# Rank the Arnold Schwarzenegger characters in badassery
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [February 13, 2014, 12:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241 "2014-02-13T12:42:00Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2014, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/21 "2014-02-13T21:46:31Z")
> [@Morbo](#):
>
> How can it not be John Matrix, based on the absurd things he managed to do in the movie?[ul][li]Smells the bad guys coming[/li][li]Jumps out of an airplane at takeoff speed, lands in the marsh, is not injured[/li][li]Throws off something like twelve guys that have fat raided him in the Mall[/li][li]Rips bolted seats out of a Sunbeam Alpine[/li][li]Holds bad guy over a cliff one handed with his arm extended[/li][li]Picks up Bill Duke like a tin can and tosses him through one of those thick glass brick shower walls, also walls between hotel rooms. (He eats Green Berets for breakfast; was hungry)[/li][li][Murders the shit](http://youtu.be/t9Qp5Dmm88M) out of about 200 soldiers, including slicing the top of two guys’ heads off with circular saw blades thrown like Frisbees[/li][li] Picks up a blunt iron pipe and throws it like a giant dart **through** the bad guy’s body with such force that it punctures another pipe behind him so that steam can escape. “Let off some steam, Bennett!”[/li][/ul]
That was my pick as well. Commando is awesome because the action scenes are so over the top yet they are done with a straight face. He is supposed to be just a regular guy in it as well rather than a sci-fi hero- just a father trying to save his little girl.
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### Author:  [@Cuckoorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cuckoorex)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2014, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/22 "2014-02-13T22:06:33Z")
I agree with the initial list, minus the Termicheater. Conan has badass nailed.
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### Author:  [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2014, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/23 "2014-02-13T22:12:19Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#):
>
> [This](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDxn0Xfqkgw)is appropriate here
So is this: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FFQ\_g8OoQM](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FFQ_g8OoQM)
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### Author:  [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/24 "2014-02-14T00:37:54Z")
You’re forgetting the badassery that was [Howard Langston](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvSoeJfvMh8) in Jingle All The Way.
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### Author:  [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/25 "2014-02-14T01:32:59Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#):
>
> That was my pick as well. Commando is awesome because the action scenes are so over the top yet they are done with a straight face. He is supposed to be just a regular guy in it as well rather than a sci-fi hero- just a father trying to save his little girl.
Well, a regular guy who’s also a Delta Force Colonel. And also he has the power of the Infinite Ammo Cheat Code. In the 6th Day he’s just some pilot (slash clone).
OP’s order is pretty good.
I think non-physical skills/psychological warfare should be accounted for. John Matrix is clearly an expert liar and can disarm his enemies with his false promises about the time and nature of their death. Conan apparently gets power from the lamentations of women. Bad puns apparently power Mr. Freeze.
Honorable mention: Rainier Wolfcastle. Mid-high in badassery, I’d say.
“Bye, book!”
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### Author:  [@Mississippienne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mississippienne)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/26 "2014-02-14T03:47:01Z")
> [@dasmoocher](#):
>
> Maybe it had something to do with causing Batman’s nipples to be hard.
>
> The Wikipedia entry describes him as thus:
> So, as a two-time decathlete, he probably could be included in a ranking, although near the bottom.
If Mr. Freeze is allowed his freeze ray plus armor, he could be a formidable opponent. I’d rank him near the middle of Schwarzenegger’s characters, although he is from by far the worst movie (yes, that’s including _Twins_ and _Jingle All The Way_.)
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### Author:  [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/27 "2014-02-14T04:09:04Z")
> [@thelurkinghorror](#):
>
> Well, a regular guy who’s also a Delta Force Colonel. And also he has the power of the Infinite Ammo Cheat Code. In the 6th Day he’s just some pilot (slash clone).
Commando is the best action movie ever made outside of the sci-fi or fantasy genres which is what I think we are looking for here. The only other contender is Rambo. Arnold basically plays the role of a superhero - except he isn’t. He is just an incredibly manly man that can pull off unbelievable stunts just to save his daughter. The movie is incredibly campy but also one of his most quotable works even if it isn’t as well known as the others.
The audacity of stunts in that performance can’t be matched by any of the others IMHO. As mentioned earlier, he jumps out of a plane after takeoff without a parachute and doesn’t even get hurt and pulls off some extreme feats of strength by dropping someone over a cliff after holding him for a while with just one hand. When asked about it later, he says “I let him go”. There is no way you can beat that in any of his other movies. That is just one of a series of hilarious lines that he uses in this flick.
In short, Arnold is like Superman in Commando except he is just a regular (albeit really large and strong) guy who wants to get his daughter back at all costs and kill anyone that threatens either of them. You just don’t see that in the modern superhero movies.
All the other Superhero movies and even most of Arnold’s other movies have some precious back stories and special advantage because of technology or mythology. That doesn’t apply to Commando. It is all about raw badassery. Arnold is just a really big and strong guy that is doing what he needs to do and isn’t out to save the world. He just wants his daughter back home the rest of the world be damned. The action sequences and dialogue are both entertaining and funny.
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### Author:  [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/28 "2014-02-14T04:31:37Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#):
>
> When asked about it later, he says “I let him go”. There is no way you can beat that in any of his other movies. That is just one of a series of hilarious lines that he uses in this flick.
>
> In short, Arnold is like Superman in Commando except he is just a regular (albeit really large and strong) guy who wants to get his daughter back at all costs and kill anyone that threatens either of them. You just don’t see that in the modern superhero movies.
Harry Tasker, at his truth-serum-fueled best (_“yah, but dey vere all bad”_) does okay.
“Is there anything else you’d like to tell me before we start?”
“Yah. I’m gonna kill ya pretty soon.”
“I see. How, exactly?”
“First I’m gonna use you as a human shield; den I’m gonna kill dis guard over here wit da Patterson trocar on da table, and den I was tinkin about breakin your neck.”
“And what makes you think you can do all that?”
“You know my handcuffs?”
“Mmm-hmm.”
“I picked 'em.”
[/everything he says happens]
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### Author:  [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/29 "2014-02-14T05:04:31Z")
> [@Mississippienne](#):
>
> If Mr. Freeze is allowed his freeze ray plus armor, he could be a formidable opponent. I’d rank him near the middle of Schwarzenegger’s characters, although he is from by far the worst movie (yes, that’s including _Twins_ and _Jingle All The Way_.)
Don’t go hatin’ on T_wins_, a fine movie even though Arnold is not at his most badassedness.
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### Author:  [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/30 "2014-02-14T05:17:22Z")
> [@Morbo](#):
>
> How can it not be John Matrix, based on the absurd things he managed to do in the movie?[ul][li]Smells the bad guys coming[/li][li]Jumps out of an airplane at takeoff speed, lands in the marsh, is not injured[/li][li]Throws off something like twelve guys that have fat raided him in the Mall[/li][li]Rips bolted seats out of a Sunbeam Alpine[/li][li]Holds bad guy over a cliff one handed with his arm extended[/li][li]Picks up Bill Duke like a tin can and tosses him through one of those thick glass brick shower walls, also walls between hotel rooms. (He eats Green Berets for breakfast; was hungry)[/li][li][Murders the shit](http://youtu.be/t9Qp5Dmm88M) out of about 200 soldiers, including slicing the top of two guys’ heads off with circular saw blades thrown like Frisbees[/li][li] Picks up a blunt iron pipe and throws it like a giant dart **through** the bad guy’s body with such force that it punctures another pipe behind him so that steam can escape. “Let off some steam, Bennett!”[/li][/ul]
I thought the same thing for the same reasons. I’m tempted to even put him above Conan; as cool as he is, Arnold’s Conan is a badass partly because you know his backstory and you know that Conan is simply a badass in any incarnation. All of Arnold’s characters are badasses to varying degrees, but Matrix is a freaking murder machine stuck in the on position.
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### Author:  [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/31 "2014-02-14T05:40:19Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#):
>
> Commando is the best action movie ever made outside of the sci-fi or fantasy genres which is what I think we are looking for here.
I know right! Embarrassingly, I was a big Arnold fan when I was a kid, but didn’t even know this one existed until much later. It’s stupid, it knows it, and it’s awesome.
> [@pravnik](#):
>
> I thought the same thing for the same reasons. I’m tempted to even put him above Conan; as cool as he is, Arnold’s Conan is a badass partly because you know his backstory and you know that Conan is simply a badass in any incarnation. All of Arnold’s characters are badasses to varying degrees, but Matrix is a freaking murder machine stuck in the on position.
Conan could’ve been played by many people, that is true. Matrix could’ve been say, Stallone, but that wouldn’t be nearly as fun.
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### Author:  [@mlees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlees)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/32 "2014-02-14T14:59:12Z")
Heh. No love for _Raw Deal_? [Raw Deal (1986) - IMDb](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091828/?ref_=nv_sr_1)
I guess that’s because there isn’t a whole lot of memorable quips. But Robert Davi was in it!
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### Author:  [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/33 "2014-02-14T15:36:20Z")
#1 = John Matrix (Commando), for previously stated reasons. He’s an unstoppable killing machine, even more so than:
#2 = The Terminator, both times.
#3 = Quaid (Total Recall). Defeats ALL the bad guys, including himself!
#4 = Conan the Barbarian – never seen the entire movie, but the “lamentations of their women” scene is badass enough to place number four.
#5 = Trench (The Expendables). More of a badass move by Schwarzenegger himself, who believed in the film strongly enough to take a weekend off from playing Governator and film a memorable cameo role:
_“What’s his problem?”
“He wants to be President!”_#6 = Harry Tasker (True Lies). Loves his wife, and he gives his horse a serious dressing down.
#7 = John Kimble (Kindergarten Cop), who doesn’t have a tumah.
#8 = Dutch (Predator). Unforunately spends most of the movie running & hiding from the extraterrestrial enemy, which isn’t very badass, even though he does sacrifice himself to win.
#9 = Ben Richards (Running Man). Pretty badass, says a few quotable lines, but this movie sucks so bad I’m penalizing him for it.
#10 = Julius Benedict (Twins). Gimme a break…
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/34 "2014-02-14T15:58:15Z")
> [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](#):
>
> Harry Tasker, at his truth-serum-fueled best (_“yah, but dey vere all bad”_) does okay…
I love _True Lies_ - hands down, my favorite Ahnuld movie. Exciting script that plays to his strengths, good gags, a fantastic supporting cast (hot wife, funny sidekick), cool sfx (still love the Harriers launching missiles at the bridge), and the best pelican in Hollywood history.
Plus he _tangos_, dammit!
Gotta be Harry.
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### Author:  [@Dale\_Sams](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dale_Sams)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/35 "2014-02-14T16:03:52Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#):
>
> I love _True Lies_ - hands down, my favorite Ahnuld movie. Exciting script that plays to his strengths, good gags, a fantastic supporting cast (hot wife, funny sidekick), cool sfx (still love the Harriers launching missiles at the bridge), and the best pelican in Hollywood history.
>
> Plus he _tangos_, dammit!
>
> Gotta be Harry.
I haven’t seen it, but I like the ones where his dialogue is limited…such as _Conan_ and _Predator_.
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### Author:  [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/36 "2014-02-14T19:09:48Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#):
>
> I love _True Lies_ - hands down, my favorite Ahnuld movie. Exciting script that plays to his strengths, good gags, a fantastic supporting cast (hot wife, funny sidekick), cool sfx (still love the Harriers launching missiles at the bridge), and the best pelican in Hollywood history.
>
> Plus he _tangos_, dammit!
>
> Gotta be Harry.
Great bad guys too - I love the quick scene where an underling is recording his “the World will pay” speech and the battery runs out…and the underling is terrified of having to explain to the boss that he needs to start over, and slowly lowers the camera.
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### Author:  [@TonySinclair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TonySinclair)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/37 "2014-02-14T19:20:55Z")
I’m wondering why nobody has mentioned _Eraser_, even in lists that go all the way down to _Twins_ and _Jingle All the Way_?
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### Author:  [@TonySinclair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TonySinclair)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/38 "2014-02-14T19:26:59Z")
> [@dogbutler](#):
>
> But Conan killed a vulture with his teeth while nailed to the Tree of Woe. That’s badass.
I was in a PX in Germany about 40 years ago (jeez!), looking for something to read, and just by chance, I started thumbing through a paperback (because of the Frazetta babe on the cover), and the first passage I read was that one. Since then, I’ve read every Conan story RE Howard has written, along with almost all the pastiches. Robert Jordan’s were good, but IMO the best were by John Maddox Roberts.
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### Author:  [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/39 "2014-02-14T19:40:17Z")
I also want to say that _the Last Action Hero_ is a seriously underrated film, and really quite fun. Very “genre savvy.” Tywin Lannister is the bad guy.
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [February 14, 2014, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rank-the-arnold-schwarzenegger-characters-in-badassery/681241/40 "2014-02-14T19:43:15Z")
> [@thelurkinghorror](#):
>
> I also want to say that _the Last Action Hero_ is a seriously underrated film, and really quite fun. Very “genre savvy.” Tywin Lannister is the bad guy.
Likewise in the otherwise-crapfest Eddie Murphy movie _The Golden Child_.
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