish of “discipline and quality of work has gone in the shitter since it’s no longer permissible to admonish people for mistakes because it might hurt their pwecious snowflake self-esteem.”

It’s fantasy whining by the usual lying liars who lie. But the Reactionary Wacko Traitors just lurve to hear (and repeat) that fake tale of woe.

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**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 10:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/18 "2023-09-18T10:41:56Z")

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> [@chappachula](#):
>
> Also, (and a bit more seriously) how does the pilot suddenly show up in the back yard? He had walked a couple miles from the point of ejection…you would think he’d knock on the front door. Even if he is dazed, in shock, or seriously hurt.

The area is pretty rural. He’s probably walking cross country or across farmers’ fields towards the first house he sees. He happens to approach it from the rear.

You might live in a part of the country where fences around yards are universal. In many other parts, fences around yards are all-but unheard of. Even in dense suburbia, which this was not.

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**Author:** ![smithsb](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smithsb/32/12107_2.png) [@smithsb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smithsb)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/19 "2023-09-18T12:39:51Z")

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[![](https://images.spot.im/image/upload/v200/64f009a6ae94c9a866b90fb73543585f) ](https://images.spot.im/image/upload/v200/64f009a6ae94c9a866b90fb73543585f)

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**Author:** ![Pork\_Rind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pork_rind/32/111_2.png) [@Pork\_Rind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pork_Rind)\
**Post date:** [September 18, 2023, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295/20 "2023-09-18T16:26:10Z")

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> [@Smapti](#):
>
> So, hypothetically, suppose that I had a… friend, named, let’s say, Joey Jo Jo Junior Shabadoo, who happened to find said plane on his property and decided it was his property now and towed it back to his garage.

[moe]That’s the worst name I ever heard.[/moe]

That a jet might behave in unpredictable ways after an ejection totally does not surprise me, especially given how much I love the [Cornfield Bomber](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cornfield_Bomber) story. But in this day and age, the fact that they did not have any kind of telemetry that would have still been active seems… odd. Then again, I had the same thoughts about MH370. In any case, if I found the jet, I’d call up that guy with all the [Pepsi points](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leonard_v._Pepsico,_Inc) and ask if he was still in the market.

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-buddy-maybe-youve-seen-an-f-35-fighter-jet-someplace-round-here/990295.md?page=2)
