# Random Thoughts thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 25, 2001, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120 "2001-11-25T06:10:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/1 "2001-11-25T06:10:10Z")
Post your random thoughts here. I wonder what ever happened to UPs #1-6? If I’m pre-approved for a credit card, why do I have to fill out an application? Isn’t duck tape terribly cruel? Do the other fish laugh and point at the one that bites the worm? How come you never see busts of Pallas anymore? Is this Edgar Allen Poe’s fault? What do porn stars watch while masturbating at home? Let’s say that one time I had fucked a goat, would that really be so ba…no, nevermind, Forget I mentioned it. Does the fact that he named his company “Micro Soft” indicate that Bill Gates has performance problems in bed? Does K-Mart ever have a blue light special on blue lights? How come flammable and inflammable mean the same thing, but edible and inedible don’t? ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/2 "2001-11-25T06:58:11Z")
If cats had oposable thumbs, they’d smoke a lot of pot. A lot. ---
**Author:** ![TheNewbie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/db5fbb/32.png) [@TheNewbie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheNewbie)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/3 "2001-11-25T07:06:59Z")
Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes? If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors? Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing? Why am I up right now? I’m going to bed ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/4 "2001-11-25T07:25:16Z")
If someone is a resident of Mons, Belgium, does that mean he is a Monster? Why is the American version of the game called football if only a few of the plays involve actually kicking the ball? Where do people who work at resorts go on vacation? Where’s the Head Office of the Anarchists? ---
**Author:** ![Frosfir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ac91a4/32.png) [@Frosfir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frosfir)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 7:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/5 "2001-11-25T07:34:18Z")
My random thoughts… What are my random thoughts? Why am i always being told that i suck? ---
**Author:** ![galen\_ubal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/galen_ubal/32/4440_2.png) [@galen\_ubal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/galen_ubal)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 8:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/6 "2001-11-25T08:03:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Weirddave \* > Let’s say that one time I had fucked a goat, would that really be so ba…no, nevermind, Forget I mentioned it. Only if it was a kid. ---
**Author:** ![Genseric](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Genseric](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Genseric)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 8:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/7 "2001-11-25T08:29:12Z")
I can’t decide which is funnier… > [@](#): > > I was going to join The Pessimists Club, but I didn’t think they would accept me. or the more ironic > [@](#): > > I was going to join The Optimists Club, but I didn’t think they would accept me. I’m currently in favor of the second. Here’s another I just came up with > [@](#): > > I was going to join the Grammar Police, but I didn’t think they would except me. ---
**Author:** ![Cougarfang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c67d28/32.png) [@Cougarfang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cougarfang)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/8 "2001-11-25T13:33:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by elfkin477 \* > \*\*If cats had oposable thumbs, they’d smoke a lot of pot. A lot. \*\* Why would we need pot when we have catnip? 😃 My random thoughts? HOLY SHI- (looks at forum) MACKEREL, that was a HUGE hairball… What’s for dinner? Hi Opal! TUMMYRUB TIME! Heyyyyy, it’s Frosfir! How YOU doin? 😃 Why the _BEEP_ am I posting on this thread? [sub]immediate afterthought: Postcount padding, of course.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Dragwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dragwyr/32/2855_2.png) [@Dragwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragwyr)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/9 "2001-11-25T20:07:41Z")
Well, my random thoughts always seem to revolve around sex so I’ll just keep them to myself. ---
**Author:** ![Scribble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scribble/32/3317_2.png) [@Scribble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scribble)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/10 "2001-11-25T20:24:20Z")
Random questions that have come to mind: What happens to the order of the universe if you listen to AM radio after noon? What tune does a tuna fish play? What kind of polarity do polar bears have? Positive or negative? North or south? ---
**Author:** ![Bossk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7feea3/32.png) [@Bossk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bossk)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/11 "2001-11-25T20:26:33Z")
People would be much more humble if it took them hours and hours to poop, like aquarium fish. It’s hard to be an aloof snob with a three-foot turd tail following you wherever you go. ---
**Author:** ![Kbean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Kbean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kbean)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/12 "2001-11-25T20:33:38Z")
If you were traveling cross country on a three-story canoe, then how many belgian waffles would it take to build a doghouse? ---
**Author:** ![techchick68](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@techchick68](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/techchick68)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/13 "2001-11-25T21:12:45Z")
> [@](#): > > Isn’t duck tape terribly cruel? Yes but duct tape is awesome shit, man. Random thoughts: I hate Sunday’s without my Broncos. If you haven’t, try Good Earth’s Spiced Tea, it’s good stuff. I should be cleaning but instead I am on the 'net. The weather outside is frightful… Damn. ---
**Author:** ![Nefarious\_Chipmunk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nefarious_chipmunk/32/1045_2.png) [@Nefarious\_Chipmunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nefarious_Chipmunk)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/14 "2001-11-25T22:34:46Z")
I just cleaned out the fish tank, bought a new air stone, and my fish didn’t even notice. He is just sitting there with a terd hanging off his butt. Go fish. ---
**Author:** ![Zyada](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zyada/32/3028_2.png) [@Zyada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zyada)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/15 "2001-11-25T22:46:21Z")
It’s 72 degrees, sunny and I need to trim my tree. It just doesn’t feel quite right somehow. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Mad\_Hermit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b5ac83/32.png) [@The\_Mad\_Hermit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Mad_Hermit)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/16 "2001-11-25T22:52:16Z")
The sky has interesting shades of red and purple tonight. My cat just charged into the room, asked for and ate a potato chip, and charged out. Kordell Stewart looks like a real quarterback this year. ---
**Author:** ![VitrolicBump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a587f6/32.png) [@VitrolicBump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VitrolicBump)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/17 "2001-11-25T22:55:55Z")
No one’s getting presents for Christmas this year. They don’t deserve 'em. Why the hell am I sick? Aaaahhh!!! Why’d I smash that spider? This song sucks… I like pencils. I do way too many happy dances in real life. I am so glad the high was finally something comfortable. 63 is such a nice temperature. And it rained…yay! I’m running out of freakin’ Kleenex. It’s all the dog’s fault. She ate our last box. _muttering_ I’m hungry. Time to see what isn’t in the cupboards today. ---
**Author:** ![Dirty\_Earthworm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Dirty\_Earthworm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dirty_Earthworm)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/18 "2001-11-25T23:17:46Z")
If Goofy is a dog and he wears pants, why doesn’t Pluto? Who invented chalk? How does a hair know when it’s been cut? And oh yeah … I hate love. -Syko ---
**Author:** ![VitrolicBump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a587f6/32.png) [@VitrolicBump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VitrolicBump)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2001, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/random-thoughts-thread/95120/19 "2001-11-25T23:25:02Z")
When I read **Syko’s** comment about Pluto, I thought of this one… Why does Donald wear just a shirt and Mickey wears just shorts? Why don’t they both just wear full outfits? Oh, and I wasn’t kidding about my dog eating our last box of Kleenex. Apparently it tastes good. Stupid dog. I hate psychology. It makes me feel like I have a whole bunch of disorders. I can’t though. Or can I?