# Purple is moving to .. somewhere

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [October 27, 2019, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550 "2019-10-27T11:54:02Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\
**Post date:** [October 27, 2019, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/1 "2019-10-27T11:54:02Z")

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Decided to get off the endless merry-go-round of the same damn arguments & frustrations, and broke up with my I.T.Guy and - like any good drunk who’s swearing off it for good - this time, I mean it!

I want to get out of this city, badly & for lots of different reasons, and our lease is up in a couple months. Plus _scratches back of head sheepishly_ I, uh, managed to lost my job recently. I don’t think I’ve ever been term’d before. Hmph.

So anyway, now there’s absolutely nothing keeping me here. All circumstances collided, plus I turn 40 next summer and suspect a bit of a mid life crisis is happening.

I’m heading out on my own, for the 1st time in my life.

I’m packing my shit, and trying to find a new job while also planning a move to … I haven’t quite decided yet. Spinning my wheels because I don’t have a job so don’t quite know what to budget for rent, and I haven’t picked a place yet so … gah!

No real support system, at least not locally, although I reached out to a bunch of girlfriends and got several job leads & related advice, so that was helpful.

Mostly, I have little money and no savings, though unemployment will provide at least a trickle for a few weeks.

But reckless as it seems (and I am terrified, y’all) I also feel like, I dunno, like I have to do this.

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**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\
**Post date:** [October 27, 2019, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/2 "2019-10-27T12:03:00Z")

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Good luck.

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**Author:** ![saje](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saje/32/3631_2.png) [@saje](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saje)\
**Post date:** [October 27, 2019, 12:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/3 "2019-10-27T12:05:38Z")

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It sounds scary but exciting too. You are a resourceful and intelligent soul, you can get this done. The nice thing about getting a job is that you don’t have to keep it if you don’t like it, so my (unasked-for, granted) advice would be to take a reasonable sounding job to help you get a bit settled, and when you can see a path for yourself you can find a different job if you want to.

I think this shake up is a good thing, truly.

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**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\
**Post date:** [October 27, 2019, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/4 "2019-10-27T13:15:05Z")

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Best vibes and hopes for you. Use the unemployment safety and when you do jump just keep your eyes and heart open. Again, like dating, don’t carry your frustrations from last time along to next time.

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [October 27, 2019, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/5 "2019-10-27T20:39:46Z")

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Really, good luck. Avail yourself of services you may qualify for. There’s no shame if you’re in real need.

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**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\
**Post date:** [October 27, 2019, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/6 "2019-10-27T21:12:26Z")

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Well purple, if you ultimately decide to move to the northwest my earlier offer still stands. And if it got right down to the stickey end, I got a couch you could surf on for a bit whilst getting sorted. If you decide to come up here after all that is.

What was it you were doing for income? I know you said but I’m lazy

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**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\
**Post date:** [October 27, 2019, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/7 "2019-10-27T21:41:26Z")

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Good luck. Leaving Texas is always a good idea. But you really do have to make the leap before you can land on your feet. The second time I moved to Thailand was in my 30s with just $1000 in my pocket, and it worked out well. Same with my other moves including back to Hawaii a second time in my late 50s. Always best to be on the ground where you’re going to end up. Hell, the vast majority of companies in Hawaii won’t even look at your application unless you’re already physically present in the state.

Good luck! And don’t forget to write.

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**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\
**Post date:** [October 27, 2019, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/8 "2019-10-27T21:47:48Z")

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I won’t let you leave my love behind. No, I won’t let you leeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEave.

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**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\
**Post date:** [October 28, 2019, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/9 "2019-10-28T01:18:07Z")

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Takes stones and I’m proud of you for doing it. Sometimes the best thing you can do is blow it all up and rebuild it from the rubble. You may not know what you’ll get but you know what you have is bad.

Charleston, SC, where I am has a local unemployment rate under 2%. I’m glad to help if you’ll give me some idea of what you do/want to do.

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**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\
**Post date:** [October 28, 2019, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/10 "2019-10-28T02:28:50Z")

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Nice thing about being unemployed is all the free time you have for important things.

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**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\
**Post date:** [October 28, 2019, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/11 "2019-10-28T06:17:39Z")

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Yeah. Like trying to decide where the fuck I’m going, and what the fuck I’m gonna do when I get there.

And packing. I have been somewhat more successful in that department.

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**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\
**Post date:** [October 28, 2019, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/12 "2019-10-28T08:14:35Z")

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Lets see, didn’t you say you’ve been doing tech support of some kind over the phone?

It ain’t glamorous but…I’m halfway ashamed to suggest it, in part because it feels like I’m trying to convince you to do something you’re not inclined to, but here goes

Boise has verizon and an atnt(?) call centers. Not far from OR and a dispensary, granted the politics probably aren’t to your liking but me n begbert both live here and there are quite a few dopers scattered throughout the NW. Living arrangements, I’m sure something can be done, like I said earlier, worse comes to worse you crash with me for a while till things get sorted.

Despite all that, I am NOT trying to sell you on moving here, just showing that there are options and help if you aak for it

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**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\
**Post date:** [October 29, 2019, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/13 "2019-10-29T00:06:07Z")

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Good for you! Well, not good about losing the job, and not good about break-up, but good that you are now mostly encumbrance free, YOU are free!

My advice is look for the area you want to live, start sending out resumes and looking for a place to stay as soon as you are done applying for unemployment.

BTW, unemployment is kinda tricky if you have been termed instead of laid off. If/when you are denied, appeal with your reasons you shouldn’t have been termed, but also file weekly claims .Your last company will say, nope, termination was justified and you will get another denial. Appeal that with more reasons and any documentation you have and continue to file weekly claims. By this time, your last company will have given up, so you will get back pay from the time you applied. I’m sure you will have a new job in no time at all, so will feel like dropping your claim, but if you spend an hour a week fighting your denial, you could end up with a really nice check for the time between filing and getting a new job.

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**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\
**Post date:** [October 29, 2019, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/14 "2019-10-29T07:08:25Z")

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Nah. If it makes ya feel better, I was already approved for unemployment.

But I do need to get my ass back onto the applic. for food stamps. It was a looooong beast of a form. I’ll admit, I eventually got fed up & wandered off.

On a side note, applying for jobs means running across the _worst_ friggin’ interface decisions to ever grace an online form.

Today’s winner was a job applic. that asked what foreign languages you might speak/read/write. Huzzah! I got three of those, that oughta impress 'em.

Christ on a cracker. You can only see a single line item (language) as you click down or scroll, through dozens and dozens of options. One. At. A. Time.

Went through all that, and the fuckers didn’t even list Polish as an option. I saw Latvian somewhere up the list; that’s gotta be at least as obscure.

Anyway, I appreciate the support and warm wishes. Moving in the middle of winter from Satan’s humid armpit into the depths of, like, inches of snow should scare me, I guess (well, driving on ice sure does) but mostly it gives me a light case of the giggles. I keep reminding myself, if I don’t like it … hey, it’s not permanent. I can move again.

Ah, and before anyone worries, I already own a decent ski jacket, and a long wool coat, and a down parka, and boots, and several scarves & hats.  
And a space heater, and a warm comforter.

I think I’ll be alright.

… right?

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**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\
**Post date:** [October 29, 2019, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/15 "2019-10-29T07:15:22Z")

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depends on where ya go far as snow, but yeah you should be good

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**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\
**Post date:** [October 29, 2019, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/16 "2019-10-29T08:10:42Z")

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Wow, in the same boat here, sort of. I moved to this town with my daughter and grandsons, 4.5k km away when she was offered a wunnerful job, lots of pay and all our expenses covered. A week before the 3month probation period was up, she was given a letter of termination and told to clear her office within the hour. No reason, no nothing and my daughter was just devastated. Like you, she’d never been sacked from a job in her life.

So here we are in the middle of fucken nowhere, no job for her (I work from home so I’m ok) and as part of her pay-out package, she’s not allowed to contact any of the former company’s ‘clients’ to work for THEM, so that counts out approximately 90% of future job opportunities. It’s a mining town with auxiliary industries, and pretty much every employer is connected in some way.

But they’ve offered her relocation costs to anywhere (except here) and a handsome package…so in a couple of weeks we’re going on a four week holiday to SE Asia while our stuff is moved across the continent. Cheaper to get flights and accom there than here in Aus during that time. And then, we’re going to be in the real tropics instead of the desert, and god knows what will happen after that.

On one hand, I’m getting far too old for this shit. On the other, why not go with the flow and enjoy the ride. Like, what’s the worst that can possibly happen, right?

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**Author:** ![Grim\_Render](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a87d85/32.png) [@Grim\_Render](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grim_Render)\
**Post date:** [October 29, 2019, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/17 "2019-10-29T12:32:53Z")

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The midlife crisis gets bad press, but it can be good to shake you out of a situation thats no longer good for you. I got another degree for mine, worked out well.

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**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\
**Post date:** [October 29, 2019, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/18 "2019-10-29T13:25:22Z")

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Congrats, Purps! I’m enjoying Wisconsin, but I can’t recommend it this morning; woke up to a light dusting of snow. 😕

> [@kambuckta](#):
>
> …as part of her pay-out package, she’s not allowed to contact any of the former company’s ‘clients’ to work for THEM, so that counts out approximately 90% of future job opportunities…

I know in the US of A, those “non-competes” have been struck down in court so many times that companies know not to fight them. She should be okay taking a job with/for her former clients.

> [@](#):
>
> On one hand, I’m getting far too old for this shit. On the other, why not go with the flow and enjoy the ride. Like, what’s the worst that can possibly happen, right?

Amen! I just retired with no plans, let alone a Big Plan, so those words were like therapy. Thanks.

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**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\
**Post date:** [October 29, 2019, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/19 "2019-10-29T14:18:56Z")

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All is impermanence. I sincerely wish you nothing but the best and I suspect as long as you keep that positivity you’ll be OK. This is a really good opportunity to get rid of all the extraneous baggage in your life and focus on what really matters to you.

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**Author:** ![jnglmassiv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f07891/32.png) [@jnglmassiv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jnglmassiv)\
**Post date:** [October 29, 2019, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/purple-is-moving-to-somewhere/842550/20 "2019-10-29T20:05:07Z")

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> [@kambuckta](#):
>
> … as part of her pay-out package, she’s not allowed to contact any of the former company’s ‘clients’ to work for THEM, so that counts out approximately 90% of future job opportunities.

Possible loophole: What if the applicant’s mother contacted the clients?

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