# Quick, get 'em now! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 2, 2006, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115 "2006-01-02T21:21:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![kidchameleon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/898d66/32.png) [@kidchameleon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidchameleon)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/81 "2006-01-03T12:55:39Z")
> [@Aeschines](#): > > **drmark2000** , let’s leave these children be, as I suggested earlier. WTF? Can’t you make decisions on your own? If you want to leave the thread, leave it. You don’t need to stick in the thread because **drmark** or **mswas** are. Christ, you might as well change your name to Ramora if you’re going to hang on like that. ---
**Author:** ![Heckity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a5b964/32.png) [@Heckity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heckity)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/82 "2006-01-03T13:07:57Z")
**King of Soup** > [@](#): > > Stupid frogs didn’t even realize how badly they were outclassed. Returned home to change into dry shoes and socks, like some famous male fashion guy this time. Stupid frogs. That is hilarious. I dunno for entertainment value alone - I find the efforts of **Aeschines** and **drmark2000** quite gratifying. A little like watching wee tykes with their hands over their eyes screaming, “you can’t see me”, or better yet, hands over ears, tongues awagging, yelling, “I can’t hear you”. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/83 "2006-01-03T13:27:46Z")
I was invited here to do battle from the “Dark Christ” thread. Those who challenged me, drmark2000 and Aeschines, don’t seem capable of putting up a proper fight, though. They are correct, however, in their belief that they function on an entirely different level than the common run of Doper. ---
**Author:** ![parthenokinesis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/cc9497/32.png) [@parthenokinesis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/parthenokinesis)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/84 "2006-01-03T13:29:03Z")
> [@drmark2000](#): > > I choose my words with exceeding care, as did James Joyce. And I’m slicing you all up with a combination of practiced ease and sadness, as did Joyce. I got no dog in this fight, but I just gotta say, Dude, Joyce wrote like six words a day. Maybe we’d all be better off if you followed his shining example in that way as well. ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/85 "2006-01-03T13:53:45Z")
Wow. Mswas’ ailment sounds strangely like his valve[sup]\*[/sup] is acting up. [sup]\*[/sup]vague literary reference. A penny for the first poster who names it. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/86 "2006-01-03T14:00:43Z")
> [@Smeghead](#): > > I badly needed that laugh, **King of Soup**. Seconded. Thanks for a delightful start to a dark and stormy day. What’s that? Is the maid screaming? ---
**Author:** ![Zeriel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/58956e/32.png) [@Zeriel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeriel)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/87 "2006-01-03T14:23:45Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > They are correct, however, in their belief that they function on an entirely different level than the common run of Doper. That’s one of the better “zing!” lines I’ve seen in the last few months–well done! ---
**Author:** ![Crotalus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crotalus/32/41_2.png) [@Crotalus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crotalus)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/88 "2006-01-03T14:49:07Z")
> [@NurseCarmen](#): > > Wow. Mswas’ ailment sounds strangely like his valve[sup]\*[/sup] is acting up. > > [sup]\*[/sup]vague literary reference. A penny for the first poster who names it. A Confederacy of Dunces? ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/89 "2006-01-03T15:36:55Z")
> [@Crotalus](#): > > A Confederacy of Dunces? Do you accept PayPal? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Crotalus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crotalus/32/41_2.png) [@Crotalus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crotalus)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/90 "2006-01-03T15:43:04Z")
> [@NurseCarmen](#): > > Do you accept PayPal? > 😃 The pleasure of getting it right is reward enough. It has been a long time since I read that book. ---
**Author:** ![drmark2000](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@drmark2000](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drmark2000)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/91 "2006-01-03T16:14:30Z")
> [@The King of Soup](#): > > I think the **dr** is off the **mark** here. It was _shepherds’ pie_ Joyce sliced up with a combination of practiced ease and sadness. Bread, he sliced with verve and bold insouciance. Golf shots in his hands were generally sliced with innocence and childlike curiosity. The record does not mention Joyce slicing _anything_ with inane comparisons and accidental comedy. My reference was to _Dubliners_, in which I do not believe that shepherds’ pie, nor indeed golf, make an appearance. Bread, it’s probably in there somewhere, but not as a major character. > [@The King of Soup](#): > > Can you guys imagine what this fella’s diary must look like? You don’t want to know. Believe me, you don’t want to know. But it’s not like the passage below, droll though it certainly is, and worthy of repeat in its entirety, for illustrative purposes that I will make apparent shortly thereafter: > [@The King of Soup](#): > > \*Dear Diary: Woke up early this morning, having slept like a modern Alexander. Peed like Bucephalus. Showered with the courage and attention to detail of DeGaulle. Toweled off with a thoroughness reminiscent of Sinatra, with a touch of Thomas More around the ankles. Poured and ate bran cereal with the grim determination of Increase and Cotton Mather combined. Dressed like Edith Head. I mean, as tastefully as she would have had she been a man. Got the mail elegantly, like Cary Grant squared. Spotted some intellectual inferiors at the pond and toyed with them for a while, like Socrates among frogs. Stupid frogs didn’t even realize how badly they were outclassed. Returned home to change into dry shoes and socks, like some famous male fashion guy this time. Stupid frogs. > > Spent afternoon bestriding the narrow world (of the internet) like a Colossus, pausing to eat a taco with the joyful exuberence of Marceau. Dappled shirt with green sauce like Picasso. Hid stain behind napkin with the cunning of Rommel, the better to attract women like, um – > > Returned home triumphant and laurel-laden like Darius I, pausing to shout at some more inferiors on the way, essaying subtle jibes like Churchill did toward Lady Astor. Then, ran like Owens toward the finish line. Got home in time for Jeopardy!, which I watched with the attention and skill of DeBakey. Now to brush my teeth like Saint Augustine and then an early bedtime, which I greet with the calm equanimity of Siddhartha Gautama, knowing that in everything I do I equal or exceed the best that humanity has yet produced.\* Here the whole process comes beautifully full circle. I could not have contrived the evolution of this thread any better. Finnegan can begin again. Among all those names you drop, the one I didn’t recognize was DeBakey. A little Google, a little Wiki, among others, and the next thing I know I have some leads, and at least the basic information on someone with whom I was unfamiliar! Would this be the inventor of the M_A_S\*H unit, the “magician of the heart” whose motto is “Strive for nothing less than excellence.”? Fascinating! And much appreciated! This is what I refer to when using the phrase, “Grinding through tons of ore to get at the button of gold,” or some variation thereof. After all the negation and hostility that this thread was originally created to engender, I end up getting just what I wanted out it, and so very much more. This thread will serve as a centerpiece for… nah, leave ‘em guessing, Mark. Leave ‘em guessing. Now, you fellas wind this baby up with a little more of your signature lameness, or drag it out as long as you like. The terms several of you seem to favor are “fellate” and “circle jerk” which, transparently enough, you attribute to others. God, how I wish you’d stop making it so easy. ---
**Author:** ![Atticus\_Finch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ec9cab/32.png) [@Atticus\_Finch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atticus_Finch)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/92 "2006-01-03T16:39:42Z")
> [@drmark2000](#): > > After all the negation and hostility that this thread was originally created to engender… Nah, just wanted to laugh at you. That and the shooting into the sun thing, but all in good time. Btw, negation doesn’t mean what you think it means. ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/93 "2006-01-03T23:16:49Z")
> [@drmark2000](#): > > I, all by my lonesome, can out think anyone at a canter, on these boards or anywhere else. As an official, acreditted Doctor of Clinical Psychology, what would you say about someone who thinks he is smarter than everyone else in the world? Especially someone who reads _GD’s_ as _Aeschenise’s_? And thinks that the internet is fucking with his coding? ---
**Author:** ![JeffB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jeffb/32/188_2.png) [@JeffB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JeffB)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/94 "2006-01-03T23:57:02Z")
> [@Harborwolf](#): > > And what time is this ultimate deconstruction going to arrive? I work 9-5 most days, and I’d simply hate to miss it. I’m guess December 25 at noon (Mountain Time). ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2006, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/95 "2006-01-04T00:02:44Z")
Wow I joined the wrong circle jerk, there are only three of us in mine, but dozens of you in the other one! I feel cheated! I have a question. How come when someone says they can’t understand me it makes sense to everyone, but when I say the same person cannot understand me people think it’s offensive? I’m not insulting someone by saying “you aren’t getting it”. I am simply stating fact. If both me and the person in question agree that they aren’t getting it, where’s the problem? Contrary to popular belief I do not creatively redefine words. I assault the definitions that people use that support their bias at the expense of other equally valid usages of the word. For instance, I am not the only one who has called the atheist contingent on these boards out for acting like members of a religion. **Left Hand of Dorkness** And others in the Supernatural thread in Great Debates have a definition of Supernatural that I agree with. I think people who want to call themselves skeptics link independent clauses that shouldn’t be linked quite a lot. Mysticism does NOT mean “That which is bullshit”, and neither does Magic. No, not everyone agrees with the limited anthropomorphic definition of God, and I can point to quite a few sources from many religions that agree with me about the nature of God. Though, most of the people I am usually arguing with will reject any source I could possibly come up with as not being valid. It doesn’t matter that I point to Sufi scholars, Ancient Qabbalistic texts, or writers on Parapsychology, because all these self-avowed atheist skeptics know that these books are bullshit and don’t need to read them in order to know they are bullshit, because of course ASSUMING things about other people is the right and true skeptical way. Other people share the definition that the Universe is “All that exists” I think that sums up most of the words I have attempted to “creatively redefine”. So maybe, possibly, it could be that there is some validity to it when I say, “I disagree that the way you are using the word is the way ‘everyone’ uses that word.” I am not sitting here bashing people as being unutterably stupid, or saying that they can’t possibly compare to my intellect. I am bashing people who think _I_ am stupid because _THEY_ cannot understand me. So how about everybody look down at their high horse, realize that it’s imaginary, fall flat on your ass and we’ll all be on equal ground, how’s about that? **Maureen** If you are too lazy to read my descriptions of the word, or see why I pointed it out, I am not going to post it again. Go read the thread that was quoted, or read the description in this one that I posted for Left Hand of Dorkness. I was trying to illustrate a point about trying to describe something where the language one is using falls short, and describing the difference between making up a word outright like “Respainspurtay”, or combining two existing terms like “Dark Christ” both have their respective problems, and I tried to illustrate why. Respainspurtay is like “Ohm” with more syllables in the same way that House, Disestablishmentarianism, Word, Concept, Country, Person, Anal Probe, are all “Ohm” with more syllables. If you can’t be bothered to attempt to think about something, you can certainly ridicule it, but don’t think that it makes you more intelligent than the person you’re not understanding. I know what I am talking about, it is oftentimes difficult to communicate, and I am aware that much of the time the “Not understanding” part comes down to communication difficulties. **Guinistasia** It’s easy to make sense when you aren’t delving that deeply into something, just like it’s easy not to drown if you stay in the shallow end of the pool. I think the majority of my 1 line posts make sense as well. At least I haven’t had that many complaints about them. Erek ---
**Author:** ![Syntropy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2006, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/96 "2006-01-04T00:26:45Z")
Who’s a cranky little saviour, then? Climb down off the cross a second and take a step back. What you said in this thread was that it was a word you used to release pain. To me, that basically _is_ an ohm with more syllables. I don’t discount that ohms can be used as a focal point to release emotional stress and pain. Quite the contrary. It’s been reported by a great many people as helpful. I wasn’t being dismissive, if that’s what you thought. Merely acknowledging the explanation. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2006, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/97 "2006-01-04T00:50:47Z")
> [@mswas](#): > > Wow I joined the wrong circle jerk, there are only three of us in mine, but dozens of you in the other one! I feel cheated! This is a great line! I’ve only been skimming this thread but I had to pop in and cogratulate this line. Carry on. ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2006, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/98 "2006-01-04T01:10:55Z")
> [@Maureen](#): > > Who’s a cranky little saviour, then? Climb down off the cross a second and take a step back. > > What you said in this thread was that it was a word you used to release pain. To me, that basically _is_ an ohm with more syllables. I don’t discount that ohms can be used as a focal point to release emotional stress and pain. Quite the contrary. It’s been reported by a great many people as helpful. I wasn’t being dismissive, if that’s what you thought. Merely acknowledging the explanation. Well actually it’s a word that popped into my head when I released a very specific type of pain. Ohm is supposedly the sound of the first word that Shiva uttered at the creation of the Universe. There is something about it having multiple timbres that vibrates up and down the system of the body. It’s not quite the same, but similar. Ohm is supposed to be the ‘root’ word from which all other words are derived, thus my statement about it being no more like Ohm than any other words. Something I find interesting is how much “I Am” and “Ohm” are similar which are the first things that God spoke according to Abrahamic faiths as well as Hindu faiths. Erek ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2006, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/99 "2006-01-04T01:12:00Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#): > > This is a great line! I’ve only been skimming this thread but I had to pop in and cogratulate this line. Carry on. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2006, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115/100 "2006-01-04T01:16:03Z")
> [@mswas](#): > > Something I find interesting is how much “I Am” and “Ohm” are similar which are the first things that God spoke according to Abrahamic faiths as well as Hindu faiths. > > Erek Question: What is the pronunciation of the word(s) meaning “I am” in any of the ancient languages in it may have been uttered? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/quick-get-em-now/338115.md?page=6)