# Psst... Hey, restaurant employees (and other service workers)... C'mere. We need to talk. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 26, 2012, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907 "2012-09-26T17:55:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mann\_Slaughter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@Mann\_Slaughter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mann_Slaughter)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/1 "2012-09-26T17:55:57Z")
First… When I walk into your restaurant with my girlfriend please don’t greet us with “Hi guys!” The last time I checked I was the only guy in this relationship. A friendly “Good afternoon, ma’am… sir.” works wonders for us. Second… Young lady, I’m old enough to be your father. You don’t know me, nor are we romantically involved, therefore you don’t get to refer to me as “Hon”, “Dear”, or “Babe”. The same applies to you, young man. I am not your “Bro”, “Bruh” or “Brother”, and as a Black man I find myself offended when you call me that. I’m often tempted to ask them, “Do you call the old White men who come here ‘Brother’?” Third… Can someone in management PLEASE inform your employees that they are not to run the fucking sweeper or vacuum the floor in areas where people are EATING!?!? Last week, my girlfriend and I were having a late breakfast at a small diner. I was halfway through a large, tasty omelet when I happened to glance under the table across the aisle from us. On the floor I saw discarded sugar packets, dust bunnies, and other debris. I called my lady’s attention to it, then said, “Well, at least they’re not pushing the sweeper around.” Why in the Hell did I say that? :smack: Within minutes our waitress came over with a broom and started sweeping that shit from under the table, TOWARDS US, and into the aisle. I set my fork down, and gave my lady my best Can-you-believe-this-shit? look. After the waitress got the garbage in the aisle about 3 feet from us, she came back with the FUCKING SWEEPER to pick it up! I was done! I left half of my large, tasty omelet on my plate, uneaten. No way was I going to finish it after that woman had just stirred up enough dust to choke “Pig-Pen”! ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/2 "2012-09-26T17:59:11Z")
With all due respect, you sound like a giant pain in the ass customer that restaurants would be better off without. They can’t win. You complain about stuff being left on the floor and people cleaning around you in the same rant. If you are there for a late breakfast, when do you think they are going to prepare the place for lunch? ---
**Author:** ![Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Living_Well_Is_Best_Revenge)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/3 "2012-09-26T18:06:49Z")
I am with you on the sweeping around the table while you eat business. But get a grip with the “bro, hon, babe” stuff. You aren’t at a 5-star restaurant. You were at a casual diner. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/4 "2012-09-26T18:10:54Z")
I will sometimes call a group of all women “you guys.” I should probably stop doing that; the tears in the fabric of reality that occur when I do so really chafe my skin. ---
**Author:** ![Cyros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a698b9/32.png) [@Cyros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyros)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/5 "2012-09-26T18:13:57Z")
umadbro? ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/6 "2012-09-26T18:14:36Z")
Servers who sit down while taking the order piss me off. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/7 "2012-09-26T18:15:52Z")
Do you tip? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![saje](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saje/32/3631_2.png) [@saje](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saje)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/8 "2012-09-26T18:20:05Z")
I’m female, 50, and I say “you guys” all the time to people of both genders. I’m a wee bit bothered by “hon” and “dearie” etc, but currently I live in the south so it sort of goes with the territory. At least they’re paying some attention to me and are trying to be friendly - beats the grunt and the no eye contact and no smile any day. Oddly enough “Hey, girl” bugs me more than anything, and even that I can shrug off. Life’s too short to spend one’s days irritated at other’s mannerisms. Also, when the person came to sweep the stuff up, did you actually ASK if she’d wait a bit? Because if she was paying attention to her sweeping her eyes were on the floor and she didn’t see your outraged looks. Last I knew restaurant staff were not psychic… ---
**Author:** ![redtail23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/3e96dc/32.png) [@redtail23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/redtail23)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/9 "2012-09-26T18:21:08Z")
First, get over yourself. I’m hardly a young kid, and everyone I know\* uses “guys” regardless of gender. Second, get over yourself. Waitresses having been using casual endearments since the dark ages. Count yourself lucky that it’s a friendly young girl calling you “honey” rather than a whiskey-voiced ancient crone. And yes, that waiter _does_ call the old white guys “Bro” or “Bruh” or whatever. Evidently you’ve completely missed the last decade, when this has become a common form of address. It is incredibly annoying. It is not, however, racially motivated. Third, yeah, that is nasty. I’ve had 'em want to run the sweeper _under my feet_!!! **Shagnasty** , they can sweep _unoccupied_ areas of the restaurant during off-hours - they don’t need to be sweeping right next to customers. Many restaurants handle this concept; not understanding it speaks of poor management. \*Except this one co-worker I had one time, who was…special…and a regal PITA to deal with. She is the only person I have ever met IRL who fussed over this wording. In fact, now that I think about it, it was the exact same circumstance - a casual greeting in a casual restaurant by a service person. Of course, that was almost 20 years ago… ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/10 "2012-09-26T18:22:22Z")
Wow, service has really slipped at the French Laundry. ---
**Author:** ![Leaper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4bbf92/32.png) [@Leaper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaper)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/11 "2012-09-26T18:23:23Z")
> [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](#): > > I am with you on the sweeping around the table while you eat business. But get a grip with the “bro, hon, babe” stuff. You aren’t at a 5-star restaurant. You were at a casual diner. True, but I personally find it condescending. I’ve never called anyone out on it, but I have felt condescended to by some of the things waitstaff have done (knelt in front of the table to get into level eye contact with me, ways they’ve addressed me, etc). Probably 'cause I’m a short dude. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/12 "2012-09-26T18:44:32Z")
I once got annoyed with a waiter at Claim Jumper constantly calling me “boss,” and asked him not to do it. He complied, and no more needed to be said. And the first time I visited the Outback Steakhouse in my neighborhood, I had to call the manager over and ask him to put a stop to the waitress sitting down next to me to write up our order. He complied, and no more needed to be said. OP, did you speak with management about the things that distressed you? ---
**Author:** ![Sister\_Vigilante](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@Sister\_Vigilante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sister_Vigilante)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/13 "2012-09-26T18:46:51Z")
The only problem I have with servers in restaurants is when they: 1. Try to seat me next to a baby in an otherwise empty restaurant. 2. Don’t keep my drink filled. 3. Don’t write our order down. WRITE THAT SHIT DOWN! You’re not impressing me with your memorization skills, you make me worry that something will go wrong. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/14 "2012-09-26T18:49:31Z")
> [@redtail23](#): > > Count yourself lucky that it’s a friendly young girl calling you “honey” rather than a whiskey-voiced ancient crone. Watch your language, dearie, both MeanOldLady and I are \*bourbon \*drinkers. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/15 "2012-09-26T18:53:27Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > With all due respect, you sound like a giant pain in the ass customer that restaurants would be better off without. They can’t win. You complain about stuff being left on the floor and people cleaning around you in the same rant. If you are there for a late breakfast, when do you think they are going to prepare the place for lunch? This. You sound like a cranky old man. I have no problem complaining about things that need to be complained about, but sheesh, maybe you could relax a bit. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/16 "2012-09-26T19:00:44Z")
After the patronizing tone the title takes, I have no interest in determining whether any of his complaints have merit. As far as I’m concerned, the OP can sit on his advice and spin and that’s courtesy of a non-food service or retail worker. ---
**Author:** ![Labrador\_Deceiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7c8e57/32.png) [@Labrador\_Deceiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Labrador_Deceiver)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/17 "2012-09-26T19:44:49Z")
> [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](#): > > Watch your language, dearie, both MeanOldLady and I are \*bourbon \*drinkers. 1. Bourbon is whiskey B) I thought MOL preferred scotch. No? 1. I’m sure the restaurant was more than happy to see our beloved OP walk away. ---
**Author:** ![Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Living_Well_Is_Best_Revenge)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/18 "2012-09-26T19:53:49Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > I once got annoyed with a waiter at Claim Jumper constantly calling me “boss,” and asked him not to do it. He complied, and no more needed to be said. > > And the first time I visited the Outback Steakhouse in my neighborhood, I had to call the manager over and ask him to put a stop to the waitress sitting down next to me to write up our order. He complied, and no more needed to be said. > > OP, did you speak with management about the things that distressed you? You sound like a blast to go out to dinner with. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/19 "2012-09-26T20:05:41Z")
I’m surprised you are able to sit down in a restaurant with that giant stick poking out of your ass. ---
**Author:** ![It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/it_s_not_rocket_surgery/32/312_2.png) [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Not_Rocket_Surgery)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907/20 "2012-09-26T20:13:57Z")
A few years ago, we were eating at an Outback after spending the day packing for a move. It was late, but not that late; nevertheless, we were the only customers in the section at that time. A worker came in with a sweeper and started doing the floors, which was fine - until he tried to sweep under our table. My wife asked him if he could wait until we were done. He replied “No, I can’t”. Fuck that. We wrote to corporate, who ended up sending us a $50 gift card. I could have dealt with it at a fast food joint, but not where the meals cost $20+/plate. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/psst-hey-restaurant-employees-and-other-service-workers-cmere-we-need-to-talk/635907.md?page=2)