# Question and Answer thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 14, 2003, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722 "2003-04-14T20:17:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 14
**Author:** ![Aankh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@Aankh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aankh)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/261 "2003-04-24T14:54:22Z")
Q: What did the guy say after sex on a hot, muggy day? A: A vodka martini with 3 olives. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/262 "2003-04-24T15:26:05Z")
Q: What does James Bond drink after a night of kinky sex? A: Only when it’s raining. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/263 "2003-04-24T15:38:24Z")
Q: Do I make you wet? A: You cold try crossing you legs. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/264 "2003-04-24T15:39:32Z")
What the… A: You could try crossing your legs. ---
**Author:** ![roadrunner70](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e19b73/32.png) [@roadrunner70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/roadrunner70)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/265 "2003-04-24T15:44:37Z")
Q. How can I keep these flies away from me? A. The bird is the word. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/266 "2003-04-24T15:45:14Z")
Q: I’d like to take up Zen, but I can’t sit in Lotus? What position should I use for Christian meditation? [size=1](Yeah, it was reaching a bit!) A: “The voice of the turtle is heard in the land.” ---
**Author:** ![Bruce\_Daddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@Bruce\_Daddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bruce_Daddy)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/267 "2003-04-24T16:40:46Z")
Q: Honey, what did the crazy man say to you before he opened his coat? A: That was 3 hours ago! ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/268 "2003-04-24T17:15:19Z")
Q: “Why are you complaining about the nipple clamps, I only just put them on you?” A: Tapioca pudding is a good alternative. ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_of\_Sandwhich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/91b2a8/32.png) [@Earl\_of\_Sandwhich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_of_Sandwhich)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/269 "2003-04-24T17:32:51Z")
Q. I can’t afford to buy her a diamond. What will I do? A. Because I smell. ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/270 "2003-04-24T18:21:26Z")
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 1215 ---
**Author:** ![Bruce\_Daddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@Bruce\_Daddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bruce_Daddy)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/271 "2003-04-24T18:37:15Z")
Q: Dude. What time was it 4 hours and 5 minutes ago? I have trouble remebering stuff. A: Don and Mike. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/272 "2003-04-24T20:18:57Z")
Q: OK **Bruce** what do you call your testicles? A: In Sweden they call it ‘Finth lumthern’. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/273 "2003-04-24T20:31:48Z")
Q: You have more than one name for your penis? A: Doh! ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/274 "2003-04-24T20:56:17Z")
Q: Do you want to see my Finth lumthern? A: Fortunately just some skinned knees. ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_of\_Sandwhich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/91b2a8/32.png) [@Earl\_of\_Sandwhich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_of_Sandwhich)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/275 "2003-04-24T21:12:45Z")
Q. What’s the special at that New Guinean restaurant? A. Because I never learned to walk. ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/276 "2003-04-24T21:28:02Z")
Q: Why is that New Guinean gnawing on your knees? A: a snapshot in a photo album. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/277 "2003-04-24T22:24:49Z")
Q: So it is blackmail **verbenabeast** what proof do you have about my Goat Feltching exploits? A: It was the straw that broke the cammels back. ---
**Author:** ![Aankh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@Aankh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aankh)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/278 "2003-04-24T23:24:08Z")
Q: Why is a straw a lousy cigarette holder? A: On the island of Dr.Moreau. ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/279 "2003-04-25T01:20:46Z")
Q: Romeo, Romeo… Wherefore art thou, Romeo? A: Moebius Strip ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/280 "2003-04-25T03:37:16Z")
Q. What was the National Enquirer headline when Dr. Moebius was arrested for indecent exposure? A. The hamsters wouldn’t like it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722.md?page=13) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722.md?page=15)