# Questions about movies you certainly have no intention of seeing **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 18, 2011, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323 "2011-05-18T14:48:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Mr.Excellent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f19dbf/32.png) [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/81 "2011-05-19T16:50:58Z")
> [@Alka\_Seltzer](#): > > I don’t think that is correct. The alien queen grew inside the cloned Ripley, and thus gained a womb. In the alien-verse, it appears the aliens take on some of the characteristics of their host, such as the dog-like alien in Alien 3. It’s probably more accurate to think of the human-alien as Ripley’s grandson. I don’t remember anything about Ripley “mating” with an alien. > > In any case, it’s not a great film… Thanks for summarizing this more clearly than I could. I disagree, though, about the quality of the film. It certainly isn’t as great as the first three movies (the director’s cut of Alien 3 is very, very good), but it’s a fine film in its own right, and it stays true to the major theme of the earlier movies: Ripley _suffers_. ---
**Author:** ![llcoolbj77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/eb9ed0/32.png) [@llcoolbj77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llcoolbj77)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/82 "2011-05-19T16:51:28Z")
> [@Justin\_Credible](#): > > It’s right beside the “Wings Stay On/Wings Fall Off” switch. Thank you for the laugh! My secretaries think I am going crazy in my office. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![HubZilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ccd318/32.png) [@HubZilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HubZilla)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/83 "2011-05-19T16:52:47Z")
> [@Bakhesh](#): > > To be honest, people slag off Avatar way more than than was justified. The plot was derivative and pedestrian sure, but so are a LOT of action movies. Avatar’s plot is probably about average for films of this type. The visuals easily justified the cost of admission. The level of detail you could see on the Imax was jaw dropping (might look a lot less impressive on DVD). > > Yeah sure, it wasn’t Citizen Kane, but I’ve checked, and Citizen Kane doesn’t have a single combat exoskeleton or six legged horse thing, and that’s supposed to be the best film ever? This. When you spend zillions on a non-sequel movie with great special effects, you probably don’t want to go too edgy with a story. ---
**Author:** ![HubZilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ccd318/32.png) [@HubZilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HubZilla)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/84 "2011-05-19T16:57:35Z")
The Garfield movies. They made the cat look like the comics. I noticed in the trailer for the first that Odie was just a regular dog. Did they make him a CGI character like his comic in the next? ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/85 "2011-05-19T16:58:34Z")
> [@Max\_Torque](#): > > Remember how they came up with Isla Sorna, “Site B”, for the second movie? It happens there. The plot is, some rich guy’s jackass kid goes paragliding with his uncle right by Site B, contrary to local law, and ends up getting stranded there. So, the rich guy (who turns out not to be very rich) hires Dr. Grant and some mercenaries to go to the island and find his kid. Dinosaurlarity ensues. Weren’t they on Site B in the book the Lost World, too? ---
**Author:** ![lost4life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c4cdca/32.png) [@lost4life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lost4life)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/86 "2011-05-19T17:00:14Z")
This is timely. I tried to sit through **The Matrix 2 & 3** when they were on TV this week, but find it an impossible task. So what happens? Please tell me the machines win! For everyone asking about Twilight, the way to watch this and any other movie you have no normal intention of seeing is with [Rifftrax](http://www.rifftrax.com/). The Twilight series was some of the funniest shit I’ve seen. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/87 "2011-05-19T17:07:49Z")
Quoth **Ellen Cherry** : > [@](#): > > If it is possible, I am more grateful to this thread for ensuring that I never see Alien Resurrection (Sigourney Weaver MATES with an alien queen??) Y’know, before this thread, if anyone had asked me “Hey **Chronos** , you want to see Sigourney Weaver in a lesbian sex scene?”, I would have said “Hell yes”. I think I can say that I’m a wiser man now, as a result of reading this. Quoth **Smapti** : > [@](#): > > Is it [Avatar] really just “Dances With Wolves” meets “Ferngully” with CGI? No, not at all. They shamelessly ripped off a bunch of other sources, too. Which isn’t actually all that bad a thing. There’s no new plot ideas in fiction, just new combinations of them. And it wasn’t a plot-driven movie, anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/88 "2011-05-19T17:10:45Z")
> [@](#): > > This is timely. I tried to sit through The Matrix 2 & 3 when they were on TV this week, but find it an impossible task. So what happens? Please tell me the machines win! Eventually? Trinity dies, the boss of the machines asks for help in bringing the Agent Smiths (plural; he’s turning everyone in the Matrix into copies of himself) back under control, Neo fights Smiths for a while, then lets himself get assimilated, and then gets crucified thereby destroying all the Smiths, and the machines realize that the whole war with the humans thing was all just one big misunderstanding and everything’s hunky-dory now. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/89 "2011-05-19T17:13:51Z")
> [@Dietrich\_K](#): > > They live in a secluded, anachronistic village in modern times. The “monsters” are just the village elders trying to scare the young folks’ curiosity about the outside world away. Worse yet, the village was founded by a group of people who were seeing grief counselors (the guy who got the idea was dealing with the murder of his dad), who apparently decided that modern society sucks rocks and made them all sad, and they should chip in together and make an awesome old-school village to hide away and raise happy kids. I gather that they assumed they’d never produce murderers amongst their own people. (Oops. One of their developmentally-disabled teens stabs a romantic rival out of jealousy, and dresses up as a monster too.) They paid off the government to treat their village and the surrounding woods as a no-fly zone **and** as a super-important wildlife preserve so they wouldn’t encounter outsiders or have planes fly overhead and confuse people. ---
**Author:** ![Alka\_Seltzer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c89c15/32.png) [@Alka\_Seltzer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alka_Seltzer)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/90 "2011-05-19T17:14:29Z")
> [@Mr.Excellent](#): > > Thanks for summarizing this more clearly than I could. I disagree, though, about the quality of the film. It certainly isn’t as great as the first three movies (the director’s cut of Alien 3 is very, very good), but it’s a fine film in its own right, and it stays true to the major theme of the earlier movies: Ripley _suffers_. I didn’t hate it, I felt there was a decent film trying to get out, but that it didn’t quite work. > [@Chronos](#): > > Quoth **Ellen Cherry** :Y’know, before this thread, if anyone had asked me “Hey **Chronos** , you want to see Sigourney Weaver in a lesbian sex scene?”, I would have said “Hell yes”. I think I can say that I’m a wiser man now, as a result of reading this. You don’t need to worry, Ripley does not get it on with an alien. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/91 "2011-05-19T17:22:58Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > and then gets crucified thereby destroying all the Smiths You forgot the best part of this – this part happens in the “real world”. The “interesting” interpretation of this is that the “real world” is simply another level of the Matrix since there are clear violations of physics involved, but a better interpretation is that the writers either didn’t realize they weren’t in the Matrix anymore, or didn’t care, or thought it would be all mysterious and shit. ---
**Author:** ![Caricci](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Caricci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caricci)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/92 "2011-05-19T17:50:10Z")
> [@alice\_in\_wonderland](#): > > Uh oh - so what’s the big secret of _The Village_? It’s modern times and the monster isn’t real. ---
**Author:** ![lost4life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c4cdca/32.png) [@lost4life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lost4life)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/93 "2011-05-19T17:57:10Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Eventually? Trinity dies, the boss of the machines asks for help in bringing the Agent Smiths (plural; he’s turning everyone in the Matrix into copies of himself) back under control, Neo fights Smiths for a while, then lets himself get assimilated, and then gets crucified thereby destroying all the Smiths, and the machines realize that the whole war with the humans thing was all just one big misunderstanding and everything’s hunky-dory now. Woah…crucified you say? ---
**Author:** ![amarinth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@amarinth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amarinth)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/94 "2011-05-19T18:20:01Z")
Thor? It’s a perfectly ok movie. Not great. Not bad. An enjoyable way of killing $10 & two hours. > [@panamajack](#): > > Speaking of Ms. Owens, does she actually die in _Last Holiday_? (I think that was the title of the one where she’s notified she has X weeks/months/minutes to live). No. They find out that the spots on the X-ray (or whatever it was) are not cysts or tumors, but instead the machine is broken and puts spots on whatever it’s taking pictures of. LL Cool J goes to tell her. They admit they’ve been in love with each other for years, but never said anything, and she ends up with exactly enough money to quit her job, marry him, and open up an award winning restaurant - which is her life long dream. ---
**Author:** ![drastic\_quench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e36b37/32.png) [@drastic\_quench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drastic_quench)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/95 "2011-05-19T18:33:11Z")
Ripley mates with the queen, unless that series of shots was just them snuggling. Seriously, they’re holding each other in the dark, and then “babby is formed”. Short of an X rated shot, I think the director implied as much as he dared. Some brave soul that owns it should turn on the commentary. ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/96 "2011-05-19T18:37:11Z")
> [@Ellen\_Cherry](#): > > And here I thought he was just this drowned kid in a lake. He was until Friday the 13th Part 6. That’s the part he rose from the dead for the first time and officially became a supernatural entity. He was human in all the movies before that (and just continually surviving all the kill “attempts” at the end of every one). ---
**Author:** ![Alka\_Seltzer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c89c15/32.png) [@Alka\_Seltzer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alka_Seltzer)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/97 "2011-05-19T18:37:23Z")
> [@drastic\_quench](#): > > Ripley mates with the queen, unless that series of shots was just them snuggling. Seriously, they’re holding each other in the dark, and then “babby is formed”. Short of an X rated shot, I think the director implied as much as he dared. Some brave soul that owns it should turn on the commentary. When exactly please? Because your recollection does not match with mine. IIRC, when Ripley encounters the queen it is already big with child, and then it gives birth. ---
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/98 "2011-05-19T18:37:43Z")
All right, since we’ve already spoiled “The Village,” can anyone tell me what happens in “The Happening”? ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/99 "2011-05-19T18:39:59Z")
> [@Dietrich\_K](#): > > Oh … okay. Makes _perfect_ sense to me! > > /sarcasm If you can buy most religious bullshit it all makes perfect sense. Even if you don’t buy it but can understand it, it makes decent enough sense. -Joe ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2011, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323/100 "2011-05-19T18:44:55Z")
> [@joebuck20](#): > > All right, since we’ve already spoiled “The Village,” can anyone tell me what happens in “The Happening”? People in the northeastern part of the US go crazy and try to kill themselves in various ways. It’s probably due to plants making spores to thin out the humans’ numbers because we’re fucking up the planet in a big way, but that’s mostly a theory - we do know it seems to be plants exuding invisible Bad Stuff into the air, which is carried on the wind, and at least initially hits larger groups/population centers harder. Eventually they just stop doing it, and when we think everything’s all hunky-dory, people in Paris start acting weird. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-about-movies-you-certainly-have-no-intention-of-seeing/582323.md?page=6)