# Question and Answer thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 14, 2003, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722 "2003-04-14T20:17:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 26
**Author:** ![hocow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hocow/32/4112_2.png) [@hocow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hocow)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/501 "2003-05-06T12:50:51Z")
Q: So did you sleep with your new girlfriend yet? A: Internet made easy. ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/502 "2003-05-06T13:46:02Z")
Q: What would the Internet be without pop-up ads? A: Not knowing who they are doesn’t make them not interesting. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/503 "2003-05-06T14:44:40Z")
Q: **KCSuze** why don’t your ‘wonder twins’ have names? A: Two Slim Jims and a bottle of coke. ---
**Author:** ![Liz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/liz/32/17737_2.png) [@Liz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liz)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/504 "2003-05-06T14:45:42Z")
Q: What do you call a bachelor’s breakfast? A: There’s only two ways to do it: face down and face up. ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/505 "2003-05-06T23:22:18Z")
Q: How can you rebuilt the “Old Man of the Mountains”? A: Some tomato sauce and a glass of port ought to do the trick. ---
**Author:** ![Eman\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/eb9ed0/32.png) [@Eman\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eman_Bruin)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/506 "2003-05-06T23:48:20Z")
Q: According to Dr. Lecter, what ELSE goes good with liver? A: Goobers ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/507 "2003-05-07T00:02:51Z")
Q: Mr. Lecter… what is your least favorite snack? A: lower than whale poop ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/508 "2003-05-07T00:14:06Z")
Q: How low would the Bush Administration have to go to be beaten in the 2004 elections by **Polycarp**? A: “Are we there yet?” ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/509 "2003-05-07T01:20:07Z")
Q: What is your vote for **Polycarp for Prez** ’s campaign slogan, 'Beast? A: A chicken in every pot ---
**Author:** ![knock\_knock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/22d042/32.png) [@knock\_knock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knock_knock)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/510 "2003-05-07T01:47:31Z")
Q: What is _your_ vote for **Polycarp for Prez** ’s campaign slogan, 'Beast? A: It doesn’t taste as bad as you’d expect, although the texture is a bit peculiar. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/511 "2003-05-07T02:16:52Z")
Q: What was the answer Monica Lewinsky gave to the question the networks bleeped out? A: Hannibal Hamlin never played Charlie Brown! ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_of\_Sandwhich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/91b2a8/32.png) [@Earl\_of\_Sandwhich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_of_Sandwhich)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/512 "2003-05-07T02:58:08Z")
Q. Why did John Wilkes Booth’s plays sell more tickets than Hannibal Hamlin’s speeches? A. Because he likes his moustache that way. ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/513 "2003-05-07T03:27:31Z")
Q: So, why is Adolf’s mustache a direct rip-off of Charlie Chaplin’s? A: Rum, bum, and concertina. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/514 "2003-05-07T04:22:10Z")
Q: What are the three main attractions of the Bottomless Mexican Cantina? A: _Ornithorhynchus anatinus_ ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/515 "2003-05-07T04:26:21Z")
Q: What’s a fancy-shmancy way of saying “Duckbilled Platypus?” A: I could never shave my head. ---
**Author:** ![hocow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hocow/32/4112_2.png) [@hocow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hocow)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/516 "2003-05-07T04:30:00Z")
Q: Why don’t you be Michael Jordan for Halloween? A: You don’t want to lose it again. ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/517 "2003-05-07T05:06:43Z")
Q: Why shouldn’t I join the club for born-again virgins? A: The marmalade tasted better. ---
**Author:** ![knock\_knock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/22d042/32.png) [@knock\_knock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knock_knock)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/518 "2003-05-07T05:16:42Z")
Q: Why didn’t you eat your toast? A: The face was already squished. ---
**Author:** ![Zenham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a5b964/32.png) [@Zenham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenham)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/519 "2003-05-07T05:17:30Z")
Q. Why didn’t you vote for Bush A. Why do we always answer questions with other questions? ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2003, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/520 "2003-05-07T05:27:45Z")
Q: What makes you think I’m avoiding the question? A: The last ever taping of “Wheel of Fortune.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722.md?page=25) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722.md?page=27)