# Question for gay, male dopers (mainly) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 3, 2005, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701 "2005-03-03T04:01:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/41 "2005-03-13T19:11:08Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > Just like torturing other humans, the more you see it the more accepting and less repulsed one becomes. It just may be that acceptance of gay sex is the conditioned response. Yeah right, because gay sex and torture are the same thing. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/42 "2005-03-13T19:15:55Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > Yeah right, because gay sex and torture are the same thing. Hmm. I thought it was just me… Thanks! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/43 "2005-03-13T19:47:18Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > I don’t really find the idea of going to bed with a woman gross… just not boner-making. Though I will have to express reservations at the idea of cunnilingus. > > Here’s a question for any straight guys who may have wandered in: Do you find the idea of topping (being the insertive partner in anal sex, receiving a blow job) to be less gross than bottoming (receiving anal sex, giving a blow job)? Straight guy checking in. Man on man sex does not repulse me, but it does not attract me. Topping I could handle, but more out of curiosity rather than attraction. I would not want to bottom, but that’s more out of nervousness about anything large being shoved up my butt. For me the main thing is that emotional attraction is necessary before sexual attraction grows to the point that I might want to have sex, and I just don’t happen to have that sort of feeling for fellows. I have close friends of both sexes, but I only develop the requisite emotional attachment to females. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/44 "2005-03-13T19:50:40Z")
> [@chaoticdonkey](#): > > . . . observations of my floormates here in the dorms. That pretty much says it all. A group of young males trying to assert their manhood. Take what you observe of them with a grain of salt. ---
**Author:** ![EllisDee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellisdee/32/4531_2.png) [@EllisDee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EllisDee)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/45 "2005-03-14T02:00:23Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > Not all men enjoy all aspects of porn, and I would assume that many don’t enjoy seeing the ‘money shot’. I would suspect that those people who do want the money shot be less repulsed by gay sex, cum, and porn I do not fit your suspicion. ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/46 "2005-03-14T02:37:06Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > Just out of interest **Otto** (or anyone else), is the money shot a standard feature of gay porn as well? Yes, and maybe even more so than in straight porn, although I don’t ever watch straight porn. But in gay porn, you have two guys to do it, and since they almost always use condoms, at least in the newer stuff, they’ve got to put it somewhere, now, don’t they? 😉 Then again, it’s been at least 6 years since I’ve watch straight porn, and even then I didn’t watch videos. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/47 "2005-03-14T02:40:48Z")
> [@Ellis Dee](#): > > Sorry for the extra “the”. I edited that sentence several times, and left it hanging. :eek: 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/48 "2005-03-14T03:43:58Z")
> [@chaoticdonkey](#): > > But in gay porn, you have two guys to do it. Only two? Maybe in the porn _you_ watch. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/49 "2005-03-14T14:02:53Z")
> [@](#): > > Yeah right, because gay sex and torture are the same thing. I used torture to show the extent to which a human can become conditioned. If humans can become conditioned to this truly inhumaine act they certainally should be able to become accustomed to this other non-normal\* behavior. - and I define normal as the behavior of the greatest percentage of the population here. ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/50 "2005-03-15T00:00:02Z")
> [@Otto](#): > > Only two? Maybe in the porn _you_ watch. Gosh, _anyone_ knows that porn with more than two guys is just completely deviant! _No_one would ever watch that vile trash. 😃 On a side note, our quiz bowl reader for practices wasn’t there, so I took his place. The damn pop culture set of questions (mind you, we don’t write these) had TWO gay porn questions on it, one a toss-up about Tom of Finland that no one got, and another one where we got 30 points for naming the shared profession of some people, and if we couldn’t get it, 20 for some more famous ones, and then 10 with easier ones if we didn’t get it. I would have gotten it on the 20 points because Danny Sommers was mentioned. Still, no one got it even when the 10 point gave it away with Ryan Idol! Grr. ---
**Author:** ![Bangiadore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b5a626/32.png) [@Bangiadore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bangiadore)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/51 "2005-03-15T14:57:14Z")
I guess I must be a mess or something, because I’m definitely gay, and 93% of my sexual behavior over time has been all about my attraction to men. But I just as definitely _like_ sex with women when it, y’know, just _happens_. In fact, if I had to pick my two favorite sexual partners of all time, one would be my late, great male lover, and the other would undoubtably be a certain French movie starlet I once had a thing with. She and I had a chemistry that was unstoppable, and I couldn’t get enough of her, including orally. So, I can honestly say that I’m not turned off at all by straight sex, in fact I’m all in favor of it – I just don’t really feel compelled to go _looking_ for it. Which puts me, I guess, somewhat in league with the straight gentlemen who’ve replied saying that they have nothing against gay sex, and may in fact have a fantasy or two about it, but it doesn’t drive them either. But I _have_ known tons of straight guys who retch, or pretend to retch, at the mention or thought of sex between men. I’ve had friendships with straight men fall apart because of their need to justify their friendship with gay old me by convincing themselves that _I’m not really gay_. Some have told me one too many times that “you just haven’t met the right woman yet”, and when I did I wouldn’t be gay anymore. Of course my openness to sex with women hasn’t helped disabuse them of this notion. But it gets to a point where it angers me, because _I’m gay, dammit!_, not straight, not “bi”, not lost. And then there have been a few times when I’ve just said to guys who protesteth their straightness a bit too much (presenting it as a somehow superior trait), well, if you’re so damn straight, whip it out and slip it into my mouth, and it’ll stay _soft_! Obviously that suggestion’s usually been meant more to make a point than with any expectation that it would be acted upon. But, on at least three occasions…well, it didn’t stay soft after all. Heh. My suspicion remains that the guys who are most disturbed by the idea of gay sex are the ones who are least secure about their own sexuality. ---
**Author:** ![stpauler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@stpauler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stpauler)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/52 "2005-03-15T16:43:33Z")
Gay here, the thought of straight nookie doesn’t creep me out, it just doesn’t interest me. I’ve got a thing for hairy chests and I have yet to find an attractive woman with one. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/53 "2005-03-15T20:48:09Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > As for anal penetration, i’m not especially grossed out by being either the top or the bottom. I mean, the idea of anal sex with women doesn’t gross me out, so i don’t have a general aversion to the ass. And i’ve had women put their fingers up my butt during sex, and found it pretty stimulating, so the idea of having my ass penetrated doesn’t worry me too much either. Although the typical finger is smaller than the typical erect penis, so that might be a factor. Now if only we could find some gay tentacle porn to see the _other_ size extreme … ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2005, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/54 "2005-03-16T00:08:24Z")
> [@stpauler](#): > > Gay here, the thought of straight nookie doesn’t creep me out, it just doesn’t interest me. I’ve got a thing for hairy chests and I have yet to find an attractive woman with one. 😉 Heh. My feelings exactly. ---
**Author:** ![nevermore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a587f6/32.png) [@nevermore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nevermore)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2005, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701/55 "2005-03-16T03:15:50Z")
> [@Bangiadore](#): > > My suspicion remains that the guys who are most disturbed by the idea of gay sex are the ones who are least secure about their own sexuality. I suspect the same. I wish I could find a link to the article itself, but [this](http://www.philosophy-religion.org/handouts/homophobia.htm) talks about a 1996 study in which homophobic and non-homophobic groups of straight men were subjected to different types of porn. during the gay porn, a significant majority of the homophobes had erections. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-gay-male-dopers-mainly/292701.md?page=2)