# Quality of Sex, a poll for men. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 16, 2007, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386 "2007-09-16T05:59:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2007, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/21 "2007-09-16T19:46:14Z")
I’m gonna say that there’s little if any difference between beautiful and ordinary. In that range, speaking from what experience I have, I agree with **Enfant Terrible** that it’s all in the way we move together. But there _would_ be a big difference, I believe, between ordinary and repulsive. I’ve never bothered to field-test (bed-test?) that theory, but there are certainly women well on the wrong side of ordinary that I’d be hard-pressed to get it up with, no matter how good or enthusiastic they were, or how well their kinks complemented mine. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2007, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/22 "2007-09-16T19:47:55Z")
Yes, it does matter. The more beautiful the woman, the better the sex. Since I got married, the sex has been the best I have ever had. ---
**Author:** ![rayh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@rayh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rayh)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2007, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/23 "2007-09-16T19:50:00Z")
[QUOTE=lobstermobster] yeah i’m whining. trying to be hot is really really hard. (thats what she said) its exhausting [/QUOTE] I’ve never found it that difficult, to be honest. ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2007, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/24 "2007-09-16T22:01:07Z")
[QUOTE=Projammer] **How to Impress a Man** Show up naked. Bring beer. [/QUOTE] At least half of that is completely unnecessary! ---
**Author:** ![Yag\_Rannavach](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/858c86/32.png) [@Yag\_Rannavach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yag_Rannavach)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2007, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/25 "2007-09-16T22:27:25Z")
[QUOTE=Giles] At least half of that is completely unnecessary! [/QUOTE] Yeah, skip the naked part. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2007, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/26 "2007-09-16T23:09:46Z")
[QUOTE=Yag Rannavach] Yeah, skip the naked part. [/QUOTE] ? That’d be a bit problematic wouldn’t it? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2007, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/27 "2007-09-16T23:33:17Z")
It’s not as if I was ever in a position to test this theory, but I strongly suspect the answer is that the attractiveness of my partner has nothing to do with it. Whether or not she looks sexy probably does, but that’s a very different thing. There’s a lot of overlap, but you can be sexy without being attractive, and vice versa. And my partners have always looked sexy. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/28 "2007-09-17T00:14:46Z")
Okay, so far the consensus seems to be that I don’t need to start saving for plastic surgery just yet! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/29 "2007-09-17T00:15:31Z")
Sex happens in the brain so it’s going to be different with each person. I like romance so that is what turns me on. Yes, I have visual preferences but when all is said and done I like the closeness of a partnership. ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/30 "2007-09-17T00:20:39Z")
Looks wouldn’t matter to a blind man; why should looks matter to me? I think the degree of involvement and caring is what makes the difference. Some orgasms are better than others but I’ve never had a bad one. ---
**Author:** ![Staggerlee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/staggerlee/32/3134_2.png) [@Staggerlee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Staggerlee)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/31 "2007-09-17T15:47:40Z")
In my experience it is down to the whole package of Desire going on. Physical attractiveness will come in to it, as may intimacy, love, novelty of the moment, seediness, kinkiness etc. Probably unconscious things like pheremones play their part. But it takes more than just a pretty face and a handy orifice for a mind-blowing orgasm. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/32 "2007-09-17T16:24:53Z")
[QUOTE=CanvasShoes] Men, is the quality of your orgasm enhanced by a woman’s looks if there are no other factors? [/QUOTE] Find me a number of willing women with looks of different degrees and I’ll tell you. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![enigm4tic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@enigm4tic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enigm4tic)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/33 "2007-09-17T17:22:10Z")
Im going to agree with the poster who said “all other things being exactly equal, yes” Another positive factor will have an influence on the enjoyment of sex. All that aside, yeah I’ve also had a great time (sometimes better) with women who weren’t _as_ attractive as some other ones I’ve had. And sex aside, all you women who are going to stop trying to look good; then you won’t get in bed at all. Personally women who don’t try are kind of a turnoff because with just a bit of effort they could look much better and more put together but they don’t bother, and that’s just lazy (of course I take the same suggestion myself and make an effort to look good when I go out) ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/34 "2007-09-17T17:36:20Z")
[QUOTE=CanvasShoes] Is the quality of the orgasm itself (not the leading up to getting excited because she’s so hot part) enhanced because of her beauty over that of the other equally skilled but not as hot (or possibly plain) woman? [/QUOTE] On a long list of factors ‘looks’ are at the bottom. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/35 "2007-09-17T17:49:38Z")
Well, for me, a big part of the experience is what the girl actually feels like. In other words, I tend not to like heavier girls and I don’t like to feel a lot of excess rolls when I’m working my magic. So in other words, what her face looks like is less of a concern to me. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/36 "2007-09-17T20:03:30Z")
It’s not like you can see much of her during the act anyway. So no, looks aren’t as much of a factor once you’re in the act. But they can be a big factor for getting to the act. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/37 "2007-09-17T20:11:43Z")
[QUOTE=lobstermobster] but if it doesn’t matter whyyyy do i have to bottthherrrrr. [/QUOTE] Are you saying the only reason you try to look good is to increase the quality of your sexual partner’s orgasms? ---
**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/38 "2007-09-17T20:32:13Z")
While I don’t have enough data to form a scientific conclusion, I do have anecdotal experience which, of course, is only applicable to one subject - me. I would say that other factors being fairly equal (can never be totally equal, of course), it doesn’t affect the orgasm/overall experience for the first round. _However_, I have found the turnaround time for repeat performances lowered by an attractive partner, given a similar levels of effort by the women. I will also posit that, again other factors being fairly equal, that I was more proactive when in a relationship with an attractive partner than with a plain/simply OK partner. That said, I’ve been with plain partners who were really into it and knew what they were doing, and attractive partners who were the opposite, and in those cases the enthusiasm and skill were the bigger factors. (Please note, my experiments are at least decade and a half old, and my data retrieval system is flawed even under the best of circumstances) ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/39 "2007-09-17T20:53:50Z")
Passion trumps attractiveness any day of the week. Some of the best pre-marriage sex I’ve had is with partners who were fairly homely and wouldn’t turn heads, but knew what they (and I) liked and loved to do it. And on the few occasions that I was lucky enough to make it with women way above my own level of attractiveness, the entire act was unmemorable and not particularly noteworthy. So in my experience, the quality of the orgasm is more a function of the skill and enthusiasm, rather than the beauty, of the person that got me there. ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2007, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386/40 "2007-09-17T20:53:52Z")
The problem is that, as has been said already, the looks part is subjective. Odds are that if someone who shows up, and actually wants to have sex with you, you’re precisely hot enough. That said, and if you _could_ quantify it with numbers, it’d go something like this (on a 1-10 scale). Average looking girl, low to average skills: 4 Average looking girl, above average skills: 8 Insanely hot girl, low to average skills: 5 Insanely hot girl, above average skills: 9 Ugly girl, low to average skills: 2 Ugly girl, above average skills: 5 In any of the above scenarios though (of which I’ve done all teh above), sex is involved, ergo; even though it might be bad sex, it’s still sex, which = good. This of course doesn’t take into account emotion at ALL, cause that would _totally_ skew the data. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quality-of-sex-a-poll-for-men/419386.md?page=3)