# Real-life situations that read like crappy soap opera scenario rejects **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 21, 2014, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-situations-that-read-like-crappy-soap-opera-scenario-rejects/707811 "2014-12-21T06:45:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 5\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2014, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-situations-that-read-like-crappy-soap-opera-scenario-rejects/707811/21 "2014-12-24T23:52:50Z")
> [@LavenderBlue](#): > > Guy marries first wife. First wife has only dead boys and a girl so he divorces her. Guy marries second wife. Second wife only has a girl so he chops her head off. Marries third wife who dies after giving him a son. Marries fourth wife but decides she’s ugly so he divorces her. Marries fifth wife but accuses her of cheating on him so he chops her head off. Marries sixth wife who gets happy when he dies on her. > > I think we all know who this person is. > > 😃 Second verse - same as the first. ---
**Author:** ![SCAdian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scadian/32/3292_2.png) [@SCAdian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCAdian)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2014, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-situations-that-read-like-crappy-soap-opera-scenario-rejects/707811/22 "2014-12-25T04:26:33Z")
My ex-wife’s first husband: Two of his brothers got divorced, then married each other’s exes - and then both couples moved into a house together. ---
**Author:** ![usedtobe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ec9cab/32.png) [@usedtobe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/usedtobe)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2014, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-situations-that-read-like-crappy-soap-opera-scenario-rejects/707811/23 "2014-12-25T04:28:36Z")
How about: Daddy leaves mommy and baby to build a slumlord empire. He collects the rent in person - cash. Yeah, after a couple of decades, the IRS notices. Daddy has “crown jewel” property, which the IRS is trying on for size. Baby is now 18+, so daddy puts the title of crown jewel in kid’s name and moves him in (rent control). Not surprisingly to anybody, baby turns out bad - as in prison bad. Fast forward. Baby is now 36 and out of prison. Baby is found dead of OD in motel. Hold on, folks, it gets strange: Daddy recruits “buddy” to move body. Daddy boxes up baby and puts him in basement of crown jewel, behind a false wall, Daddy now also lives in crown jewel. Unrelated to any of this, the police are called to crown jewel. Daddy sees police, decides “Game Over”, steps outside with pistol and kills self. There’s more - disputed will, judgements reversed on appeal, a woman who married baby for no apparent reason, sleazy lawyers, and enough misc. for an entire season. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2014, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-situations-that-read-like-crappy-soap-opera-scenario-rejects/707811/24 "2014-12-25T05:26:46Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > Yeah, and they did do a TV series. But he didn’t do the headcutting himself, you know… And he could have hired a headcutter who knew his job a little better. He should have buried the body and the head far far away from each other, lest she come back with her head tucked underneath her arm. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2014, 5:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-situations-that-read-like-crappy-soap-opera-scenario-rejects/707811/25 "2014-12-25T05:46:00Z")
I knew I’d [told this one](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=12717372&postcount=36) before… Extra kicker, not included in that piece: Dr C claimed that he was unhappy in his marriage because Mrs C only gave him daughters (well, Mrs C and… not Mrs C). The additional children from his second marriage have all been daughters. The son his second wife was carrying when she filed for divorce from her first husband is the first husband’s. Local women tend to view this detail with extreme glee, “she only gave him daughters, uh? Gee, seems like he only makes daughters!”; take into account that those women begin by finding the sexism inherent in “she only gave me daughters” enormously offensive. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-situations-that-read-like-crappy-soap-opera-scenario-rejects/707811.md?page=1)