I usually take the Greyhound bus for my occasional out-of-city trips. Is there really much out there that is not accessible by some kind of bus?
This is a very interesting discussion.
My 18 year-old son had a stroke 6 months ago and hasn’t been able to drive since then. Not driving, in most of America, is a handicap. Depending on your situation, it falls somewhere between occasional inconvenience and major lifestyle disruption. Not driving in the U.S. limits where you live and what sort of jobs you can take. Obviously it is possible to live a full and productive life without driving, but that fact that you don’t drive has to be taken into account when you’re thinking about where you will live and how you will manage the activities of daily living.
I am no lover of driving or automobiles. I dislike driving, and every day I don’t have to drive I consider a success. I have lived without driving for various lengthy periods, and find it refreshing and financially rewarding. But for most places in America, it is a bum option.
I told my son sometime after his 16th birthday that he did not have to learn to drive; driving is not mandatory for citizenship. But once someone has the option to drive and doesn’t do so by choice, they should not depend on friends or family to chauffeur them around simply because they choose not to drive. He could walk, bike, or take the bus (he gets a free pass as long as he’s in public school), but he shouldn’t rely on me or his mother or friends to drive him where he wants to go. So he got his license and learned to drive.
Now that he can’t drive, we are weighing options. We are looking at buying a house down on the flats where he won’t have to walk a mile up and down a steep hill to the nearest bus stop. Biking is not a good option for him because the stroke ruined his visual perception, so biking is if anything more dangerous than driving. He might be able to drive again some day; I hope so, not because I have any love of driving, but because it is so much easier to live in this country as a driver. If he is never able to drive again, well we will deal with it, won’t we? Right or wrong, it’s something he’ll have to consider for the rest of his life.
I learned how to drive when I lived at home with my parents (I actually learned to drive on a stick shift but I really have no idea if I could still do that), took the test once, failed on a few technicalities, and never took it again. It wasn’t like I planned not to retake it, I just had other stuff going on, and somehow I never got back to it. After I left home I was never in a position where owning a car made sense financially or practically, so I never pursued the license again.
I’ve lived in several different cities in Canada and Europe, and have travelled extensively, and not driving has genuinely never been a problem. When you don’t own a car, you plan your life with that in mind - you look for apartments within walking distance of work or a bus stop, you grocery shop more often and carry everything home, etc. I’m in grad school right now and money is tight, so owning a car wouldn’t make much sense for me even if I had a license. I either walk, bike, or ride the bus everywhere. I really don’t ever mooch rides off other people - if none of my standard options work, I call a cab.
The only time it’s even slightly an issue is when I go to visit my parents. Their house is outside of a smallish town, the nearest bus stop is a fair hike away, and the bus service is poor. Fortunately, when I’m visiting it’s usually for a brief time and there are enough relatives around that we generally do things in groups anyways. If I lived there full-time, it would be a major problem. From visiting them I really get where people get the idea that living without driving is near impossible, because it would be for them. People who drive a lot often set their lives up such that driving is an absolute necessity. There’s nothing intrinsically wrong with that, but it doesn’t mean that driving is necessary for everyone.
ETA: If, in the future, driving seems necessary to me, I have no issue with taking some lessons and retaking the test. I have nothing against driving, I just don’t have the money and time to put into getting licensed and don’t currently see a reason to do it.
I do have a driver’s licence, but I haven’t had a car for 25 years, so I think I can comment. I use public transport a lot. When that’s not possible or convenient within Sydney, I get a taxi.
I don’t drive, but I do live in central London. Most of my friends here either don’t drive at all or have a licence but haven’t driven for years.
Driving lessons cost about £25 each, and you’d probably need about 30 to have a chance of passing. The provisional driving licence (that you need before learning to drive) costs £50. The theory test is £31, and the practical test is at least £62 plus 2 hours’ lessons.
So we’re talking close to a thousand quid, and that’s if you pass first time. Car insurance in central London would be astronomical, fuel is very expensive and parking is often either expensive or non-existent.
On the flipside, it would be handy to have a licence so that I could rent a car or van to collect items won on Ebay, and it would be nice if I could rent a car when I go to America this year. Living in the sticks in the future isn’t really an option. But on a day-to-day basis it makes no difference to my life whatsoever. I’ve had a lift in someone else’s car twice in the past 7 years, so I’m definitely not an annoying friend constantly bumming a ride.
I also have sleep disorder and faint a lot; I’m not legally allowed to even learn to drive until it’s under control.
I do drive, but I’m considering discontinuing that practice after I move (later this year). If I can find a place where I won’t need a car to get to work, I’ll probably get rid of my car. I don’t particularly need it for anything else, and going without would save some money (not to mention headaches – flat tires, overheating, etc.). I might join a car sharing service.
I live in a region with a good - not without its problems, but good - transit system, that covers multiple cities. When I’m not here, I’m in a city that’s small enough that I can walk pretty much anywhere I need to go. (Although it’s a bit hilly, so I’m very glad for the benches that are scattered along one of the main streets, what with my lung issues.)
The only limitation I’ve encountered is when job hunting and finding ones that require driver’s licences. (Idiotic for non-driving jobs. Grr.)
I do drive, but in evaluating places where I want to retire I always think “Can I live here if I can’t drive?”.
The thing is, as ZipperJJ says, out here if you don’t have a car you are indeed that person who always needs a ride. I used to go to the SCA dance class and inded picked up another dance class member all the time. I didn’t mind too much, but then he started asking could his girlfriend come along, too? And I started feeling a bit like a chauffer service. (At least they did not both sit in the back.)
And he can only have jobs on the bus line, and around here, that’s not much. Sure, it’s his choice not to have a car, but then he shouldn’t be trying to bum rides from all and sundry.
All that aside, I see no problem in big cities to go without a car - but I still couldn’t do it. Our families are far-flung and plus I love driving on vacation. We are going to Montreal in a couple of weeks and we will drive. I wouldn’t mind taking a train but the bus is crazy long for that distance.
But then you probably couldn’t pay me enough to live in a real big city, anyway. 
Well, I live in downtown London…:D. Or near enough. I live in zone 2.
And no, I don’t feel it limits me. God, a car would mean paying for parking, petrol, insurance, the congestion charge…all to move at a crawl in the inner city, where the tube could have got me there in half the time.
If I want to visit anyone outside London, I’ll take the train.
I used to live in Auckland, NZ, and - since I’ve never had a license - I didn’t drive there either - but I was a teenager and didn’t have the cash for a car. I took buses. I had to wait for about half an hour for any bus that went from my parents’ place to my friends’ (all on the North Shore). When I moved out at 17, I had to wait for half an hour to catch a bus from the city centre (where I lived) to visit my parents over on the Shore.
That was pretty limiting. I put up with it because I didn’t have the cash to do otherwise, but if I’d lived there any longer, I’d have got myself a motorbike and a license for that. Here in London, I haven’t seen the need. I’m 23, for what it’s worth, so it’s possible that like others I’ll learn later in my twenties - but while I’m living in London, I’m not so sure the costs will ever outweigh the benefits.
I never learned to drive, through a combination of my mom not wanting to teach me and my own inertia in my teens. I am 25 now, have been living on my own for 7 years, and plan on doing it soon, because it’s a skill worth having. Unfortunately when you don’t drive, you have to become a burden on someone around you in order to learn. 
My boyfriend won’t mind teaching me though. I doubt I’ll ever own a car but it would be nice to know I’m physically/legally able to drive one if need be.
I live in a burb close to the city limits of Philadelphia. There are trains and buses all over this area that can get me almost anywhere I would need to go in good time (including up and down the East coast to visit my family). Additionally, I like walking, even long distances, and I own a bicycle. There are stores where I can buy anything I would need a walk or bike ride away.
People I know (I know a ton) offer to give me rides I don’t want or need, a lot. Sometimes they get insistent - they are only being kind and/or failing to grasp the fact that this is how I like to live my life and I’d rather not feel beholden to people for wasting gas driving me around. Truly, if I didn’t enjoy walking/biking, I would have a car by now.
I’m not a big one for going places to do stuff. When I do, it’s usually in/near South or Center City Philadelphia, and taking the train makes more sense; and if driving is easier, I usually do these types of things with a friend or three anyway, and they all drive. I give them gas money if we’re taking a trip, and don’t ask them to chauffeur me around otherwise.
Of course when you don’t have a car, you have to plan your life around it in some ways. I don’t like long commutes (this would be true if I did have a car I suspect), so I only work close to where I live so I can walk or bike directly there in a reasonable time. I’ve been living in the same apartment a long time, but when I move I will have to take my lack of car into careful consideration.
It’s really not inconvenient at all. And it saves me so much money.
[hit-and-run snark]It’s my experience that even most people who have driver’s licenses and cars don’t know how to drive.[/hit-and-run snark]
It’s kind of interesting being so used to not having a car, and observing car culture. My parents live about three blocks from my sister. They’re all health conscious and walk several miles per day. But they still drive over to to each other’s houses.
Why are you asking then if your mind is already made up that if you don’t live in a major metropolitan area, you are bumming rides? What do you want to know - that outside the US, there are places with working public transport, so people can manage without a car, only because you live outside a metropolitan area, you can’t manage without a car, so there’s no need to change anything at all?
Yes, I don’t have a car or a drivers license; no, I don’t feel my freedom is limited at all, because I can always find alternatives, I’m just forced to look where the car-owners hop into their car and drive without a second thought. No, I don’t live in the US or the countryside; yes, if I did live in the countryside, I would probably need a car or a different solution. My city, besides having pretty good public transport, also has several “city car” clubs where for a monthly basic fee you can rent a car when you need one, because the average person uses the car 1 hr/ day, for the rest it’s standing around, costing money and needing space, so a dozen or score of people can use the same car after one another.
I haven’t gotten a drivers license yet because the opportunities to practise driving are too far, so I don’t feel it’s a good idea to learn driving and then letting the skills rust for two years, esp. given that driving in a big city is plenty stressful and requires a lot of skill.
Besides, it’s far cheaper to have no car: no down payments, no insurance, no car tax, no layback for repairs, no garage - and that without the running costs of high gasoline prices.
I also find that 95% of the time, public transport is far superior in terms of comfort: I’m not stuck in a traffic jam; I don’t have to concentrate activly on driving when I’m tired late at night, but can read or knit or sleep, so the time is more productive; I don’t have the hassle of trying to find a parking space in the inner city; …
There are only a few cases where a car would be useful:
transporting big and heavy stuff. For that, I have relatives, and it’s not bumming because everybody asks to borrow a car for that, since most people own a small car, but occasionally need a big one for transport. Also, when you need help carrying the wardrobe or whatever, relatives and friends will help you anyway.
being out late at night in the suburbs. That happens when my mother goes to her choir, but she could as well team up for a group ride. When I’m visiting people in the countryside, they are all used to this, either taking me back to the last train, or having a spare bed to spend the night on.
having small children: doesn’t apply to me, but trying to corrall two or more children to get child A to ballet, while collecting child B from primary school and having child C in the backseat is easier with a car than trying to move a pram down and up stairs and making sure that nobody gets lost. Although the Automobile clubs point out that most children who are injured or die in traffic do so not as pedestrians or bikers, but when sitting in their parents cars.
I’m 34, married with two kids, and don’t know how to drive. Actually, I’ve never lived in a household that had a car.
I live where public transportation is vastly superior to most of the U.S., yet in a large country with long distances and a strong car culture compared to most of Europe. My utter lack of driving has mostly to do with money. I grew up poor, and getting a driver’s license is ridiculously expensive here: around 1200 euros (1700 USD).
I never had that kind of money when at the appropriate age, and getting the piece of plastic would’ve gotten me nowhere by itself: starting from scratch (I had no hand-me-down cars available etc.), I figured it would cost me around 5000 euros to actually get behind a steering wheel (the license, the beater car, the insurance, the winter tires, the fuel etc.) Only recently have I begun to amass that kind of surplus wealth, after decades of low-paying jobs and intermittent unemployment.
I plan to get myself a license and a car sometime soon, as it makes sense employment-wise, though only barely so money-wise. I’m not exactly thrilled at hitting the highway for the first time at this age, fully aware of the risks involved, and with more than just my own well-being at stake. I’ve always been a bit of a timid dreamer, not really good at fast thinking and assertive action. Maybe I don’t even have what it takes to drive. Who knows?