# Raise your glass! Great toasts. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 9, 2007, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114 "2007-07-09T23:13:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2007, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/41 "2007-07-10T21:49:35Z")
[QUOTE=Jackknifed Juggernaut] I’ve been using this one for a while (wives and girlfriends and not sweethearts). Do you know the source? [/QUOTE] I always heard it was one of the daily Royal Navy toasts. Apparently, that’s the source; [this site](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demographics_of_the_United_States) lists the Royal Navy toasts and the days of the week on which to use them. ---
**Author:** ![Jayrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Jayrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jayrot)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2007, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/42 "2007-07-10T22:06:15Z")
There’s also the Homer Simpson classic: - To alcohol! the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems\* ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2007, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/43 "2007-07-10T22:11:12Z")
From a song I heard on a Harry Belafonte album: Old King Cole was a merry old soul And a merry old soul was he Called for his pipe and he called for his bowl And he called for his privates three “Beer! Beer! Beer!” said the privates, "Merry men are we! “There’s none so fair as can compare with the fighting infantry!” ---
**Author:** ![Quint](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/76d3ee/32.png) [@Quint](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quint)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2007, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/44 "2007-07-10T22:16:07Z")
Here’s tae us; wha’s like us? Damn few — and they’re a’ deid! ---
**Author:** ![Labdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/439d5e/32.png) [@Labdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Labdad)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2007, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/45 "2007-07-10T22:40:08Z")
Here’s to the land we love and the love we land!" ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2007, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/46 "2007-07-10T22:50:18Z")
From H.P. Lovecraft’s early short story [“The Tomb”](http://www.dagonbytes.com/thelibrary/lovecraft/thetomb.htm): > [@](#): > > Henceforward I haunted the tomb each night; seeing, hearing, and doing things I must never recall. My speech, always susceptible to environmental influences, was the first thing to succumb to the change; and my suddenly acquired archaism of diction was soon remarked upon. Later a queer boldness and recklessness came into my demeanor, till I unconsciously grew to possess the bearing of a man of the world despite my lifelong seclusion. My formerly silent tongue waxed voluble with the easy grace of a Chesterfield or the godless cynicism of a Rochester. I displayed a peculiar erudition utterly unlike the fantastic, monkish lore over which I had pored in youth; and covered the fly-leaves of my books with facile impromptu epigrams which brought up suggestions of Gay, Prior, and the sprightliest of the Augustan wits and rimesters. One morning at breakfast I came close to disaster by declaiming in palpably liquorish accents an effusion of Eighteenth Century bacchanalian mirth, a bit of Georgian playfulness never recorded in a book, which ran something like this: > > Come hither, my lads, with your tankards of ale, > And drink to the present before it shall fail; > Pile each on your platter a mountain of beef, > For 'tis eating and drinking that bring us relief: > So fill up your glass, > For life will soon pass; > When you’re dead ye’ll ne’er drink to your king or your lass! > > Anacreon had a red nose, so they say; > But what’s a red nose if ye’re happy and gay? > Gad split me! I’d rather be red whilst I’m here, > Than white as a lily and dead half a year! > So Betty, my miss, > Come give me a kiss; > In hell there’s no innkeeper’s daughter like this! > > Young Harry, propp’d up just as straight as he’s able, > Will soon lose his wig and slip under the table, > But fill up your goblets and pass 'em around > Better under the table than under the ground! > So revel and chaff > As ye thirstily quaff: > Under six feet of dirt 'tis less easy to laugh! > > The fiend strike me blue! l’m scarce able to walk, > And damn me if I can stand upright or talk! > Here, landlord, bid Betty to summon a chair; > l’ll try home for a while, for my wife is not there! > So lend me a hand; > I’m not able to stand, > But I’m gay whilst I linger on top of the land! ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2007, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/47 "2007-07-10T23:10:46Z")
And of course, as [the good book says](http://youtube.com/watch?v=D-rKiGJrcNw), _To us and our good fortune! Be happy! Be healthy! Long life! And if our good fortune never comes here’s to whatever comes! Drink l’chaim… to life!_ [cue dance, then cue Russians] ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/48 "2007-07-11T00:04:43Z")
[QUOTE=brewha] And yet another variation. Seems to be a popular theme. Oddly enough this was also a rugby thing. Here’s to the bee that got the bull a’buckin Here’s to Adam and Eve who got the whole world fuckin … [/QUOTE] Here’s a bowdlerized version: Here’s to the bee that stung the bull, and got the bull to buckin’. Here’s the the apple that came to Eve, And got the world to…eatin’ apples! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ca3799](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9f8e36/32.png) [@Ca3799](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ca3799)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/49 "2007-07-11T01:05:11Z")
Here’s to ya, and at ya, and back at ya again. If I hadn’t of met ya, I betcha I wouldn’t have let ya. But since I met ya, and I let ya, I betcha I let ya again. ---
**Author:** ![CapnPitt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/edb3f5/32.png) [@CapnPitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CapnPitt)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/50 "2007-07-11T01:41:51Z")
Well, this isn’t so much one toast as it is a series of toasts that will pretty much get you loaded: [The Barley Mow](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Barley_Mow) ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/51 "2007-07-11T03:27:02Z")
_If all be true that I do think, There are five reasons we should drink: Good wine, a friend, or being dry, Or lest we should be by and by, Or any other reason why._ I first came across it labeled as an anonymous quote, but Google seems to say it’s from Henry Aldrich. And although I don’t say it when it’s time to toast, the lyrics to the Refreshment’s song “Mekong” always come to mind when we talk about giving toasts. The chorus: \*But is it true It’s always happy hour here and if it is I’d like to stay a while Well as cliche as it may sound I’d like to raise another round And if your bottle’s empty Help yourself to mine Thank you for your time And here’s to life \* ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/52 "2007-07-11T03:36:41Z")
One of my Marine brothers came back with this one, it’s the one my whole family drinks to when one of them comes home: Here’s to us and those like us…damned few left. ---
**Author:** ![percussion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/43a26b/32.png) [@percussion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/percussion)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/53 "2007-07-11T03:40:09Z")
“Here’s to a long live and a merry one; A quick death and an easy one; A pretty girl and an honest one; A cold beer and another one.” is the standard here ---
**Author:** ![JoeSki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b487fb/32.png) [@JoeSki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JoeSki)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/54 "2007-07-11T03:55:11Z")
For shots: “Here’s to all the shots never taken.” ---
**Author:** ![Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de053/32.png) [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/55 "2007-07-11T21:42:10Z")
[QUOTE=Spoons] I always heard it was one of the daily Royal Navy toasts. Apparently, that’s the source; [this site](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demographics_of_the_United_States) lists the Royal Navy toasts and the days of the week on which to use them. [/QUOTE] Thanks, although that link isn’t right. [This](http://www.hmsrichmond.org/toast.htm) one works. ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2007, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/56 "2007-07-11T22:02:07Z")
In my teens I spent a couple months in London and met up with a bunch of Irish students. We went to the pub nearly every night and I learned this one: [first person]: Cheers, big ears! [everyone else in unison]: Fuck you, noddy! Fast forward about 20 years and I found myself at my current job. The first time my coworkers and I went out for a drink after work, I was blown away to hear: [first person]: Cheers, big ears! [everyone else in unison]: All the best, big chest! I hadn’t heard the intro in all that time, and now have a more PG alternative to the original version. In case I ever hear it again. ---
**Author:** ![MrFloppy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/43a26b/32.png) [@MrFloppy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrFloppy)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2007, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/57 "2007-07-12T00:00:15Z")
Big Ears and Noddy are popular book/cartoon characters enjoyed by generations of British kids. [Noddy - Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Noddy) Just in case some dopers didn’t realize. Anyway, me and the guys use this one for shots: _May your ear holes turn to arseholes and shit all over your shulders._ Not sure of the origin. ---
**Author:** ![movingfinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@movingfinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/movingfinger)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2007, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/58 "2007-07-12T04:13:16Z")
May we live as long as we want to, and may we want to as long as we live. ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2007, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/59 "2007-07-12T12:51:50Z")
[QUOTE=MrFloppy] Big Ears and Noddy are popular book/cartoon characters enjoyed by generations of British kids. [Noddy - Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Noddy) Just in case some dopers didn’t realize. [/QUOTE] Mystery solved- thanks! ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2007, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114/60 "2007-07-12T13:42:06Z")
[QUOTE=Jackknifed Juggernaut] Thanks, although that link isn’t right. [This](http://www.hmsrichmond.org/toast.htm) one works. [/QUOTE] Thanks, although I’m wondering what happened there. I wasn’t raising a glass each time I read an entry in the thread, honest! 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/raise-your-glass-great-toasts/411114.md?page=4)