# Question about language restriction in The BBQ Pit **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [January 13, 2012, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435 "2012-01-13T21:32:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2012, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/1 "2012-01-13T21:32:43Z")
Why is it okay to call someone a dick (or prick or cock) in the Pit, but not okay to call someone a cunt? ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2012, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/2 "2012-01-13T21:35:29Z")
Because Ed didn’t get a bug up his ass about them. (And I suspect that bug is named chivalry and stems from a desire to protect the dainty womenfolk. The fainting couch can only take so much flopping, you know.) ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2012, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/3 "2012-01-13T21:43:21Z")
Isn’t calling someone an asshole also against the rules (though mostly tolerated)? ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2012, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/4 "2012-01-13T21:47:40Z")
No. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2012, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/5 "2012-01-13T22:43:29Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > Why is it okay to call someone a dick (or prick or cock) in the Pit, but not okay to call someone a cunt? If it makes you feel better, you can tell someone to suck your pussy/snatch/hoohaw, but not to suck your dick/cock/Rod of Manhood +1. So that restores the gender imbalance somewhat. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2012, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/6 "2012-01-13T23:01:19Z")
> [@Bob Ducca](#): > > Isn’t calling someone an asshole also against the rules (though mostly tolerated)? No, not in the Pit. It’s very much against the rules in any other forum. As to the OP, it’s a quirk of language, or culture, or human nature, or I don’t-know-what, but insults aren’t symmetrical. “Dick” isn’t considered as bad as “cunt,” “breeder” isn’t as bad as “faggot,” “honkie” isn’t as bad as “nigger.” Why this is so, and what (if anything) should be done about it, is probably outside the scope of an ATMB thread, but its a simple fact that society does not view these insults as equal. Ed feels that there’s a threshold of offensiveness that he doesn’t want to see on his board, and he puts “cunt” on one side, and dick on the other. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 7:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/7 "2012-01-14T07:48:50Z")
Okey-doke. Arbitrary but with an explanation. That’s cool. I mean, it does seem silly to me (as do all the other language restrictions in the Pit), but I was also curious about what seems to be a strange, vaguely sexist restriction. Thanks for the explanation. ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 7:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/8 "2012-01-14T07:52:07Z")
It’s okay to call me a cunt. You just better have the dick to back it up. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 8:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/9 "2012-01-14T08:07:06Z")
I get it, I think most people intuitively understand _cunt_ to be a much more degrading, insulting word than _dick_. I find unawareness of this distinction to be a bit unlikely. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 8:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/10 "2012-01-14T08:22:08Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > I get it, I think most people intuitively understand _cunt_ to be a much more degrading, insulting word than _dick_. I find unawareness of this distinction to be a bit unlikely. I think most people are aware of it, they simply disagree with the idea. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 8:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/11 "2012-01-14T08:31:51Z")
… ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 8:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/12 "2012-01-14T08:34:53Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > I think most people are aware of it, they simply disagree with the idea. ? Either you misread my post or you misspoke. 😕 I’ll leave the answer up to you. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 8:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/13 "2012-01-14T08:56:15Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > I get it, I think most people intuitively understand _cunt_ to be a much more degrading, insulting word than _dick_. I find unawareness of this distinction to be a bit unlikely. Assume this hypothetical: that there is someone reading this who does not “intuitively understand” it; explain why “cunt” is much more degrading and insulting than “dick”. ETA: Mods, if this is straying too far from the avowed purpose of ATMB, please let me know and we can continue the discussion elsewhere. ---
**Author:** ![aldiboronti](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc348/32.png) [@aldiboronti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aldiboronti)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 9:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/14 "2012-01-14T09:52:34Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > Assume this hypothetical: that there is someone reading this who does not “intuitively understand” it; explain why “cunt” is much more degrading and insulting than “dick”. > > ETA: Mods, if this is straying too far from the avowed purpose of ATMB, please let me know and we can continue the discussion elsewhere. I suspect that the only people who would not ‘intuitively understand this’ would be those whose native language is not English. I’m sure that I would find myself puzzling over the relative force of words in other languages than my own. ---
**Author:** ![What\_the](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f4b2a3/32.png) [@What\_the](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_the)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 10:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/15 "2012-01-14T10:57:44Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > Why is it okay to call someone a dick (or prick or cock) in the Pit, but not okay to call someone a cunt? Is it ok to use the word “cunt” to refer to a body part? The ladies don’t care for that so much either. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/16 "2012-01-14T13:28:18Z")
> [@aldiboronti](#): > > I suspect that the only people who would not ‘intuitively understand this’ would be those whose native language is not English. I’m sure that I would find myself puzzling over the relative force of words in other languages than my own. My native language is English, and I don’t “intuitively understand” it. ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/17 "2012-01-14T14:18:05Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > My native language is English, and I don’t “intuitively understand” it. “People generally find it more offensive” IS the explanation. It’s not like words have objective or inherent meaning beyond what we as a culture assign to them. “Cunt” is considered one of the more offensive words in American English, considerably more offensive than “dick”. Why? Because people generally consider it so. Is this a genuinely difficult concept? Also, I find it hard to believe that anyone grew up in this country without realizing that “cunt” is a stronger word than “dick”. I mean, really, sell us another one. (In British English-speaking areas, the relative offensiveness is quite different, but Ed is American, so here we are.) ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/18 "2012-01-14T14:22:52Z")
You know, it’s funny but I always did think “cunt” was more offensive than “dick” until we started having all these discussions about it here on the Dope, and I appear to have become sensitized to the word. So maybe the reason has to do with how often the word is heard in a non-insulting context. In other words hearing people say “cunt” over and over without telling me I am an “f’ing cunt” has robbed the word of some of its magic power. The logical conclusion to this would seem to be making all words legal, but something tells me that’s not going to happen. It’s interesting, though. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/19 "2012-01-14T14:57:16Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > ? Either you misread my post or you misspoke. 😕 I’ll leave the answer up to you. What she means is that we are all aware of the cultural baggage the word has. But I’m not the culture, and I find it no more or less insulting than any other naughty word. (I get offended by intent, really. If someone calls me a dick because they want to hurt me, I’d be more offended than someone who called me a cunt in a jocular way.) ---
**Author:** ![TubaDiva](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tubadiva/32/507_2.png) [@TubaDiva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TubaDiva)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2012, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435/20 "2012-01-14T17:28:22Z")
“Dick” has some connotations that are not always so negative and can even be funny or playful sometimes. For example, I know some guys in a band called “The Five Dicks.” At least four of them are Richard. 🙂 There’s a whole lot of dick jokes out there. There are few cunt jokes. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-about-language-restriction-in-the-bbq-pit/609435.md?page=2)