# Rant. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 8, 2001, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274 "2001-03-08T22:25:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![McMurphy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e19adc/32.png) [@McMurphy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/McMurphy)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2001, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/1 "2001-03-08T22:25:04Z")
I have two ‘friends’ called David and Ben (names changed). Now, Ben has just started going out with a new girl. I can’t stand her. No-one can, she’s utterly obnoxious. She was at a gathering of our circle of friends the other day and she succeeded in pissing off everybody else in the room. I do NOT like her. Anyway, David and I were talking about her on MSM this morning, he disliked her just as much as I did and in this exchange I happened to mention that if Ben asked me outright what I thought of her I’d lie to protect his feelings. David also said he’d do the same. So, I’m on MSM again tonight and David requests to chat to me again and during this second conversation he gets me to repeat my feelings about Bens new girlfriend. Guess who else is with David? Yup, you guessed it, Ben. Now Ben most likely thinks I’m a cunt. He accuses me of not knowing her well enough to make that judgement. He is probably extremely pissed with me (I cannot say for certain because I didn’t see him face to face). To Ben. You stupid blind, ignorant fuckwit! What the hell is wrong with you if you can’t see what’s right infront of your goddam fucking face! I know I’ve only met her twice but I know a bitch when I see one and it didn’t take me ten minutes to figure out that your new lady friend is a 100% grade A bitch. She insults you, she belittles you, she takes the piss out of you, she calls you the exact same things those kids who used to make you cry in high school called you but for some bizarre reason it doesn’t sink in. Fuck it, you obviously get off on emotional anguish so why should I get in your way? Also, not only do I have my own observations, I have testimony from other people who know her a damn sight better than you do. They say…wait for it…THAT SHE’S A FUCKING BITCH!!! Maybe it’s because I’m not a retarded cockshiner like yourself but why oh why can’t you see what’s so plainly obvious? Fuck it, I give up. I’m done with you. To David. Words cannot express the contempt I feel for you right now. You worthless, snide, backstabbing little shit-'fer-brains limp dicked genital chancre. You are a walking advertisement for the beneficial joys of sterilisation for the worthless, retarded drug addled cunts your parents so obviously were. I expressely told you that I didn’t want to tell Ben what I thought of his new girlfriend (a) because it was not my place to say it (b) because I felt she needed a second chance and © because I didn’t want to hurt his feelings because he obviously like _something_ about her. So what do you go and do? You deliberately orchestrate a situation where you know he will be forced to listen to what I think of his girlfriend (even though my opinion is totally unnecessary) and then you trick me into telling him. You CUNT. I am so pissed off right now I think I’m gonna flip out. Voice. ---
**Author:** ![aenea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c68b51/32.png) [@aenea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aenea)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2001, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/2 "2001-03-08T23:07:40Z")
Nice groove, has a decent rythm. I can almost dance to it. Good rant. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Thrasymachus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ce73a5/32.png) [@Thrasymachus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thrasymachus)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2001, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/3 "2001-03-08T23:23:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TheVoiceofReason \* > \*\* > Now Ben most likely thinks I’m a cunt. > \*\* Serves you right for being duplicitous. I wouldn’t want a friend to lie to me and then leap into a foaming rage when she’s called on it. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2001, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/4 "2001-03-08T23:46:53Z")
> [@](#): > > You worthless, snide, backstabbing little shit-'fer-brains limp dicked genital chancre. You are a walking advertisement for the beneficial joys of sterilisation for the worthless, retarded drug addled cunts your parents so obviously were. Voice of Reason indeed. Sorry, just wanted to be the first to say that. Carry on. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2001, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/5 "2001-03-08T23:49:44Z")
> [@](#): > > Serves you right for being duplicitous. > > I wouldn’t want a friend to lie to me and then leap into a foaming rage when she’s called on it You are obviously a member of the female persuasion. Badmouthing a friend’s girlfriend is one of those things that are Just Not Done - it’s a core tenant of the Guy Code. I’ve been in a similar situation, and the harshist thing I ever told my friend was: “Listen, you’re one of my best friends. I’d _never_ say anything bad about the woman you love. Can we change the subject?” He understood. And Voice - If you want them to still be your friends, apologize to Ben and beat the shit out of David. Otherwise, the hell with them. ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2001, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/6 "2001-03-09T02:12:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Thrasymachus \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by TheVoiceofReason \* > > \*\* > > Now Ben most likely thinks I’m a cunt. > > \*\* > > Serves you right for being duplicitous. > > I wouldn’t want a friend to lie to me and then leap into a foaming rage when she’s called on it. > \*\* I gotta agree. But hey - dont sweat it, once you get past the junior high years, stuff gets easier. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Joachim\_Pieper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/91b2a8/32.png) [@Joachim\_Pieper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joachim_Pieper)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2001, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/7 "2001-03-09T13:13:54Z")
Use the phone, not the internet. Problem solved… ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2001, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/8 "2001-03-09T13:18:48Z")
What? Is the **VoiceofReason** not allowed to have an opinion? Is **VoiceofReason** not allowed to verbalize that opinion to someone he/she considers a friend in a private conversation? Is it somehow wrong for **VoiceofReason** to decide to hold his/her toungue when that opinion might hurt a friend? **Spooje** ’s advise is as follows. Don’t apologize to Ben, you did nothing wrong. Do beat the living snot out of Daniel for the set-up. ---
**Author:** ![LateComer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b5ac83/32.png) [@LateComer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LateComer)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2001, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/9 "2001-03-09T14:11:38Z")
**TheVoiceofReason** : Are you and your friends, by any chance, cast members of the recent movie “Saving Silverman”? ---
**Author:** ![inor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f475e1/32.png) [@inor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/inor)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2001, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/10 "2001-03-09T14:24:43Z")
Sorry about this happening to you- hope you still ain’t griends withthem. I really dig on **Alessans** solution- she really sounds classy. Well, anyway, sorry bout this ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2001, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/11 "2001-03-09T15:17:09Z")
> [@](#): > > I really dig on Alessan’s solution- she really sounds classy. She? ---
**Author:** ![aenea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c68b51/32.png) [@aenea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aenea)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2001, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/12 "2001-03-09T15:25:17Z")
😃 Awww c’mon **Alessan** , she…he…what the hell, eh? 😉 It was still a very good solution. ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2001, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/13 "2001-03-09T15:28:19Z")
Voice and David had a private conversation. They both agreed not to tear down Ben’s girlfriend, because it would hurt Ben’s feelings. No problem there. However, _lying_ about it isa bad idea, if for no other reason than you would have had this woman continually around you (Or as much around you as Ben was, I mean). However, David is a spineless asshole. No friend would have set you up like that. ---
**Author:** ![racerx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/5e9695/32.png) [@racerx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racerx)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2001, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/14 "2001-03-09T15:33:56Z")
Godammmit! I hate it when friends don’t act like friends. And nothing feels more like betrayal than when two friends don’t act like friends purposely towards another friend. Sorry **VoiceofReason** , you have every right to feel hurt and pissed right now. If they are worthy at all they will realize they treated you like shit and will start acting like friends again. As a woman (pshaw. lets face it, I’m a girl) I would want to know if my friends didnt like my boy. I understand things are different for guys. FTR, **Alessan** I was not confused about your gender. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2001, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rant/57274/15 "2001-03-09T17:19:23Z")
Sure, you don’t have to apologize to Ben… if being “right” is what you care about the most. But consider this - the guy’s either deeply in love, or deeply in lust with this girl; either way, it’s not his _brain_ he’s thinking with, is it? In his place, you probably would be no more capable of rational thought. So have some pity for the poor schmuck. Apologize, make nice, keep the friendship going, and some day (probably sooner than you think) this whole mess will blow over and you’ll all have a nice, cynical laugh. With David, on the other hand, you need a serious reassesmant of your relationship. Don’t let him off easy. That’s all I have to add. I am now going to spend half an hour scratching my balls and belching, in order to reaffirm my masculinity. 😛