# Question and Answer thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 14, 2003, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722 "2003-04-14T20:17:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 15
**Author:** ![brianjedi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@brianjedi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brianjedi)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/281 "2003-04-25T04:03:35Z")
Q: Why can’t we search for fewer than three characters? A: Spider-Man and Bart Simpson. ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/282 "2003-04-25T04:12:10Z")
Q: Who should I not seat at the same table at my wedding reception? A: I can’t stand the smell of melted cheese. ---
**Author:** ![brianjedi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@brianjedi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brianjedi)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/283 "2003-04-25T04:20:21Z")
Q: What’s with your blatant anti-nacho bias? A: I can’t believe you wore _that_ shirt. ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/284 "2003-04-25T04:23:46Z")
Q: Do you like my Spongebob Squarepants soccer jersey? A: You can never trust someone who owns a poodle. ---
**Author:** ![brianjedi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@brianjedi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brianjedi)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/285 "2003-04-25T04:39:30Z")
Q: What’s with your blatant anti-French bias? A: Rule 8.01© says it’s illegal. ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/286 "2003-04-25T04:45:03Z")
Q: Why can’t I use a Longerberger basket for sexual purposes? A: Half a mile from O’Fallon, past the water tower. ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/287 "2003-04-25T17:55:19Z")
Q: I seem to have lost my virginity… Where was it last? A: a shoe ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/288 "2003-04-25T18:31:32Z")
Q: What’s fit to be tied? A: That’s what’s known as squatter’s rights. ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/289 "2003-04-25T18:35:27Z")
Q: What is your favorite euphemism for defecating? A: warm, fluffy, towels. ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/290 "2003-04-25T18:40:01Z")
Q: Is there anything to eat in this house? A: Visa and Mastercard welcome ---
**Author:** ![Bruce\_Daddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@Bruce\_Daddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bruce_Daddy)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/291 "2003-04-25T18:56:14Z")
Q: What do Bruce’s friday night dates say? A: Under the coffee table. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/292 "2003-04-25T19:03:39Z")
Q: What’s the oddest place you’ve had kinky sex? A: It’s a “come as you are” party. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/293 "2003-04-25T19:30:53Z")
Q: What’d your mom say when she caught you masturbating? A: That would be the 11th Commandment. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/294 "2003-04-25T20:24:01Z")
Q: Where did I hear the phraise “Though shalt not eat hot dog buns on a Friday”? A: Hairy the fairy and Hump the nymph. ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/295 "2003-04-25T20:34:54Z")
Q: What are your plans for this weekend? A: Angus Young ---
**Author:** ![Zenham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a5b964/32.png) [@Zenham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenham)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/296 "2003-04-25T21:23:29Z")
Q. Why did Angus get in trouble for drinking beer? A. A wedge of Caerphilly ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/297 "2003-04-25T21:41:52Z")
Q: Can you describe the discharge? A: Big Cooshy Slippers ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/298 "2003-04-25T22:37:58Z")
Q: What should I avoid wearing at a Metallica concert? A: Smoked salmon, cream cheese, and a brick. ---
**Author:** ![Aankh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@Aankh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aankh)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/299 "2003-04-25T23:35:29Z")
Q: What do upper class hooligans fling at windows? A: She didn’t know what to touch. ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2003, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/300 "2003-04-26T00:48:58Z")
Q: Why did Helen Keller have a nervous breakdown at the nudist colony? A: Lakeside Park [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722.md?page=14) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722.md?page=16)