# Question and Answer thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 14, 2003, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722 "2003-04-14T20:17:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 51
**Author:** ![Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ea5d25/32.png) [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2003, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1001 "2003-09-07T18:06:11Z")
Q: What is that annoying two-note pattern in the background? A: Caps lock key. ---
**Author:** ![Standup\_Karmic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Standup\_Karmic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Standup_Karmic)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2003, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1002 "2003-09-07T18:19:54Z")
q: how do you guys get those bigger letters into the sentences you type? a: no guarantees, but I suspect it’s a titmouse. ---
**Author:** ![Homer\_J](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c37758/32.png) [@Homer\_J](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homer_J)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2003, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1003 "2003-09-07T19:14:14Z")
Q: Egads sir, what evil animal-bird hybrid have you created this time? A: Beans on Toast ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2003, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1004 "2003-09-07T19:55:40Z")
Q: What is the Rootin’ Tootin’ breakfast special? A: It appears that the badger has gone to Victoria’s Secret. ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1005 "2003-09-08T02:06:52Z")
Q: What’s so special about this version of “Wind in the Willows”? A: Everybody mambo! ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1006 "2003-09-08T02:13:21Z")
Q: What other market did Penthouse is in its plummet towards bankpuptcy? A: Kittens. ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1007 "2003-09-08T04:50:11Z")
Q: What’s for dinner, honey? A: Differential Calculus ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Babbington](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Mr.Babbington](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Babbington)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1008 "2003-09-08T04:53:26Z")
Q. What’s Your SDMB user name, Sir Issac Newton? A. Llanfairpwyllgwyngergerochwyrndrobwyllllantisilliogogogoch. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1009 "2003-09-08T04:59:51Z")
Q: What is the correct incantation for summoning Cthulhu’s younger brother, Ted? A: Close to a buck a gig these days… ---
**Author:** ![Standup\_Karmic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Standup\_Karmic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Standup_Karmic)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1010 "2003-09-08T05:00:42Z")
Q: Hey, can you tell me the Australian word for “cracker”? A: My bottle of water. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ea5d25/32.png) [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1011 "2003-09-08T12:19:50Z")
Q: Ooops, I was supposed to tell you that Sunspace needed an alternate toilet. What was it he used again? A: The Symbionese Liberation Army. ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1012 "2003-09-08T14:40:32Z")
Q: I remember you, you’re John Smith from high school – I heard you changed your legal name. What did you change it to? A: A lame duck ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1013 "2003-09-08T17:39:38Z")
Q: What is the politically incorrect term for a physically challenged waterfowl? A: Add a dash of Angoustora bitters and shake. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1014 "2003-09-08T18:35:58Z")
Q: How do you make a San Andreas Fault? A: ‘On Mouseover’. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ea5d25/32.png) [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1015 "2003-09-08T19:36:16Z")
Q: What’s on page 541 of Mickey’s Kama Sutra? A: I’m not sure if that’s blood or ketchup. ---
**Author:** ![hocow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hocow/32/4112_2.png) [@hocow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hocow)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1016 "2003-09-08T21:00:59Z")
Q: Why does your Grandma’s meatloaf taste so weird? A: American Legion Post 279 ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1017 "2003-09-08T21:25:23Z")
Q: Who beat the Steelers on Sunday? A: Two grizzly bears and a penguin. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1018 "2003-09-08T21:56:13Z")
Q: What walked into a bar and sat down next to the Rabbi? A: I’m not sure, but it seems to be exuding fluorescent slime that smells of formic acid. ---
**Author:** ![Aholibah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Aholibah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aholibah)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1019 "2003-09-08T22:43:52Z")
Q: Why is this pie so shiny? A: Mel Gibson’s _Passion_. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2003, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722/1020 "2003-09-08T23:10:27Z")
Q: What is Kevin Costner’s butt? A: Squinty-eyed devil [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722.md?page=50) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-and-answer-thread/168722.md?page=52)