# Questions you've never dared asked about the Harry Potter universe **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 30, 2005, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680 "2005-12-30T03:54:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/1 "2005-12-30T03:54:26Z")
I’ll start the ball rolling. My inquiry concerns the Engorgement Charm, a way of enlarging any body part. I think I need not expound on the potential applications. So is using it for enhancement considered vulgar? ---
**Author:** ![Translucent\_Daydream](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/translucent_daydream/32/16170_2.png) [@Translucent\_Daydream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Translucent_Daydream)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/2 "2005-12-30T04:19:40Z")
I wanna know if any of the students staying past their OWLs ever have to leave the school because they got knocked up… I also wanna know about the “Hogwart’s Hoes.” That could be the next series… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Diceman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Diceman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diceman)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/3 "2005-12-30T04:31:37Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > I’ll start the ball rolling. My inquiry concerns the Engorgement Charm, a way of enlarging any body part. I think I need not expound on the potential applications. So is using it for enhancement considered vulgar? As long as you don’t engorge yourself to freakish proportions, I don’t see any problem 🙂 I wonder if something like Viagra exists in the magical world. I can see the advertisements now: “Is your wand not as rigid as it used to be? Is your marriage suffering because you can’t cast those ‘love spells’ like you could when you were 20? Ask your doctor for Wizagra[sup]TM[/sup].” ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/4 "2005-12-30T04:40:06Z")
Fred Rogers vs. Barney the Dinosaur. Who wins? ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/5 "2005-12-30T04:41:15Z")
Sorry, folks. That was supposed to be a new thread. Dangit. ---
**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/6 "2005-12-30T04:58:47Z")
The invisible cloak. You KNOW it’s been used to peep at stuff. What if you accidentally yelled a magic spell when you…would the spell become active? There’s the emotional component, right? I can see the problems there… Who was the first to try an inter-species mating? ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/7 "2005-12-30T13:09:08Z")
> [@](#): > > Who was the first to try an inter-species mating? Somebody and a veela? ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/8 "2005-12-30T14:37:33Z")
> [@Translucent Daydream](#): > > I wanna know if any of the students staying past their OWLs ever have to leave the school because they got knocked up… > > I also wanna know about the “Hogwart’s Hoes.” > > That could be the next series… 😃 There’s some powerful enchantment on the school that prevents this. It’s in _Hogwarts: A History._ Hermione knows all about it, but she never tells anyone. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/9 "2005-12-30T14:53:34Z")
How do the non-muggle-born remain so steadfastly clueless about the real world? In the first movie, they didn’t know what guns were. “It’s a kind of wand the muggles use to kill each other.” How the hell did they not know what guns were??? “What is the significance of a rubber duck?” It’s a freaking toy, you boob! I was gonna ask, what do all those tens of thousands of wizards you see in the stands for the Quiddich World Cup do for a living, but I think the previous questions have answered that question: they’re making Engorgio potions… ---
**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/10 "2005-12-30T15:45:23Z")
What vices do wizards enjoy? Since with magical medicine you’d assume that a hangover can be cured instantly, do they drink a lot? Does Herbology create a lot of stoner wizards? ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/11 "2005-12-30T16:42:05Z")
Is birth control done magically? If so, do witches have periods or are they also stopped magically? If birth control is magical, does the Catholic Church condone it or not? Are the Weaslies Catholic? It seems they are a stereotype of Irish-Catholics, with the red-hair and the loads of children. What Professors are married? Did Dumbledore have children? With whom? Has polyjuice potion ever been used to enter the opposite sex locker room/shower? What keeps muggle parents(like Hermione’s) from telling everyone about magic? ---
**Author:** ![cher3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cher3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cher3)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/12 "2005-12-30T17:08:45Z")
> [@Love Rhombus](#): > > What vices do wizards enjoy? Since with magical medicine you’d assume that a hangover can be cured instantly, do they drink a lot? Does Herbology create a lot of stoner wizards? Both Hagrid and Professor Trelawney have been shown overindulging in regular old booze. They both seem to have paid the usual price in hangovers for it, too, although neither one is known for magical skill. ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/13 "2005-12-30T17:21:43Z")
> [@Mahaloth](#): > > Has polyjuice potion ever been used to enter the opposite sex locker room/shower? Heck, you get a hair from the right person and you don’t even need to leave your bedroom. ---
**Author:** ![ISiddiqui](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/97f17d/32.png) [@ISiddiqui](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ISiddiqui)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/14 "2005-12-30T17:53:07Z")
> [@Mahaloth](#): > > What keeps muggle parents(like Hermione’s) from telling everyone about magic? I always wondered about that one. Perhaps some big time magical threats? Oh, and the ‘naughty’ applications of magic just have to wait until “Harry Potter and the Morning Wood” 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Rodgers01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b19c9b/32.png) [@Rodgers01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rodgers01)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/15 "2005-12-30T18:10:53Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > I’ll start the ball rolling. My inquiry concerns the Engorgement Charm, a way of enlarging any body part. I think I need not expound on the potential applications. So is using it for enhancement considered vulgar? So does everyone in the wizarding world have the proportions of Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee? :eek: > [@](#): > > What keeps muggle parents(like Hermione’s) from telling everyone about magic? I, in general, just want to know what the hell Hermione’s parents are _doing_ this whole time. I think all we know about them is that they’re dentists. But they’re apparently nice, loving parents, so how come they don’t take a more active part in Hermione’s life? Why don’t we ever see them? We’ve seen more of Harry’s parents, and they’re dead. I also want to know why the wizards don’t adapt some of the Muggle world’s inventions to their own purposes. Come on, e-mail is faster than owls. I know, I know – owls are more prosaic, but still. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/16 "2005-12-30T18:18:13Z")
Actually, the owls make sense for me. If you want to use email, you have to have a computer, and a phone line, and an ISP, and software, and muggle money, none of which most wizards have the first clue about. With owls, all you need is owls, mice, paper, envelopes, and money. ---
**Author:** ![Fretful\_Porpentine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fretful_porpentine/32/2873_2.png) [@Fretful\_Porpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretful_Porpentine)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/17 "2005-12-30T19:14:38Z")
> [@](#): > > I wanna know if any of the students staying past their OWLs ever have to leave the school because they got knocked up… I think we’ve already had an answer, in the person of Andromeda Black Tonks. Snape is about 36, as of the beginning of OotP (per JKR, in interviews). Snape used to hang out with Bellatrix Lestrange in school (per Sirius in GoF). This doesn’t necessarily mean they’re the same age, but it does suggest they’re unlikely to be more than two or three years apart. Bellatrix is Andromeda’s OLDER sister (per HBP), making Andromeda, at most, around 38 at the beginning of OotP. Andromeda’s daughter has to be at least 22 at the beginning of OotP (18 when she finished school + 3 years of Auror training + 1 year as a qualified Auror). Of course, I’m not sure JKR actually sat down to do the math on this one 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/18 "2005-12-30T19:36:41Z")
> [@Mahaloth](#): > > What keeps muggle parents(like Hermione’s) from telling everyone about magic? There’s probably some kind of gag spell that stops them from blabbing to anyone not in the know. Easy compared to after-the-fact memory charms, which the Ministry uses so lavishly. What I wonder is **why** wizards want to keep their existence a secret from Muggles. “They might want magical solutions to their problems!” So what? What else is magic good for? In Muggle society we have all kinds of problem-solving specialists – doctors, lawyers, engineers, financial consultants – we could easily accommodate a category of professional wizards, and pay them well. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2005, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/19 "2005-12-30T20:16:14Z")
I’ve always wondered what the wizards’ religion would be. (See this old thread: [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=190401](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=190401)) ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2005, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680/20 "2005-12-31T02:35:48Z")
> [@](#): > > With owls, all you need is owls, mice, paper, envelopes, and money. And shovel, just to be accurate. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/questions-youve-never-dared-asked-about-the-harry-potter-universe/337680.md?page=2)