# Question and Answer thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 14, 2003, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722 "2003-04-14T20:17:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 21
**Author:** ![Zenham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a5b964/32.png) [@Zenham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenham)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/401 "2003-05-01T01:19:10Z")
Q. Name four people who are glad you scalded yourself with hot coffee. A. Seven hours and three marmosets later ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/402 "2003-05-01T02:49:05Z")
Q: At what point di you think “I’ll try a gerbil”? A: texas hold’em ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/403 "2003-05-01T05:06:07Z")
Q: What’s the next step after “Missouri Show Me” in seduction? A: Everything but anchovies ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/404 "2003-05-01T06:39:41Z")
Q: What Iron Chef theme ingredients would you like me to cover you with? A: Carol Channing and a bottle of Windex. ---
**Author:** ![rhodyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/91b2a8/32.png) [@rhodyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhodyne)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 7:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/405 "2003-05-01T07:12:14Z")
Q: Name two things that don’t go down too good. A: Like ferrets on acid. ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 7:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/406 "2003-05-01T07:34:06Z")
Q: How did my two brothers fight when we were growing up? A: The fan won’t fit in the window. Side note: The answer to the Carol Channing and Windex question was damn funny. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/407 "2003-05-01T14:52:41Z")
Q:“Did you hear about the leper who after he slept with a prostitute told her she could keep the tip,… anyway why is there a fan in the door?” A: It reminds me of my prom night. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/408 "2003-05-01T14:56:36Z")
Q: What answer did the Jewish father give when his son asked “Why is this night different from all other nights?”? A: Because the goat was drinking straight rum. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/409 "2003-05-01T16:07:26Z")
Q: Why is your bedroom so messy? A: The Opti-Grab and a drink umbrella. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/410 "2003-05-01T16:22:24Z")
Q: What are two things that can make you go cross-eyed? A: That’s just, like, your _opinion_, man. ---
**Author:** ![hocow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hocow/32/4112_2.png) [@hocow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hocow)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/411 "2003-05-01T17:09:24Z")
Q: Isn’t marijuana illegal in this country? A: The games that vampires play. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/412 "2003-05-01T18:23:19Z")
Q: What do you suck at? A: Phenut buuuttr hon de rhoof huv mah moufe. ---
**Author:** ![Zenham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a5b964/32.png) [@Zenham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenham)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/413 "2003-05-01T18:40:45Z")
Q. Why can’t you talk after giving Peter Pan a blowjob? A. PC LOAD LETTER ---
**Author:** ![brianjedi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@brianjedi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brianjedi)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/414 "2003-05-01T19:27:20Z")
Q: What the f\*ck does this mean? A: 2 soft-shell tacos, Mexican rice and a large drink. ---
**Author:** ![Sidewinder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/53a042/32.png) [@Sidewinder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sidewinder)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/415 "2003-05-01T19:46:08Z")
Q: What did the soft-shell crab have for dinner? A: Stuck in my zipper! ---
**Author:** ![Zenham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a5b964/32.png) [@Zenham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenham)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/416 "2003-05-01T19:49:45Z")
Q. Where do you want these lemmings, sir? A. In a gadda da vida, baby. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/417 "2003-05-01T20:06:02Z")
Q: Where do you keep yout iron butterflies? A: Wham, bam, thankyou mam. ---
**Author:** ![Zenham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a5b964/32.png) [@Zenham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenham)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/418 "2003-05-01T20:38:05Z")
Q. What’s the proper way to discipline Barney and Betty’s son? And would you like a mint? A. Surplus Inventory ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_John\_of\_Babylon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7c8e57/32.png) [@Dr\_John\_of\_Babylon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_John_of_Babylon)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/419 "2003-05-01T20:52:01Z")
Q. Which knight has the silliest name? A. Bob Dylan’s 115th Dream ---
**Author:** ![Sidewinder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/53a042/32.png) [@Sidewinder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sidewinder)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2003, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/420 "2003-05-01T20:52:25Z")
Q: Where did you find those pasties you’re wearing? A: Smegma. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722.md?page=20) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722.md?page=22)