# Question for the ladies: How long does it take you to orgasm? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 6, 2005, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669 "2005-02-06T17:10:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/919ad9/32.png) [@rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rabbit)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/1 "2005-02-06T17:10:48Z")
The question is actually serious, I’m having a discussion with a close friend who has a serious self image problem when it comes to intimacy and time to orgasm is one of the problems she **thinks** she has. Based on my experience with the women I’ve dated vs what she tells me about herself, I think she worrying over nothing, but I’d sure as heck love to poll a larger group about it. SO, like the question says, assuming a cold start (not planned, just felt like “scratching the itch” 😉 ), how long does it take you girls to bring yourself to orgasm? (I’m talking about self induced here, toys allowed, but no partner though). In order to keep it honest/real, if you plan on answering, please do so BEFORE you read anyone elses answer, Im not interested in contests, just facts. Thanks lots for those who participate. It is very appreciated. ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/2 "2005-02-06T17:21:52Z")
Alone from a cold start? Anywhere from 5 to 10 minutes. ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/3 "2005-02-06T18:11:28Z")
Well first of all I would point out it took me a long time to learn how to come in the first place. It’s just not quite as…automatic…as it is for guys. So that’s the first way “normal” is not the issue. Secondly, to answer the actual question, it varies. Wildly. Sometimes within minutes. Sometimes a half hour or more (which is often a very fun half hour). Sometimes I just give up and go to sleep. It depends. On how long since I’ve had sex. On how long since I masturbated the last time. On what particularly interesting fantasies I currnently have to work with… Sheesh. What is this obssesion with normal? Human phisology varies. Sometimes even within the same human. So I guess I’m agreeing…your friend in worried over nothing. But why, I have to ask, is she worried? Because she’s coming too quickly? Too slowly? And if she finds out she’s not of the norm, if that can be determined…then what? It’s really whatever floats your (tiny man in the) boat. ---
**Author:** ![sweetfreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@sweetfreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sweetfreak)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/4 "2005-02-06T18:39:48Z")
I have no idea what “normal” is. Sometimes within 5 minutes, sometimes about a half-hour, and sometimes I can’t make myself come at all. I don’t worry about it, though. ---
**Author:** ![BleizDu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9dc877/32.png) [@BleizDu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BleizDu)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/5 "2005-02-06T19:06:16Z")
From 10 to 45 minutes. ---
**Author:** ![Profane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e47774/32.png) [@Profane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Profane)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/6 "2005-02-06T19:14:29Z")
Usually in 1-5 minutes, sometimes as long as 10, depending on ourside factors. I’m very sensitive though, not just there but everywhere. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/7 "2005-02-06T20:29:47Z")
From 5 to 45 minutes. As others have said, it depends on my mood, if it’s cold in the room, if I can close my eyes and fantasize enough, if there is somebody mowing the lawn outside, what I am using to get me there. If it’s taking too long I have given up and gone to bed. Usually though it averages around 10-15 minutes. ---
**Author:** ![FaerieBeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e95f7d/32.png) [@FaerieBeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FaerieBeth)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/8 "2005-02-06T21:39:28Z")
> [@rabbit](#): > > how long does it take you girls to bring yourself to orgasm? (I’m talking about self induced here, toys allowed, but no partner though). > > In order to keep it honest/real, if you plan on answering, please do so BEFORE you read anyone elses answer, Im not interested in contests, just facts. > Thanks lots for those who participate. It is very appreciated. From a completely cold start, I’d say about 10 to 20 minutes. Keep in mind, though, this is with no partner, and I tend to race toward the release on my own. From a completely cold start with my partner, it could take anywhere from 15 minutes to a hour if I feel like prolonging the sweet misery, and we have the time. If we start, and I’m already really heated up - needing it, it could start with the moment he enters me. All things depend on my mood, the atmosphere, and a myriad other things. There have been occasions when I have been ill, stressed, worried, and gave up on myself after about an hour because I could relax enough to let go. ---
**Author:** ![FaerieBeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e95f7d/32.png) [@FaerieBeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FaerieBeth)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/9 "2005-02-06T21:40:34Z")
> [@FaerieBeth](#): > > because I could relax enough to let go. This should say “could **not** relax enough…” ---
**Author:** ![kimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f0a364/32.png) [@kimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kimera)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/10 "2005-02-06T21:43:13Z")
Depends on the type of orgasm. General, run of the mill orgasms can take anywhere from 1-10 minutes. Huge, body shaking, I’m-going-to-die orgasms take longer about 15-30 minutes. ---
**Author:** ![Chotii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@Chotii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chotii)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/11 "2005-02-06T22:05:47Z")
If it’s going to work? 1-5 minutes. Whether it will work depends, as stated by others, depends on what fantasies I can conjure up - though I tend to think in flashes of impressions or feelings, rather than actual pictures (and pictures would work better with fantasies) - whether I can hear someone else rattling around in the house or outside, whether the phone rings etc., where I am in my hormonal cycle - if I’m pregnant, forget it, I’m as good as chemically neutered then - etc. ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/12 "2005-02-07T00:05:50Z")
From a cold start? Hmmm. I generally masturbate before I go to bed, as it helps me “come down” (no pun intended) from the stresses of the day. With a vibrator, it can take anywhere from five to ten minutes. On my own, no toys, it can take fifteen to twenty minutes. ---
**Author:** ![Maxxxie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f14d63/32.png) [@Maxxxie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maxxxie)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/13 "2005-02-07T07:20:27Z")
If I’m masturbating because I need to release some sexual tension, it can be under a minute. If it’s a more run-of-the-mill session, anywhere between 5 minutes and 30 minutes. And, like others, there are times I just give it up as a bad job and roll over and go to sleep 🙂 Max. ---
**Author:** ![grayhairedmomma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/47e85d/32.png) [@grayhairedmomma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grayhairedmomma)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/14 "2005-02-07T18:25:19Z")
I can’t orgasm from masturbation. Even if I am really, really horny I just can’t get into it as well. Masturbation feels to fake and forced to me to enjoy it much. However, I tend to orgasm easily (and have multiple) with at least an adequate partner. Usually. ---
**Author:** ![Q.N.Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3da27b/32.png) [@Q.N.Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.N.Jones)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/15 "2005-02-07T18:51:58Z")
> [@rabbit](#): > > The question is actually serious, I’m having a discussion with a close friend who has a serious self image problem when it comes to intimacy and time to orgasm is one of the problems she **thinks** she has. > Based on my experience with the women I’ve dated vs what she tells me about herself, I think she worrying over nothing, but I’d sure as heck love to poll a larger group about it. Depending on how cold the start: anywhere from a couple of minutes to an outside range of say, 45 minutes, if it’s going to happen at all. Average is about 5-10 minutes. Factors affecting length of time: [li]How aroused I was when beginning [/li][li]How long it’s been since I last had an orgasm (if it’s been awhile, it won’t take long)[/li] The average used to be longer–say, 10-15 minutes–but it got shorter with practice. I figured out what works and what doesn’t. ---
**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/16 "2005-02-07T19:02:25Z")
5 to 20 minutes, typically. ---
**Author:** ![taxi78cab](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e47c2d/32.png) [@taxi78cab](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/taxi78cab)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/17 "2005-02-07T19:17:21Z")
Anywhere from 5 minutes to 20 or so at the longest. ---
**Author:** ![MsPrufrock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb9ed0/32.png) [@MsPrufrock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsPrufrock)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/18 "2005-02-07T19:22:38Z")
It really varies but average is about 15-20 minutes from a cold start. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/19 "2005-02-07T21:24:53Z")
Well, pretty much just like everyone else, anywhere from two minutes to “oh, the hell with it, I’m going to sleep.” There are so many variables that can affect it, I can’t even begin to list them. When I’m _not_ flying solo, so to speak, I usually can’t get there at all, which I’m well aware is usually a comfort issue on my own part. But never mind that now. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![pokey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ebca7d/32.png) [@pokey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pokey)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669/20 "2005-02-07T22:27:56Z")
I can get it done really fast, 45-90 seconds, but I try to make it last longer. On the other hand, I don’t like to spend all day on it. If it isn’t going to happen inside 5 min I will give up. With a vibrator I was always done before I had even really thought about things. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/question-for-the-ladies-how-long-does-it-take-you-to-orgasm/288669.md?page=2)