# Quaint expressions you heard once or twice but use yourself regularly **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 9, 2008, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595 "2008-04-09T13:03:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2008, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/21 "2008-04-09T20:40:01Z")
[QUOTE=GorillaMan] There’s various ones I use when teaching, to substitute for where I normally swear. Something ‘going squiffy’ replaces ‘getting fucked up’… [/QUOTE] That’s used in the British cop comedy _Hot Fuzz_ (as in, “gone a bit squiffy”). I had to look it up to find out what it means! I sometimes say “Spit-spot,” which I first heard in _Mary Poppins_, when I want my boys to do something quickly. “Had your chance - muffed it!”, from _Chitty Chitty Bang Bang_, has its occasional uses. A friend told me the ghetto-slang phrase “That’s how I roll” awhile back, and now I use it every chance I get. The Pythonesque “Not bloody likely” is very useful. Nothing brings a griping, carping, whiny person up short, or silences him/her better, than a brisk “Duly noted.” ---
**Author:** ![picker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/picker/32/13969_2.png) [@picker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picker)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2008, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/22 "2008-04-09T20:45:56Z")
well dip me in sh\*t and roll me in cracker crumbs… ---
**Author:** ![dactylic\_hexameter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d26b3c/32.png) [@dactylic\_hexameter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dactylic_hexameter)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2008, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/23 "2008-04-09T21:12:38Z")
When two people get along really well, I say they get on “like a house on fire.” No one else seem to know what I mean when I say it, so I’m thinking its rare. That being said, I learned it from my mother, who is known for such malapropisms as “Don’t kick a gift horse in the mouth” and “shooting up a creek without a paddle.” (Only, not shooting. I haven’t figured out spoiler windows yet, and I think my posts are doomed to be G-rated for the rest of my life.) ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2008, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/24 "2008-04-09T21:14:19Z")
“Bless your heart,” either directly after, or in place of, heaping insults on someone. ETA: Yes, I picked this up only after moving to the South. ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2008, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/25 "2008-04-09T23:04:51Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir] That’s used in the British cop comedy _Hot Fuzz_ (as in, “gone a bit squiffy”). I had to look it up to find out what it means! [/QUOTE] And what was half-an-hour in when I turned on the TV this evening, just after reading this? Of course I had to watch the whole thing to re-remember how it was used: “The figures have gone a bit..(pause).._squiffy_ since you left.” Perfect example 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Faruiza](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecd19e/32.png) [@Faruiza](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Faruiza)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2008, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/26 "2008-04-09T23:10:01Z")
**Zeldar** , your second one has just permanently inserted itself into my lexicon. I cannot wait to utter that! ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2008, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/27 "2008-04-09T23:14:20Z")
[QUOTE=Faruiza] **Zeldar** , your second one has just permanently inserted itself into my lexicon. I cannot wait to utter that! [/QUOTE] What’s neat is that I can see the scene clearly before my eyes. It was in the 70’s and I went to lunch with a couple of the supervisors on my shift, and when the waitress arrived to take our orders, one of the guys, named Ed, said, “Naw, honey, just bring me a big old group of water.” Priceless. Glad you approve. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2008, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/28 "2008-04-09T23:35:38Z")
[QUOTE=Sarahfeena] “Well shut my mouth and slap your grandma!” [/QUOTE] This is excellent. Alas, I’m not sure I’d be able to keep a straight face if I tried to use it. ---
**Author:** ![GameHat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ed655f/32.png) [@GameHat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GameHat)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/29 "2008-04-10T00:19:43Z")
_Alarm bells are ringing, Willy._ …though I often drop the “Willy”. Said when things haven’t yet gone wrong but people are acting obliviously foolish. Taken from one of my favorite films, _Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels_ Spoilered for a bit of naughty language: [spoiler]WINSTON: What are you carrying, Willy? WILLY: Er, fertilizer. WINSTON: You went out six hours ago to buy a money counter and you come back carrying two bags of fertilizer. Alarm bells are ringing, Willy. WILLY: We need fertilizer, Winston. WINSTON: We also need a fucking money counter, William! We have to get the money out by Thursday and I’ll be buggered if I am counting it… and if you have to get your sodding fertilizer, couldn’t you be a little more subtle? WILLY: What do you mean? WINSTON: I mean we grow copious amounts of ganja, and you don’t look like your average hort-i-fucking-culturalist, that’s what I mean, Willy. [/spoiler] I also get a lot of mileage out of “Chill, Winston!”, but you have to hear the delivery in the film to know how to say it just right ;D ---
**Author:** ![pinkfreud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pinkfreud/32/17603_2.png) [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/30 "2008-04-10T00:44:15Z")
[QUOTE=KneadToKnow] Your grandmother will always remind me of Tom Cullen now. Sorry. [/QUOTE] Hmph. M-O-O-N, that spells **KneadToKnow**. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/31 "2008-04-10T00:52:26Z")
The moment I first heard Dave Letterman say [geshphincto](http://www.unwords.com/unword/geshphincto.html), I was enthralled. (It’s basically a heavy-duty version of _kaput_. Synonyms are _pak chooie_ and _fbxrd,_ around this house anyway.) ---
**Author:** ![Kilvert\_s\_Pagan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c37758/32.png) [@Kilvert\_s\_Pagan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilvert_s_Pagan)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/32 "2008-04-10T01:30:00Z")
I do the **God willin’ and the crik don’t rise** thing myself. Also: [spoiler] “He’s got all his shit in one sock.” “I’ve gotta piss like a racehorse.” “A butt like a brewer’s horse.”[/spoiler] ---
**Author:** ![Faruiza](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecd19e/32.png) [@Faruiza](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Faruiza)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/33 "2008-04-10T03:13:29Z")
[QUOTE=Zeldar] What’s neat is that I can see the scene clearly before my eyes. It was in the 70’s and I went to lunch with a couple of the supervisors on my shift, and when the waitress arrived to take our orders, one of the guys, named Ed, said, “Naw, honey, just bring me a big old group of water.” Priceless. Glad you approve. [/QUOTE] _snort_ Not that one. :smack: I meant the one about breaking out in tiny little assholes. That made me laugh…which is not an easy thing to do today. As for group, I usually say, “a grip” or, “a gang” of whatever. ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/34 "2008-04-10T03:25:26Z")
My favorite mock-curse is “BLessed is the man who loves the Lord.” (Who can find the reference?) The Army is full of neat phrases, many of which have entered common usage: beacoup (From Vietnamese French for “a lot of”) Long pole in the tent (the most important part of something) Elbows and assholes (What you see when a person is running from you) The should not have joined the Army if they can’t take a joke (Said after you shoot someone) Go away (to die) hardball (a paved road) dirtball (a dirt road) and so on … ---
**Author:** ![ToeJam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dfb087/32.png) [@ToeJam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ToeJam)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/35 "2008-04-10T04:24:04Z")
Ever since watching _Tombstone_, I’ve gotten to using the phrase “I’ll be yer Huckleberry…” (It took me a few days to realize just what I was saying though- the Tom Sawyer reference- I just thought it was a really neat way of talking/acting that Val Kilmer was doing). ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/36 "2008-04-10T04:40:26Z")
[QUOTE=RoOsh] Ever since watching _Tombstone_, I’ve gotten to using the phrase “I’ll be yer Huckleberry…” [/QUOTE] What’s it mean? ---
**Author:** ![Crocodiles\_And\_Boulevards](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ee7513/32.png) [@Crocodiles\_And\_Boulevards](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crocodiles_And_Boulevards)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/37 "2008-04-10T06:47:49Z")
When I taste something that’s really bad, I often say: > [@](#): > > That tastes like liquefied ass. ---
**Author:** ![Surok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@Surok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surok)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/38 "2008-04-10T08:09:55Z")
[QUOTE=nevermore] I’m not sure if this one’s widely said, but when a situation is tolerable-to-good, I do love to say “It beats a sharp stick-in-the-eye!” (The hyphens are important here, because the emphasis is on stick, not eye.) Thanks for that one, grandma, [/QUOTE] My grandmother had some similar phrases, although used for situations that were poor-to-tolerable - ‘better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick’ and ‘better than a slap in the face with a wet lettuce/ dead fish’. I’m also fond of ‘ten o’clock and no rabbits caught’ for when I’m not not getting on with, or even started on, a job. There’s also the related (bastardized) ‘fools and bairns shouldn’t see rabbits half-caught’, for when someone is giving advice on what you should do next, and they have either have no idea what they are talking about, or you are cranky because they are actually giving really good advice - you just don’t want to take it. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Them](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/898d66/32.png) [@The\_Them](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Them)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 10:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/39 "2008-04-10T10:16:03Z")
Not sure where it came from - “Cool Beans.” Nobody seems to say it but me, and it ain’t my creation. ---
**Author:** ![Lust4Life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecc23a/32.png) [@Lust4Life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lust4Life)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/40 "2008-04-10T10:34:39Z")
Stolen from Airplane I say "It looks like I picked the wrong week to give up glue sniffing"when I’m in a situation where there are a lot of problems. Unfortunately some people who dont get the reference believe that I am speaking literally. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595.md?page=3)