# Random Big Bang Theory quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [December 20, 2016, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196 "2016-12-20T00:24:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 20
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2017, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/381 "2017-03-30T22:12:20Z")
**Amy:** Have I ever told you you’re like a sexy praying mantis? **Sheldon:** Every time you drink alcohol. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2017, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/382 "2017-03-31T01:48:57Z")
Sheldon does not HAVE a cousin Leo. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2017, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/383 "2017-03-31T04:30:36Z")
**Penny:** How did you even get in, you weirdo? **Sheldon:** Yeah, really? I’ve seen strange men traipsing in and out of here for years, but when I do it, it’s weird? ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2017, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/384 "2017-03-31T21:23:55Z")
Really. You need an inhaler to breath earth air, he can’t eat earth nuts, but I’m the alien. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2017, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/385 "2017-04-01T00:26:19Z")
It’s OK: it’ your Millennium Falcon. You and Chewbacca do whatever you want. Me and Princess Leia here (_gestures toward Raj_) will find some other way to spend the evening. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2017, 9:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/386 "2017-04-01T09:19:57Z")
While Leonard is not considered a tall fellow in our country, in today’s North Korea, he’s downright average. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2017, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/387 "2017-04-01T19:58:13Z")
Tweepadok. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2017, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/388 "2017-04-01T20:49:33Z")
**Raj:** Has your assistant said anything about me? **Sheldon:** Oh, in fact, she has. Uh, her exact words were, “What is that guy’s problem?” **Raj:** I’m in her head. Let the dance begin. ---
**Author:** ![Brooky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@Brooky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brooky)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2017, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/389 "2017-04-04T05:03:14Z")
Oh these are cute, of course if I get them I’ll have to rent my womb out to a gay couple ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2017, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/390 "2017-04-04T06:12:37Z")
Oh, good, Leonard, you’re here. Science news. This will interest you. And, Penny, feel free to paint your nails. ---
**Author:** ![Brooky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@Brooky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brooky)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2017, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/391 "2017-04-05T06:53:42Z")
I don’t want five bucks! I want my dignity! Oh what’s that, ten bucks? ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2017, 7:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/392 "2017-04-05T07:53:12Z")
Oh! Ow! Blueberry in my nose! Blueberry in my nose! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2017, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/393 "2017-04-05T13:45:02Z")
Leonard: You’re going march yourself over there right now and apologize [to Penny]! Sheldon: Pfffft. Leonard: What’s funny? Sheldon: Wasn’t that sarcasm? Leonard: No! Sheldon: Oh. Boy, you are all over the place this morning. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2017, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/394 "2017-04-05T15:08:37Z")
**Dr. Stephen Hawking:** What do Sheldon Cooper and a black hole have in common? They both suck! Neener, neener, neener! ---
**Author:** ![Brooky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@Brooky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brooky)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2017, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/395 "2017-04-06T05:35:33Z")
You’re cruisin for beaton Wheaton! ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2017, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/396 "2017-04-06T07:20:43Z")
**Wil Wheaton:** Sheldon, do you really think we’re going to fight? **Sheldon:** My fists are not up here because I’m milking a giant, invisible cow. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2017, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/397 "2017-04-06T13:45:44Z")
Sheldon: I think that you have as much of a chance of having a sexual relationship with Penny as the Hubble Telescope does of discovering that at the center of every black hole is a little man with a flashlight searching for a circuit breaker. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2017, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/398 "2017-04-06T23:57:40Z")
Call me Leonard. Dr. Hofstadter is my father. And my mother. And my sister. And our cat. Although I’m pretty sure that Dr. “Boots” Hofstader’s degree is honorary. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2017, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/399 "2017-04-07T13:16:44Z")
Queen Penelope AFK; _wha-aaat?_ ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2017, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/400 "2017-04-07T13:24:53Z")
I’m surprised you struck out with Penny. Apparently she’s a big ol’ 5. (“Big ol’ 5,” 4, 2, whatever, is part of the vernacular around here. If you are enthusiastic about something-- not just sex-- you say “I’m a big ol’ 5 for that.” Not so enthusiastic? Big ol’ 1.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196.md?page=19) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196.md?page=21)