# Question about Jewish cemeteries

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-jewish-cemeteries/90904>\
**Category:** Factual Questions\
**Created:** [November 1, 2001, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-jewish-cemeteries/90904 "2001-11-01T14:22:25Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-jewish-cemeteries/90904/1 "2001-11-01T14:22:25Z")

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Before I start, I’d like to point out that, yes, I am Jewish. I do this too, and I’ve never understood why.

A co-worker was watching _Schindler’s List_ the other night and saw a scene in which someone visited a Jewish gravesite. The person put rocks on the tombstone.

So the question is, why do we do this?

Robin

[fixed coding]

[Edited by bibliophage on 11-01-2001 at 08:53 AM]

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**Author:** ![leroy\_the\_mule](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6a8cbe/32.png) [@leroy\_the\_mule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leroy_the_mule)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-jewish-cemeteries/90904/2 "2001-11-01T14:34:13Z")

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my grandfather said this was to let the family know that someone had visited the grave. Sort of like leaving a calling card. I wonder if it isn’t more a gesture of finality, a symbolic burial in which you acknowledge the person’s death.

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**Author:** ![Keeve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f07891/32.png) [@Keeve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Keeve)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-jewish-cemeteries/90904/3 "2001-11-01T15:06:06Z")

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Leroy’s right, but knowing the origin of the custom will give it more meaning.

Namely, prior to the development of engraved gravestones (hey, i wonder if those words are related?), graves were marked merely with a high pile of stones and rocks to ensure that people would not walk on them. Due to wind and other natural causes, this pile would get lower and smaller over the years. That is why visitors would add a few rocks to build the pile back up.

After tombstones and grave markers became customary, this was no longer needed. But among Jews, it is very common to continue a custom even when the original reason for it no longer applies. This is because the _apparent_ original reason is not necessarily the only _valid_ reason, and this case is a good example, where the “calling card” idea is an alternate reason which keeps the tradition going.

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**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-jewish-cemeteries/90904/4 "2001-11-01T17:39:00Z")

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Also, Jews don’t tend to leave flowers and stuff at gravesites. This is a way for them to leave something.

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**Author:** ![Cargogal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/48db29/32.png) [@Cargogal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cargogal)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-jewish-cemeteries/90904/5 "2001-11-01T18:18:53Z")

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Does this have any relation to cairns?