# Quaint expressions you heard once or twice but use yourself regularly **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 9, 2008, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595 "2008-04-09T13:03:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/61 "2008-04-10T22:45:03Z")
[QUOTE=Shark Sandwich] “Looks like her face caught on fire and someone tried to beat it out with a wet chain.” [/QUOTE] My dad used to say, “She looked like her face had caught fire and somebody beat it out with a golf shoe.” ---
**Author:** ![Carm6773](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/2bfe46/32.png) [@Carm6773](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carm6773)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/62 "2008-04-10T23:41:27Z")
[QUOTE=The Them] Not sure where it came from - “Cool Beans.” Nobody seems to say it but me, and it ain’t my creation. [/QUOTE] I say that too. You ought to see the looks on my 6th Graders faces when I say that. In reference to someone who is a complete stranger: I don’t know him from Adam’s Housecat. In reference to someone who is really really ugly: Fugly or Fell of the Ugly Tree and hit every branch on the way down. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Gadai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@An\_Gadai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Gadai)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2008, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/63 "2008-04-10T23:46:51Z")
[QUOTE=pinkfreud] Hmph. M-O-O-N, that spells **KneadToKnow**. 😛 [/QUOTE] I heard that in _The Stand Miniseries_ when I was a kid and still say it, especially to my friend whose surname is Moen. ---
**Author:** ![E.Thorp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@E.Thorp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E.Thorp)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/64 "2008-04-11T00:11:06Z")
[QUOTE=The Them] Not sure where it came from - “Cool Beans.” Nobody seems to say it but me, and it ain’t my creation. [/QUOTE] It was popular among at least a few college students in the mid-80s, I can report. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/65 "2008-04-11T00:17:55Z")
LBJ had two good zingers, “He doesn’t know chickenshit from chicken salad,” and “He isn’t smart enough to pour piss out of a boot with the instructions printed on the heel.” I’ve always liked, “She looks like she fell out of the Ugly Tree and hit every branch on the way down.” ---
**Author:** ![Brown\_Eyed\_Girl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brown_eyed_girl/32/3574_2.png) [@Brown\_Eyed\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brown_Eyed_Girl)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/66 "2008-04-11T01:02:27Z")
I say cool beans, too. I’m quite fond of saying, “…and Bob’s your uncle!” My husband had never heard that phrase before and I don’t know where I picked it up, but I thought it was so funny I adopted it. Wikipedia even [has an article on the phrase](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bob's_your_uncle). Other than that: “I gotta pee so bad my eyeballs are turning yellow.” I can’t think of the others. ---
**Author:** ![Brown\_Eyed\_Girl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brown_eyed_girl/32/3574_2.png) [@Brown\_Eyed\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brown_Eyed_Girl)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/67 "2008-04-11T01:04:17Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir] LBJ had two good zingers, “He doesn’t know chickenshit from chicken salad,” [/QUOTE] My dad used to say [spoiler]“He don’t know shit from shinola!” “But dad,” says I, “what’s shinola?”[/spoiler] ---
**Author:** ![HongKongFooey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c4cdca/32.png) [@HongKongFooey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HongKongFooey)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/68 "2008-04-11T01:58:46Z")
“Dumb as a sack of hammers” comes in handy too, no idea how common it is or where I first heard it. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/69 "2008-04-11T03:15:33Z")
Around here, you’ll hear that one about 50/50 with “Dumb as a box of hair.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/70 "2008-04-11T03:17:25Z")
Foghorne Leghorne once said of his nemesis the dog, “That boy’s about as sharp as a pound of wet liver.” ---
**Author:** ![ToeJam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dfb087/32.png) [@ToeJam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ToeJam)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/71 "2008-04-11T04:14:18Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir] What’s it mean? [/QUOTE] “I’ll be the Huckleberry [to your Tom Sawyer]” Is how i realized it was trying to be said. Basically, Val uses in the context of saying “I’m game/ I’m up for it.” Val’s character uses the phrase when someone asks for someone to do something. It’s sorta how he volunteers to agree to step up to the task, and I just thought it was a nifty was of expressing that opinion. There’s another word I love to use- “Nifty” But I got that from _Sluggy Freelance_, the webcomics. ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/72 "2008-04-11T04:15:06Z")
I say “on the morrow” fairly often as well. I also have to mentally check myself and say “heaven forbid” because what tries to slip out of my mouth naturally is “heaven forfend” which invariably confuses people. I always assumed I’d gotten it from my mother, who is a lawyer and enjoys using a wider-than-normal range of vocabulary, but when I brought it up to her one time, she said she’d never even heard the phrase before. So how the hell it got to be my default I’ll never know. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/73 "2008-04-11T04:23:51Z")
I tend to use British expressions I’ve picked up from Terry Pratchett. Most commonly used is “Pull the other one. It has bells on.” Followed closely by the observation that things “have gone all pear-shaped.” ---
**Author:** ![missred](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/missred/32/14096_2.png) [@missred](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missred)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/74 "2008-04-11T07:01:30Z")
[QUOTE=Jess] And a gross one I picked up from my dear old dad (I’ve never heard anyone else but him say it): when I’m hungry I say, I’m so hungry I could eat the ass-end out of a dead kitten. [/QUOTE] One of the men that I work with uses “I’m so hungry I could eat the a$$ end out of hard times” frequently (sorry, I don’t have the hang out of spoiler boxes yet). His colorful expressions make for an interesting workplace sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/75 "2008-04-11T13:14:30Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir] **Quartz** , do you think the phrase “Had your chance - muffed it” predates _Chitty Chitty Bang Bang_? [/quote] I’ve no idea. But ‘muffed it’ is a pretty standard euphemism for having failed at something or done something clumsily and thus failed. > [@](#): > > Do most Brits who use it nowadays know its source? Probably not. But that film remains very popular over here. ---
**Author:** ![Labdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/439d5e/32.png) [@Labdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Labdad)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/76 "2008-04-11T14:23:26Z")
One I like that I picked up from Hunter S. Thompson twenty years ago, when referring to a sound thrashing: “He whipped him like a rented mule.” From my father, about a particularly impressive effort: “That was as strong as train smoke.” ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/77 "2008-04-11T14:29:10Z")
[QUOTE=KneadToKnow] My dad used to say, “She looked like her face had caught fire and somebody beat it out with a golf shoe.” [/QUOTE] …Hit in the face with an ugly stick, and the stick broke. ---
**Author:** ![StinkyBurrito](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9e5f3/32.png) [@StinkyBurrito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StinkyBurrito)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/78 "2008-04-11T15:47:37Z")
The ‘butt crack of dawn’. Said when it is _really_ early. ---
**Author:** ![BlinkingDuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eada6e/32.png) [@BlinkingDuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlinkingDuck)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/79 "2008-04-11T16:14:25Z")
busier than a fieldmouse covering up buffalo manure… My mom used an expression I’ve never heard but I like: Don’t be a stick in the mud. ---
**Author:** ![nonacetone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nonacetone/32/2819_2.png) [@nonacetone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nonacetone)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595/80 "2008-04-11T16:32:37Z")
My great aunt always used to say this when we would get heavy rain: It’s raining harder than a double-cunted cow pissin’ on a flatrock I find myself using it now. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quaint-expressions-you-heard-once-or-twice-but-use-yourself-regularly/444595.md?page=5)