# Random Big Bang Theory quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [December 20, 2016, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196 "2016-12-20T00:24:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 21
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2017, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/401 "2017-04-07T19:01:21Z")
**Alex:** I’m sure you get hit on all the time. **Leonard:** Right. Because girls are always like: “Oooh, that guy owns two Star Trek uniforms and gets lots of ear infections. I gotta get me some of that.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2017, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/402 "2017-04-07T19:52:53Z")
Leonard: You convinced me. Maybe tonight we should sneak in and shampoo her carpet? Sheldon: You don’t think that crosses a line? Leonard: Yes! For God’s sake, Sheldon, do I have to hold up a sarcasm sign every time I open my mouth? Sheldon: You have a sarcasm sign? ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2017, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/403 "2017-04-08T00:37:15Z")
Shouldn’t you be out with your gang spray painting equations on the side of buildings? ---
**Author:** ![Brooky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@Brooky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brooky)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2017, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/404 "2017-04-11T11:41:04Z")
My my, the plot like my gravy thickens ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2017, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/405 "2017-04-12T07:26:29Z")
Everywhere you go, guys hit on you, even if I’m standing right there. And they’re all taller than me. WHY IS EVERYONE TALLER THAN ME? ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2017, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/406 "2017-04-12T11:54:03Z")
Old, broken things are so much better than new things that work. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2017, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/407 "2017-04-12T14:08:29Z")
> [@Brooky](#): > > Where are you going Lovey Dovey? Come back ~~~~ I already ordered 20lbs of bird seed on Amazon! Get back here, you stupid bird, so I can love you. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2017, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/408 "2017-04-12T16:20:41Z")
Jewelry? Seriously? Sheldon, you are the most shallow, self-centered person I have ever met! Do you really think another transparently manipulative - Oh, it’s a tiara! Put it on me, put it on me, put it on me, put it on me. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2017, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/409 "2017-04-13T00:10:42Z")
**Howard:** [_talking about his new car_] It’s parked in 294. **Sheldon:** I’m sorry, 294 is my parking spot. **Raj:** You don’t even drive. **Leonard:** Maybe they’ll reassigned it because you don’t use it. **Sheldon:** I don’t use my nipples either, maybe they should reassign those. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2017, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/410 "2017-04-14T15:08:18Z")
Sheldon (to Leonard, who has decided to give up on Penny): Well, at least now you can retrieve the black box from the twisted, smoldering wreckage that was once your fantasy of dating her and analyze the data so you don’t crash into Geek Mountain again. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2017, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/411 "2017-04-14T17:04:23Z")
**Bernadette:** Gosh, Amy, I’m sensing a little hostility. Is it maybe because like Sheldon’s work, your sex life is also theoretical? ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2017, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/412 "2017-04-14T22:36:06Z")
And he really does have [a girlfriend], you jerks on the comment board. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2017, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/413 "2017-04-15T06:58:17Z")
**Sheldon:** [_he picks up the tub of VapoRub and sits on the couch opposite Amy_] Now, you may notice some tingling… **Amy:** Oh, I’m counting on it! ---
**Author:** ![Brooky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@Brooky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brooky)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2017, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/414 "2017-04-15T23:55:14Z")
Just remember with great power comes great responsibility ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2017, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/415 "2017-04-16T00:33:49Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > **Sheldon:** [_he picks up the tub of VapoRub and sits on the couch opposite Amy_] Now, you may notice some tingling… > **Amy:** Oh, I’m counting on it! You w-want to (voice cracks) _rub something on my chest_? ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2017, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/416 "2017-04-16T06:34:26Z")
I can’t return these things if there’s chunks of duck all over them. ---
**Author:** ![Brooky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@Brooky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brooky)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2017, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/417 "2017-04-23T05:26:10Z")
Do you think we an out run him? I don’t need to out run him, I just need to out run you! ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2017, 8:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/418 "2017-04-23T08:51:22Z")
I’m not a stranger to dice games. I was the Temple Beth-El Hebrew School Yahtzee champion. ---
**Author:** ![Brooky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@Brooky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brooky)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2017, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/419 "2017-04-24T04:13:34Z")
Your desperate need for friendship makes you weak ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2017, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196/420 "2017-04-24T04:45:44Z")
\*\*Penny: **Oh, you poor thing. Is having a real-life girlfriend who has sex with you getting in the way of your board games? \*\* Leonard:** Little bit, yeah. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196.md?page=20) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-big-bang-theory-quotes/775196.md?page=22)