Exactly.
That’s the crux of my OP. Stranger said: “Perhaps you should learn some basic courtesy.” I’m not pretending that isn’t personal, I’m asking if it breaks the rules or is considered an “attack”. I don’t believe it does… or is. Courtesy being one of the things we strive for around here.
We strive for truth, but if I said, “Perhaps you should learn to tell the truth,” that’s pretty clearly calling someone a liar.
I am trying to think of a situation where someone wouldn’t take that as an insult and not an impartial observation in real life…and I just can’t.
The number one rule is, “Don’t be a jerk”. Truth is the background. How we arrive at that is through courteous discourse.
Different thing altogether. Calling someone a liar is established as being against the rules.
I can. Regardless, just because someone takes offense, doesn’t mean it it’s against the rules. These forums are full of people taking offense to remarks directed at them that are comfortably within posting guidelines.
It helps to realize what forum you are posting in, as well as the particular rules for that forum.
Of course it is. It’s calling the other person rude.
I’m not sure I agree.
After being actually attacked, Stranger replied, “Perhaps you should learn some basic courtesy.” I don’t see that rising to the level of attack. Of course I could be wrong, I’m not a mod after all. That’s just my opinion.
And at this point, the most a mod has said to this point specifically is, “Both made it personal. That leads to issues. We try to head these exchanges off.”
Which I get, and have no issue with, but did stop short of saying that reminding an attacker they are being uncourteous is against board rules (compared to, say, reminding someone they are being untruthful - which is).
Well, maybe a mod could say what they think, but in my book, yes, there is a difference between “I feel that was impolite” and “you should learn some basic courtesy”. The first implies a slip-up, the second that your interlocutor lacks all basic courtesy. A personal attack. Which is against board rules.
The first would be like to saying “I think you’ve made a factual error there” and the second “you’re a liar”.
Irrelevant.
Being attacked doesn’t give a poster any special privileges as to their response, sure, but it does change the optics of the interchange as a whole. That was my point.
I’ve already said as much previously. The issue here was wether the response was or wasn’t personal in a way that breaks rules. I’m saying it was.
I was not the mod in this interaction, but i agree with both the moderation and @MrDibble’s analysis of it. I would likely have done much the same if this interaction took place in one of my forums.