# Rampaging man hurls his Polish sausage at police

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rampaging-man-hurls-his-polish-sausage-at-police/348867>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [March 18, 2006, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rampaging-man-hurls-his-polish-sausage-at-police/348867 "2006-03-18T03:49:37Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 4\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rampaging-man-hurls-his-polish-sausage-at-police/348867/1 "2006-03-18T03:49:37Z")

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So some guy on Chicago’s northwest side ran out of his house naked and went bonkers on a few parked cars. When police arrived, he began throwing knives and his penis at the officers.

Well, read it for yourself.

[http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/11884225/](http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/11884225/)

> [@](#):
>
> “About 10 feet from the front porch, right on the sidewalk, was his penis,” said [Sgt.] Dolan.

I’m not a cop, but if I were, I know I’d be the guy out of the 6 or so cops on the scene who’d actually get hit in the face with the flying dick. Hell, there could’ve been _50_ cops on the scene, and I know that flying wiener would’ve somehow found its way throught the melee, to my head.

Yeah, I wouldn’t have walked away from this with a laceration on my forearm from a flying butcher knife, leaving a cool scar and a story to tell my grandkids. No-- I’m pretty sure I’d have walked away from this with a mushroom stamp on my forehead, and…a story for my wife to tell my grandkids.

Glad I’m not a cop.

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**Author:** ![if6was9](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e47c2d/32.png) [@if6was9](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/if6was9)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rampaging-man-hurls-his-polish-sausage-at-police/348867/2 "2006-03-18T04:03:27Z")

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I have to say, I’ve been messed up by a couple of women, pretty bad some might say… and at NO TIME did dismemberment ever cross my mind. 😛

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**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rampaging-man-hurls-his-polish-sausage-at-police/348867/3 "2006-03-18T04:14:33Z")

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You’re a little [late](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=363237)

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**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rampaging-man-hurls-his-polish-sausage-at-police/348867/4 "2006-03-18T05:48:56Z")

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Since this is the second thread about this today, off to Close Land it goes. (But you can visit the first thread in **picunurse** ’s post above.)