# Put that child in the fucking ambulance, you moron! ! ! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 21, 2010, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944 "2010-06-21T01:45:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Bill\_Door](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@Bill\_Door](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bill_Door)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2010, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/21 "2010-06-22T12:39:38Z")
> [@Bill\_Door](#): > > So if a non-eventful trip to the emergency room in an ambulance and diagnostic tests costs, what, $2,500, and it’s a million to one chance you save a life it ends up costing 2.5 trillion dollars to save a life. On a cost-benefit basis it’s hard to justify. In all fairness to me, I knew it costs 2.5\*10^9 dollars. What I didn’t know was the difference between a trillion and a billion. I blame government spending for blurring the distinction. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2010, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/22 "2010-06-22T13:24:07Z")
> [@Aspidistra](#): > > You know, this wouldn’t be the Dope if somebody weren’t being contrary in a Pit thread. So I guess I’ll step up to the plate. > > Isn’t it possible that the child’s two caregivers, who were apparently much closer to the incident than you were, actually had a better handle on how serious it was than you did? Maybe they did, but what are the odds that they had a better handle on the medical risks than the actual EMTs who came to the scene? I have to say that any parent who deliberately ignores the advice of an emergency medical crew deserves one hell of a bitchslap. ---
**Author:** ![Mk\_VII](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Mk\_VII](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mk_VII)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2010, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/23 "2010-06-22T14:21:37Z")
The club is lucky they are taking so relaxed a view of it, rather than hiring a shyster lawyer and looking for payola. And after the management was alerted to the danger beforehand. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2010, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/24 "2010-06-22T14:52:47Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > Actually, according to my dad, who is a doctor, any head injury that results in loss of consciousness needs to be followed by medical care. As does every person who has received any higher-level first aid training. And evey person who’s not a complete fucking moron. You know, it really cheeses me off that they don’t teach real first aid to kids in school. They may have a little in health class or something, but they should be making sure they learn this stuff. A 1-2 hour session a year, every year, from kindergarten on would make a big difference. Why the hell did I only learn about using well-aimed direct pressure on a wound when I was in a 9-day residential Wilderness First Responder course? That’s stuff that a 6 year old could understand–If you’re bleeding, cover the wound with something and press on it to slow the bleeding. We learned somewhat more sophisticated techniques in WFR training, but it was just an elaboration of that basic concept. People have thought I am some kind of magician because I can stop a cut from bleeding in a minute flat, but all I’m doing is pressing on it. And everybody should be taught from childhood on that a head injury with loss of consciousness ALWAYS should result in a trip to the hospital. Okay, rant over. ---
**Author:** ![markm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de053/32.png) [@markm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markm)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2010, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/25 "2010-06-22T15:31:05Z")
> [@Green\_Bean](#): > > Why the hell did I only learn about using well-aimed direct pressure on a wound when I was in a 9-day residential Wilderness First Responder course? That’s stuff that a 6 year old could understand–If you’re bleeding, cover the wound with something and press on it to slow the bleeding. > > Okay, rant over. Ummm… most kids aren’t taught this sort of thing? Any time we got any kind of cut or scrape as a kid, that’s exactly what mom drilled into us. Rinse out the wound then apply pressure. And my gf has taught her kids this, so I just assumed it was one of those things parents teach their kids. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2010, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/26 "2010-06-22T15:58:15Z")
> [@Bill\_Door](#): > > So if a non-eventful trip to the emergency room in an ambulance and diagnostic tests costs, what, $2,500, and it’s a million to one chance you save a life it ends up costing 2.5 trillion dollars to save a life. On a cost-benefit basis it’s hard to justify. But you don’t know if you’re the one person who is going to die. Plus, there could be other injuries as **MsRobyn** pointed out. A layperson just isn’t going to know what to look for. **markm** –you mean your parents’ reaction to cuts wasn’t, “Walk it off” Or “Are you bleeding to death? No? You’re fine”? 🙂 I keed… ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2010, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/27 "2010-06-22T21:57:09Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > \ > > **markm** –you mean your parents’ reaction to cuts wasn’t, “Walk it off” Or “Are you bleeding to death? No? You’re fine”? 🙂 I keed… “I’ll give you something to cry about” or “What did you do that for?” ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2010, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/28 "2010-06-22T22:01:57Z")
\*\*TruCelt \*\* --write a letter to the editor of the newspaper nearest this club. Explain exactly what you saw. Understate it. ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/29 "2010-06-23T04:08:40Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > one in a million **Bill Door** made his cost/benefit calculations based on this phrasing, but my guess would be that it’s quite a bit more than one of every million head injuries that is crippling or fatal. A _million_ smacked heads is an awful lot. ---
**Author:** ![Meyer6](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cc9497/32.png) [@Meyer6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meyer6)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/30 "2010-06-23T04:50:32Z")
> [@TruCelt](#): > > Meanwhile, the Manager comes out and asks me what happened. I tell her. She asked “Was there any blood or anything?” I answer “No” in a slow, stunned tone. Can she seriously be the manager of a swimming pool and not know how dangerous this is? I explain again, and show her the problem at the end of the slide. I tell her she needs at least another 8 inches of mulch to build up the landing spot. She walks away. From this description alone I’m not sure that the Manager deserves the full contempt given to the other people in this story. “Was there any blood or anything” doesn’t necessarily mean “if there wasn’t, no problemo” - it’s just a request for more information. After all, if there was a lot of blood, that would be a legitimate piece of information, wouldn’t it? Unless she did something else stupid, I’m not sure why she was out of line. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/31 "2010-06-23T05:40:23Z")
[From the CDC.](http://www.cdc.gov/ncipc/factsheets/tbi.htm) > [@](#): > > A traumatic brain injury (TBI) is caused by a blow or jolt to the head or a penetrating head injury that disrupts the function of the brain. Not all blows or jolts to the head result in a TBI. The severity of a TBI may range from “mild,” i.e., a brief change in mental status or consciousness to “severe,” i.e., an extended period of unconsciousness or amnesia after the injury. > > Recent data shows that, on average, approximately 1.4 million people sustain a TBI each year in the United States. Of those: > > ``` > * 50,000 die; > * 235,000 are hospitalized; and > * 1.1 million are treated and released from an emergency department.1 > > ``` > > Among children ages 0 to 14 years, TBI results in an estimated > > ``` > * 2,685 deaths; > * 37,000 hospitalizations; and > * 435,000 emergency department visits.1 > > ``` > > The number of people with TBI who are not seen in an emergency department or who receive no care is unknown. Far higher than one in a million. Those people were idiots. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/32 "2010-06-23T15:13:24Z")
> [@Meyer6](#): > > From this description alone I’m not sure that the Manager deserves the full contempt given to the other people in this story. “Was there any blood or anything” doesn’t necessarily mean “if there wasn’t, no problemo” - it’s just a request for more information. After all, if there was a lot of blood, that would be a legitimate piece of information, wouldn’t it? Unless she did something else stupid, I’m not sure why she was out of line. I’m not sure how to convey the tone. It was what we fogey’s would call “Valley-girlish” “Weeeeell, was there any _blood_ or anything?” implied “If not, then what’s the big deal?” ---
**Author:** ![scr4](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/59ef9b/32.png) [@scr4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scr4)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/33 "2010-06-23T15:36:47Z")
It seems Americans are conditioned to be weary of emergency medical care because of the expense, even if you have health insurance. I don’t understand why the same people think universal health care would be a bad idea. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/34 "2010-06-23T15:52:49Z")
> [@scr4](#): > > It seems Americans are conditioned to be weary of emergency medical care because of the expense, even if you have health insurance. I don’t understand why the same people think universal health care would be a bad idea. Most of our insurance plans cover the cost of ER only if you are admitted (i.e. kept over night in the hospital), which almost never happens. You can not be admitted without the permission of their intake officer (usually an RN trained to look for reasons why ER and admissions are unecessary.) It has happened to me twice that the medical personnel spent 30 minutes on the phone trying to convince the inurance company that it really was necessary to admit me. I ended up being sent home. Clearly, I survived, so the insurance company considers their decision justified, I suppose. Almost no plans cover the cost of transportation by ambulance. I still wouldn’t take a risk like that with Celtling. ---
**Author:** ![markm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de053/32.png) [@markm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markm)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/35 "2010-06-23T15:56:58Z")
> [@Freudian Slit](#): > > markm–you mean your parents’ reaction to cuts wasn’t, “Walk it off” Or “Are you bleeding to death? No? You’re fine”? I keed… Heh, nope. It was always, “Suck it up. Hold this on it and when it stops bleeding, I’ll look again and see if it needs to be amputated.” (dad especially loved using the amputation line if it was an above the neck injury) > [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > “I’ll give you something to cry about” or “What did you do that for?” The first was only used if we cried after punishment. It was always, “Oh, that didn’t hurt you. Stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about.” The second wasn’t said, but we got the similar “That wasn’t too smart now, was it?” ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/36 "2010-06-23T18:41:43Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > “I’ll give you something to cry about” or “What did you do that for?” > [@markm](#): > > The first was only used if we cried after punishment. It was always, “Oh, that didn’t hurt you. Stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about.” The second wasn’t said, but we got the similar “That wasn’t too smart now, was it?” In my opinion, the first quote in each case is nothing short of threat of child abuse, and calls for some sort of official investigation. If a parent is in fact beating a child because he/seh is crying, well… ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/37 "2010-06-23T21:07:54Z")
> [@Polycarp](#): > > If a parent is in fact beating a child because he/seh is crying, well… I’m 20 years old and my grandfather _still_ says “I’ll give you something to cry about!” to me. He’s never laid a hand on me. ---
**Author:** ![irishgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@irishgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irishgirl)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/38 "2010-06-23T22:03:53Z")
Dredging from the depths of my memory- a CT brain was MANDATORY for any child with a head injury who came to the ER where I worked if any of the following were present: Seizure Loss of consciousness lasting more than a minute Laceration/contusion \>5cm High impact injury 3 vomits Clinical suspicion of skull fracture Amnesia Any focal neurological deficit (weakness/numbness/slurred speech etc). Most children got 4 hours of observation and some advice, without a CT. This kid needed a proper neuro examination and assessment at the least. **Aspidistra** - for every parent who came to the ER with a child unnecessarily, we usually had one who waited too long. I’ve seen kids with _obviously_ broken (I mean bending in ways limbs aren’t supposed to bend) arms and legs whose parents “thought it was just a sprain” and waited days before coming to an ER…and this is a country where medical care is free. Being a parent is not a substitute for common sense. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/39 "2010-06-23T23:05:36Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > “I’ll give you something to cry about” or “What did you do that for?” “Tell your sister I said not to do that again.” ---
**Author:** ![Meyer6](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cc9497/32.png) [@Meyer6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meyer6)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944/40 "2010-06-24T01:47:25Z")
> [@TruCelt](#): > > I’m not sure how to convey the tone. It was what we fogey’s would call “Valley-girlish” “Weeeeell, was there any _blood_ or anything?” implied “If not, then what’s the big deal?” Hmm, I’ll take your word for it. It just strikes me as not a completely ridiculous question - I can see myself saying that and meaning “Were there any other medical-type things that happened?”, such as … say, seizure, stopped breathing, etc. It could certainly be worded better though. And now I’m sad that ‘valley-girl’ is now considered fogey territory - I would use that expression and I’m only 32! > [@Polycarp](#): > > In my opinion, the first quote in each case is nothing short of threat of child abuse, and calls for some sort of official investigation. If a parent is in fact beating a child because he/seh is crying, well… “I’ll give you something to cry about” doesn’t necessarily imply physical abuse. My own Dad said that and it was usually because I was crying after being sent to my room or after having a privilege revoked (eg., no TV tonight), and he was prepared to extend the punishment if I made a big scene. No beating involved. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/put-that-child-in-the-fucking-ambulance-you-moron/543944.md?page=3)